37-year-old Dad of 4 and 6-year-olds insists on cooking dinner at his restaurant every night, wife demands he stop

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Apr 17, 2026 11:15 AM EDT

Would you enjoy eating restaurant food for dinner every single night? 

It's a tough question! 

On first glance, you'd probably be like, "Well duh, of course I would! Who wouldn't want freshly prepared, restaurant-quality meals prepped by an actual chef? Don't we all want dinners that are high-quality and incredibly delicious?"

But then, when you think about it more, you might start to doubt that choice. Because as delicious as meals at restaurants are, they're not especially healthy. The reason they taste so good is because chefs use lot of oil and butter and salt in their dishes. Plus, these meals can be heavy. Sometimes you just want something light and simple, like some chicken, rice, and an applesauce cup, or a salad with a salmon filet. 

This person is a chef who cooks dinner for his wife and his 2 little kids each day. However, he cooks it at work —  he works at his father's restaurant, which he plans to run one day, so it just makes sense that he'd whip something up while still on the clock during a 12-hour day. 

His wife, though, seems extremely frustrated by this, and she has not held back while scolding him about it! 

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  • Father reads story to his 2 young daughters.
    via Getty Images

    Father reads story to his 2 young daughters.

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Am I wrong for refusing to cook dinner again at home after cooking all day at my job as a chef?

    (Throwaway account) I'm. 37M. My wife 35F and we've two kids of age 4 & 6. I'm a full time Chef. She's does part-time WFH and manages house alone till I come back home. I work at my Father's restaurant. I
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  • leave for work by 7 AM and come back by 6 PM. Almost a 12-hour demanding job, both physically and mentally. Have to stand and work all day.
    via Gaysax69
  • I always cook my breakfast early in the morning. I don't have to worry about my lunch as I eat at restaurant. Wife has to always cook her and kids' breakfast and lunch as they wake up after I leave. I always make everyone's dinner
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  • and she does the dishes. I primarily manage kids after coming back home. It's going like this since years and a mutually agreed plan. My dad is strict with work as I'll be taking over the restaurant after him.
    via Gaysax69
  • As I'm cooking all day since years, I get too tired (both mentally and physically) to do it freshly again at home. So I cook our dinner at restaurant. I DON'T pick up the leftover food. I prepare a totally new batch of home-style food, totally
    via Gaysax69
  • customized for our taste (less spicy and oily, no garlic etc). Using ingredients that are more fresh then household items and cook it in separate pots.
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  • Chef prepares meals at restaurant.
    via Louis Hansel

    Chef prepares meals at restaurant.

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • I pack it up and reach home within 10-15 mins. 99% of times the food is hot. Even if it isn't (which is a very exceptional case) we've got all the kitchen appliances to heat it again. Since a while, she's complaining about it, which I would
    via Gaysax69
  • say are kinda excuses. Like food's not fresh, sometimes comes cold (only the sauce came cold ONCE, and it was when I was having a bad day and in no mood to prepare a new sauce just before ending my shift).
    via Gaysax69
  • She says she's tired of eating "restaurant food", even though it's not. I make whatever she wants. But she wants me to start cooking dinner at home. It sounds small,
    via Gaysax69
  • but I get too tired to start it all over again at home, after rigorously doing the same thing at work whole day.
    via Gaysax69
  • At home it takes double the time and I get tired too. At work it's less pressure as I'm still in the working mode. We're having arguments and she suggested voting.
    via Gaysax69
  • But I think our kids are too small to vote for this. Kids love my food, and it's healthy. I've asked her many times what's the actual issue. But she just repeats the same things. Now she
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  • has started complaining about my food even if there isn't any issue at all. Like salt is less, spice is too much, onion overcooked etc. Deliberately irritating me.
    via Gaysax69
  • I've to hear all her grumbling after coming home, tired and exhausted. Finally, I've told her that if it keeps getting like this, then she can cook her own dinner and I'll bring the dinner only for kids and me. AITAH?????
    via Gaysax69

  • People always want to date someone who cooks, but chefs themselves will tell you straight-up — they do not want to be cooking after hours. I truly understand. Just imagine how you'd feel if you worked all day, then went home and your spouse asked you to work some more, for free! 

    However, commenters pointed out that there might be context missing, or something that's part of the bigger picture that we aren't gleaning from this story. Mainly: why is his wife so unhappy about someone else making dinner?

    It's one of those tasks that you start to dread because you have to make dinner every single night. Every afternoon you have to come up with a new idea for what to make, or you have to pull something out of the freezer to defrost it. One of the nicest things someone can do to lighten your burden is say, “Babe, don't worry about dinner, I'm gonna cook you something great.” So why is his wife so unhappy here? Are the meals not tasting good? Are they unhealthy? Are they too repetitive? People weighed in, see what you think. 

  • Maybe what she really wants is more help with the kids, or more quality family time

    Consci... I think you need a couples therapist because I doubt its about the food.
    via Gaysax69

    They won't know until they have some honest conversations about it, and therapy might help. 

  • Irish_b... NTA and it has nothing to do with the food. She is unhappy, perhaps doesn't even know why, and just flings pointless
    via Gaysax69
  • random insults around to help you understand how awful she feels. And of course what a terrible person you are.
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  • P-DubF... The person who does the job is the one who gets to decide how the job gets done. If she wants to reopen the agreement then she's opening up her end too
    via Gaysax69
  • Dad reads a book to 2 daughters.
    via Getty Images

    Dad reads a book to 2 daughters. 

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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kids chefs dad restaurant work mom
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