Friend insists that "elitist" friend is valuing an "expensive lifestyle" over their friendship: 'We have to compromise so much that it's barely the experience I wanted.'

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  Pair of friends embark on a shopping spree, in a depiction from models.

• Some folks actually blamed the friend though, claiming they have a victim mentality. I suppose they do a little bit. Calling their friend “elitist” for wanting to have a night out on the town is wild. 

  Here’s another question for this person: can they not just hang out at someone’s home? That’s usually a free or very cheap option. Having a Netflix night with some homemade food costs far less than going out for a late night of dancing and drinks. 

  This person is seemingly relying on one friend to do activities that this friend clearly doesn’t want to do. Regardless of their reasoning, this person should just try and find new additions to their friend group. That way they don’t have to blame the friend who can’t afford to go out. If they’re already feeling burnt out from the friendship, and have now been accused of prioritizing their pricey outings over that friend, maybe it’s time to admit you’re not meant to be this close. Put some space between yourselves and see what happens. Maybe you’ll end up meeting at parks or hanging at home forever, or perhaps the friendship won’t survive. But forcing repeated hangout sessions where no one is happy is a pointless endeavor for both involved. 

  
   

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  Friends enjoy ice cream cones while hanging outdoors, in a representation by models.

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  Friends try to plan a day out together, but cannot agree on where to go, in a representation by models.

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• People had a mix of reactions to this person’s story. One of their main questions was: why can’t you just do something inexpensive? 

  I think you just have to read the room in some cases. If you already know that your friend is tight on money, or has lost their job recently, you should be polite and pick something inexpensive to do. 

  Aren't there any other friends you could be painting the town red with? Surely there are other acquaintances who are excited to do the pricey activities with you. 

  This person doesn’t have to just give up all of their fun times, they just need to choose a different friend to do them with. 

  
   

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• Even coffee can be expensive if you're barely scraping by

  
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