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“I won the lottery 11 years ago. My family still doesn't know. They think I'm broke. Ask me anything”
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How do you hide that amount from your family? Id feel guilty if any of my parents or siblings helped me out because they thought i was broke. Totally understand where you’re coming from though. 2 million can disappear quickly if everyone starts coming for handouts.
live in a small place 25 min from them, drive an old civic, dress like im broke. they think im a library guy renting a 2 bedroom. the second i appear to live above what a library wage would buy, the cover ends.
the guilt part is real. my dad slipped me 200 bucks at thanksgiving 2019 because he was worried about me making rent. i took it because not taking it would have raised more questions than taking it. i still think about that 200 bucks. its sitting in a drawer in the house i paid cash for. i couldnt spend it.
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do you still work?
i do. library assistant at the local branch. three afternoons a week, like 15 bucks an hour. i shelve, do the kids reading hour on wednesdays, run the printer when it jams. its the perfect job to look broke while not actually doing anything stressful. nobody asks the library guy why he isn't doing more with his life.
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How has this changed your life materially?
less than you'd guess. 2 bed house. 2017 civic. target clothes. what changed is the absence of a specific kind of fear. you know that feeling when you check your account before a grocery trip. i dont have that anymore. i didnt realize how much real estate that took up until it was gone.
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$2mil after taxes, invested in a brokerage account will still let you draw $100k in disposable income a year without decreasing the principal. Did you have an initial splurge buy that you couldn’t resist doing when you realized this? I mean, a watch or a $300 bottle of whiskey even?
yeah. about 3 months in, i was at a bar after a long shift and i ordered a $48 pour of pappy van winkle 15. nobody was watching, the bartender didnt know me. i drank it alone in a booth and it was the first time i let myself really feel that the money was real. anticlimactic honestly. i remember thinking thats it? for $48? then i did the math you just did. realized i could literally drink one every night for the rest of my life without touching the principal. and then i never did it again. it stopped being fun the second i knew there was no limit. the watch came years later. the whiskey was the moment.
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Be honest, does money buy happiness? Because I feel like it does, and everyone who says it doesn’t is just bitter that they don’t have more.
“Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it buys a big enough boat that you can sail right up next to it.” - David Lee Roth
diamond david lee. yeah thats about it. honestly i think about the ticket itself sometimes. the actual physical scratch off. i kept it. its in a fire safe in my closet, sealed in a sandwich bag, because it felt wrong to throw away. i look at it maybe once a year. its the only thing in the entire house that proves any of this is real.
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I read the book Mind Over Money years ago and realized what a mess money does to our wellbeing. You going to lottery winner support groups or anything to cope?
saw a th3rapist for about a year and a half starting at 21 when the secret was destroying my head. she was the only person i ever told. she helped a lot. never did the lottery winner support groups, those exist mostly for people who came out as winners and got swarmed. my problem was the opposite. there isnt really a group for "i won and told no one" because by definition you cant join it.
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How do you enjoy the money without raising suspicion? Have you bought a house, car, or taken trips? or do you keep your lifestyle low-key to avoid questions?
low key everything. small house, old civic, target. the actual enjoyment is the absence of money stress not the presence of stuff. bought a really nice mattress like 4 years ago. that was the most luxurious thing i let myself do and i still feel guilty about it.
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But won’t your family raise questions on how you could afford a house on three days a work week at a library?
cover for the house is a "first time buyer grant" plus a USDA rural loan i supposedly got at 22. the area i live in actually qualifies for usda so the story is plausible. they think i pay a tiny mortgage. mom asked once where my statement comes from and i said "online only" and that was the end of it.
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Why did you decide not to tell your mom? Can’t she be trusted?
shes the only one i could probably trust. and thats the problem. telling her makes her keep a secret from my dad and my sister for the rest of her life. shes 56 and im not putting that on her. she already worries about us enough. she doesnt need to know there is a fund somewhere with our name on it that her own daughter cant access. that would eat her alive.
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Can I ask you how old you are currently? You seem like a pretty wise person based on your other comments.
Or if you don’t want to answer directly, do you see yourself as being “retired” for life? I saw your comment about working the library, that’s cool.
30. and yeah, basically retired since 19 if you want to call it that. the library job is for routine and visibility, not income. ive thought about whether i should just quit and travel or learn something or whatever. i never do because the routine is what holds me together. without the library three afternoons a week i think id be a much worse person to be around. the money is the thing that lets me have the boring job. not the other way around.
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