Retired dad wants his 40-year-old son to move out with his family after living rent-free for 17 years, but his wife keeps overruling him asks for advice: 'I need fresh eyes'

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  • Older man grimaces beside bold white text reading, “They moved in with us ‘for a while’ in 2009.”
  • I married my wife 30+ years ago and adopted our son soon thereafter. I supported him in Boy Scouts Troop 175 and in high school swim league which made it to Georgia State competition.
  • They did well, for first year. I encouraged him and supported him to go to Philmont Scout Ranch and worked with him to attain Eagle Scout.
  • Older man reclines outdoors in a chair, looking pensive with greenery blurred behind him.
  • I thought he was going places. I had to move to Washington DC Area. I introduced my wife to folks who hired her, and she made hundreds more per year than previously.
  • As this happened, my son withdrew. He went to an excellent high school but bailed on going to college - even junior college.
  • He held menial jobs and moved in with us when we bought a house in Fredericksburg.
  • He left once - at the urging of my wife - and in that time met a gal, married, and they became preg nt.
  • Then they moved in with us "for a while" in 2009. He got a job close by and he and wife had a total of 2 babies, which my wife cannot be without.
  • Older man reclines outdoors on a cushioned chair, making a puckered expression with greenery behind him.
  • Please note, we paid for all rent, food, utilities (except cable) for our extended family. Every time I presses for them moving out and becoming more independent, my wife interceded and shot me down.
  • I was being too mean. I am never allowed to confront the passive- aggressive behavior. Our President made sure both my wife and I retired this past year.
  • So now I do not need to stay in the DC Area - which is not my favorite.
  • My son wants us all to move to Buffalo because he (in ignorance) likes snow. While, I really do not care, my wife - who hates the cold - is in support of this AND insists we buy the Son and family their own home there.
  • I am in favor of buying them a house as rent-to- purchase, charging rent (through an agent), and still I am being fought by wife and son.
  • I am seriously thinking of buying a house where my wife can join me when she decides, and buying a house (rent-to-purchase) for my son and family where he rents until the mortgage is paid.
  • I am being viewed as the a hole. I need fresh eyes. Thanks.

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