Brother-In-Law Demands Girlfriend of 1 Month Moves in With Newlyweds, Gets Annoyed When Sister-In-Law Refuses

Author image for Ally Perry
Ally Perry • Writer and Editor
Jun 6, 2026 7:45 PM EDT

The price of marrying somebody is that you usually marry into their family, too.

Unless your spouse is no-contact with their relatives for whatever reason, part of being a good partner to them is likely going to involve some wrangling of the in-laws. Some people are blessed with the perfect family to join, but that isn't the case for the majority. Within reason, they simply have to learn to work with what they've got.

While it can be important to make an attempt at getting on well with your partner's family, it is also vital to have boundaries. There are plenty of cases of overstepping parents or difficult siblings causing issues in a relationship that don't need to be there because nobody is willing to say no to them. At first, it can seem like a green flag when a potential partner is close with their loved ones, but that can quickly turn into a headache as the relationship gets more serious. There is a difference between a healthy family relationship and being totally co-dependent on one another, or even worse, dealing with somebody who walks all over them. They should not be letting family drama get in the way of their marriage.

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  • A representation of a woman standing outside, smiling as her hair sweeps across her face
    via Evelin Tomić

    A representation of a woman standing outside, smiling as her hair sweeps across her face

  • In this story, a woman had been dealing with the issue of her brother-in-law, who had moved in with her and her husband after they had moved across the country. She felt like he was not the ideal roommate.

    Things only escalated when the brother-in-law began dating a woman and allowed things to move fast. When she and her husband came back from a weekend trip, they found that many of her belongings had been moved into their house.

    While she had initially been ambivalent about the woman living with them, she eventually decided that this was not the right move. Her brother-in-law was unhappy, and she wasn't sure if she was being unreasonable.

  • Am I wrong for telling my brother-in-law his girlfriend of 1 month can’t move in with us?

    So my husband and I moved cross country and his twin brother came along in his own vehicle. The twin and I have had some spats due to lack of respect around the house, which was expected, no big deal. Well about 2 months ago he started talking to this girl on tinder and I was so happy that
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • he was socializing and getting out there to meet new people. I've met the girl a handful of times and I think she may either be really shy or he's filled her head with BS because she won't really interact with me even if I try and make a friendly conversation with her. Anyways, my husband and I took a trip
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • back home last week, We came back this past sunday and I kid you not, half of this girls stuff is already in my house. Unenclosed cat litter box in the living space, Fridge FULL of their stuff (opened food, etc), moved my stuff around to convenience then without consulting me, using my stuff just
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • without asking. there's more, but i'm just gonna do the important stuff. Before the trip, he had asked me if she could move in with us sometime and i said "i don't have a problem with it, just give me more time." Well, he came to me last night and asked if she could live with us and I just said No. I stated
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • that since me and my husband are still newly weds, I would like to live with just me and my husband to lower the stress and grow our bond away from unneeded stress. Of course, the brother in law gave me some pushback and said "my credit score is too low and I can't afford another place." keep in mind, this girl is in college and lives in
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • her own dorm paid by her family, he has the choice to live with us for $400 a month. Is this my problem?
    via Jealous_Bill_3525
  • A representation of a man and a woman sitting on a couch, arguing with one another
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A representation of a man and a woman sitting on a couch, arguing with one another

  • Life-Education-8030 This is also his brother's/your husband's problem. What is he saying/doing about it? Why is it your problem that twin brother is a deadbeat?
    via Life-Education-8030
  • ImmediateShallot7245 He's been dating for 2 or 3 months and now he wants her to move into your house, how do entitled is he. The way they left your house while you were gone is very disrespectful! NTA
    via ImmediateShallot7245
  • TaylorMade2566 I wouldn't even want the BIL there much less some chick he just started seeing. Is he always such a mooch? Regardless, your husband needs to handle his brother but make sure you two agree on the answer. YNW
    via TaylorMade2566
  • Normal Choice9322 H I no. Protect your peace
    via Normal_Choice9322
  • DiDiPowell You are not in the wrong. Your lame husband should be dealing with his mooching twin brother. His brother needs to leave el pronto. I would throw that girl's crop in the dumpster.
    via DiDiPowell
  • These-Ad-4907 Why did he go along with you when you moved? Why didn't he stay where you moved from? Odd that newlyweds would allow a family member to live with them.
    via These-Ad-4907
  • TeamLeeper I'm not an ultimatum guy; but if I was you, the husband would be getting one in about 3 seconds.
    via TeamLeeper
  • beneficialtowhom Wonder what her parents think about her shacking up when they are footing the bill for her dorm, probably car & insurance, and school, too?
    via beneficialtowhom
  • Fickle-Secretary681 It's your husband's problem, and your problem if your husband isn't backing you up on this. I would have flipped the f out if I came home from a trip and a random person moved their sh in. Absolutely NO
    via Fickle-Secretary681
  • KaterTotMN Why in the world did his brother have to move with you in the first place, especially with the past disrespect? This with new marriage is just a recipe for stress and failure. What's the new husband saying about it all?
    via KaterTotMN

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