5-star hotel server feels envious towards her coworkers as they receive positive reviews mentioning their names, and she never receives one: 'I don't know what they're doing different.'

Author image for María Cetra
María Cetra • Writer
Jul 9, 2026 8:00 PM EDT

One aspect that can make a work environment go from calm to toxic is competition among colleagues.

There is this "new trend" in restaurants where managers expect servers to receive positive reviews that mention the server who took care of the customer. Some even go as far as counting how many reviews each server got and defining things like bonuses out of that statistic. This is problematic on many levels. First of all, it makes customers uncomfortable, as they have a server that is more preoccupied about them writing their name on the review than about serving them. Secondly, it's an unfair way to measure customer service, as it doesn't take into account real good service and instead just good convincing tactics to force the customer to leave a review. And lastly, it creates a competition among coworkers that turns the environment into a toxic competition.

This last one may be the most important. This kind of competition has so many missing screws that servers start to notice that it creates a hostile workplace where, instead of focusing on good service, employees have their mind on making customers remember their server's name. It also may produce bigger problems if servers start to try to get servers with better reviews in trouble. This could produce problems in the food, uncomfortable situations with customers, and even having to fire good servers.

This Reddit story reminded me of the sentiment that this whole system can produce on some servers. This envy and frustration can develop into a problem for the restaurant. I believe it's better to focus on the day-to-day work servers do instead of focusing just on the reviews that only some customers leave. And if you are a server going through this right now, a great way to step up your game is being more assertive, repeating your name a few times over the night, and making the customer feel like a priority, even though you have more than 10 customers at the same time. 
 

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  • I work as a waitress at a 5\* hotel in the summer at a touristy island. I've been working at this hotel for 5 years. A bunch of my coworkers get mentioned by name in the reviews people leave. I try my best to smile and chat up the guests. I try to read them first and see if they'd like to have a conversation cause some don't really want much interaction.
    via lonelypoem24
  • A phone opened in an app to review a service that was received.
    via Revyoo

    A phone opened in an app to review a service that was received. 

  • I'm not saying I'm jealous of my coworkers. Instead, if they do a great job and guests are happy, they deserve to be mentioned by name for their excellent service and professionalism. It's just, I also try my best. I'm an introvert and I try to be as sociable as possible, as much as I can cause there's also lots of pressure and running around (we have 1000 guests and we are 6 servers).
    via lonelypoem24
  • I smile, I'm polite, I anticipate needs and take care of it before they ask. I don't know what they're doing different. I really wanted to get this off my chest for a while now. If you read it all, thank you so much for your time! Take care
    via lonelypoem24
  • A plate is being served at a table in a fancy restaurant.
    via Jay Wennington

    A plate is being served at a table in a fancy restaurant. 

  • magiccitybhm More than likely, they're asking for those reviews. I'm not a fan of that (as a server or as a guest), but it absolutely happens.
    via lonelypoem24
  • ExpertRaccoon Most likely, they are asking for reviews. Secondly, are you introducing yourself? A simple "HI I'm lonelypoem24, and I'll be your server tonight" while maintaining eye contact can go a long way
    via lonelypoem24
  • Conch Vibes They're likely asking for those reviews. I typically had a higher tip percentage than some others yet they got positive reviews. I'll take the tips any day. Then, as a manager, I had contests to
    via lonelypoem24
  • get the most good reviews. Some of the worst people got the best positive reviews while some of the best had few or none. Some people aren't comfortable asking and that's fine. I was always one of those people myself. Your job is to serve them well. Let the restaurant figure out reviews/marketing.
    via lonelypoem24
  • mojaverevenant Actually, it's the servers who ask for reviews mentioning them by name. You might want to try that if you're comfortable. I think what matters is that guests leave feeling welcomed and happy with the experience.
    via lonelypoem24
  • gromit3 I've been to hotel lounges and self- serve buffets where the server introduced herself and gave me a slip of paper or card with her name, and asked me to mention her in my review if I was happy with her service. It definitely worked for her, bc reviews of that hotel did mention her by name frequently.
    via lonelypoem24
  • paerplk I stay a lot at a certain hotel where I really think most of the staff are really good. Unfortunately most of them are female and have a name tag placed quite low on their chest with a very small text. On top of that, most of them have a big textile flower placed directly beneath the sign. So whenever I would try to read their
    via lonelypoem24
  • name it basically looks like I am trying to look down their blouses. This means that the only ones I mention by name in my reviews are the male staff (without them asking for it). Basically please make sure you have an easily readable nametag.
    via lonelypoem24
  • Icy-Management9880 Some servers just have that it factor... I knew a few in my time serving. Don't take it too hard.
    via lonelypoem24

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Tags

envy reviews customer service toxic-work-environment
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