Mother demands 24-year-old sister cancel her vacation so she can watch 5-year-old son while she's at work, sister replies: ‘I hope you figure something out’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
May 28, 2026 2:00 PM EDT

How much babysitting are you willing to do for a sibling before it becomes a part-time job they should pay you for?

Any favor done to an extreme can cross the line between helping someone out and downright working them for free. Even people closest to you, and often especially people closest to you, can use your "services" for their personal gain.

There are plenty of services people find themselves doing as a favor to friends and family, when in actuality, they should be paid for their time and effort. Everyone has an IT person in the family who fixes every technological problem and advises before anyone decides to buy a new printer. Before they know it, they spend hours every week helping different people with IT issues, without getting anything in return.

Similarly, as soon as your siblings start having children of their own, babysitting becomes a favor that they ask of you almost every week. As far as they are concerned, you should be happy to help them and spend some quality time with your niece or nephew, so there really isn't a reason for them to offer anything in return for the time you spend watching their kids.

And even if you truly are happy to do it, if you don't set up boundaries, your sibling is bound to take the nice favors a step too far and turn into free labor.

That is exactly what the mother in the story below is trying to do to her devoted sister, who turned to Reddit's r/AITA community in order to get an outside perspective on her family situation. On one hand, this sister wants to be there for her nephew, and genuinely enjoys every minute she spends babysitting him. On the other hand, she shouldn't be expected to drop everything and come to her sister's aid whenever she calls, and if too busy to babysit, it shouldn't be such a big deal.

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  • A depiction of an aunt and her nephew lying on a striped rug, smiling.
    via Vitaly Gariev

    A depiction of an aunt and her nephew lying on a striped rug, smiling.

  • "AITAH for refusing to watch my nephew last minute when I have a trip I've been planning for months"

    I (24F) work from home as a freelancer and live about 15 minutes from my older sister. Because I work from home people in my family seem to think
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • my schedule is just open all the time, like I'm sitting here with nothing to do.
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • My sister has a 5 year old, my nephew Caleb. He's a sweet kid but he gets sick constantly, like every other month there's something going around his daycare and he catches it.
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • This weekend I'm supposed to drive up north with two of my friends for a long weekend. We booked the cabin in February. I already paid my share, about $180 that I am not getting back.
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • My sister called me last night saying Caleb has a stomach bug and she and her husband both have shifts they cannot miss and she needs me to watch him
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • tomorrow morning into the afternoon. When I told her I was leaving for my trip she said "can't you just go a few hours later."
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • The cabin is a 4 hour drive. My friends are picking me up at 8am. It is not as simple as "go a few hours later."
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • A Woman Packing Her Luggage
    via Vlada Karpovich

    A Woman Packing Her Luggage,  displayed with a female model

  • I said no and she got really quiet and then said "he's your nephew, I would think you'd want to help." And that kind of stung because I do love Caleb, I genuinely do. But
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • I also got sick the last time I watched him when he was sick and I was in bed for five days.
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • I told her I was sorry and that | hoped she figured something out. She hung up and hasn't texted me since.
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • My mom just called and said I was being selfish and that family comes first. I don't know. Am I the a hole here?
    via Fluid_Letter_1571
  • Ok-Eye 1638 NTA. Luckily mom is really keen on family first so she can do it.
    via Ok-Eye1638
  • FlyonthewallofRed He's her son. More of her responsibility than yours. NTAH
    via FlyonthewallofRed
  • ThisRaspberry8474 So Mom just volunteered to watch him? Perfect!
    via ThisRaspberry8474
  • 2ndBestAtEverything NTA It sounds like you do quite a bit for both your sister and your nephew. Your sister is being emotionally manipulative and, given what your mother
    via 2ndBestAtEverything
  • said, I see where she learned her tactics. Go and enjoy the weekend you've planned. You've earned it.
    via 2ndBestAtEverything
  • Great_Baker NTA. You need to stop providing unlimited child care. They are not entitled to your time. If she really was this desperate she should have at least offered to compensate the money you spend on the trip.
    via Great_Baker_

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Tags

family drama kids mother siblings parenting babysitting aunt family sister trip women parents children Father vacation
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