72-year-old mom agrees to pay $500 in rent to live in her 45-year-old daughter's house, goes back on promise after secretly racking up thousands of dollars in debt

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jul 24, 2026 7:45 AM EDT

She's doing this because she doesn't think her daughter will kick her out of the house. 

You cannot fix your problems by throwing money at them. If you're a miserable sourpuss who is convinced that you're a blight on the universe, your self-esteem isn't suddenly going to improve because you have a lot of dough in the bank. If you are a homebody who always complains that you don't have any friends, a generous stock profile isn't going to make you a fun hang. There's a huge group of men online who think that money would solve all of their dating problems, but that's just not true. If she doesn't like you when you make six figures, she's not going to change her tune if you get a sizable raise in two months. Money can be used as a tool to improve your life, but a lot of your problems don't have anything to do with money at all. 

Having money can't solve the root cause of your money problems. If someone is terrible with their money, they're going to be terrible with it whether they're making $50K a year or $200K a year. Giving a financially irresponsible person a sizable sum of money to pay off their debts might propel them into a debt-free lifestyle, but that's contingent on their stopping the things that got them into debt in the first place. If someone keeps getting bailed out, you can't be surprised when they start to expect it.

The woman in this story keeps bailing her mother out, not by paying her debts, but by giving her a place to live, even though her mother keeps throwing her money away. Some people think that it's only right to house your parents, even when their own stupidity is putting them into bad financial situations. Would you charge your mom rent if she kept getting herself into bad financial situations? Would you have the gall to kick her out if she failed to pay her portion of the rent?

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • An elderly mother who keeps racking up debt and can't afford the measly $500 rent her daughter charges her to live in her house.
    via Vitaly Gariev

    An elderly mother who keeps racking up debt and can't afford the measly $500 rent her daughter charges her to live in her house. 

    The image is representative. The subject in the story is not the woman in the photo. 

  • Am I the bad guy for charging my mother "rent" for living with us?

    My mother (72F) lives in my (45F) home with me, my husband (50M) and our son (21M). Mom has lived with us for 11 years now, we bought our house 7 years ago but she moved in with us when we were still in an apartment. We offered her
    via u/FoxieMail
  • to stay with us then after a VERY LONG series of bad financial decisions on her part that led to her filing bankruptcy and not effectively holding down a job. We did not ask her for any money while we were still in the apartment, just
    via u/FoxieMail
  • asked her to pick up some groceries occasionally. We gave up our master bedroom with private bathroom in the apartment so she wouldn't have to share a bathroom with our son at the time.
    via u/FoxieMail
  • When we were getting ready to buy a house, a full year out, we asked her before we even started looking if she was planning to continue staying with us or not. We all discussed and agreed that if she was staying with us when we moved, then we needed
    via u/FoxieMail
  • some contribution from her because we needed to build an emergency fund and some savings. I had been covering all the expenses but it was unreasonable for us to do that forever. She agreed. By this time she was working again and she had 4 years to save money and
    via u/FoxieMail
  • stabilize. She said she wanted to stay with us, so she was invited to participate in the house shopping process. We went with a new build and came down to two options IF she was staying with us: a 3 bed/3 bath with an open den, but the
    via u/FoxieMail
  • bathrooms were not attached to the bedrooms, or what we chose - a 4 bed/3 bath with ensuite bathrooms - one being a "jack and jill" connecting my son's room to the smallest room, which is my office. Mom has an entire quarter that's entirely hers. If she
    via u/FoxieMail
  • was not going to stay with us, we were going to go with a 3/2 instead. Mom liked the one we purchased best, but it was a significant price jump as the square footage difference was significant. When I ran the numbers, we agreed on $500 per month from her.
    via u/FoxieMail
  • Well, we made the deposit, waited a year for the build, finally moved in and money was not forthcoming from her. She did contribute to some new house expenses around $2000 total that we did NOT ask her for, just things she decided to buy "for the house". After 9
    via u/FoxieMail
  • months I sat down with her and said we appreciated the house items, but as we talked about we did need her to contribute the $500 each month. It went fine for a while but then she secretly racked up a ton of debt again (on her own, I have no idea on
    via u/FoxieMail
  • what, all on credit cards) And she started getting passive aggressive and making little resentful comments that she couldn't do things because she had no money. I didn't know about the debt at the time because she is not transparent and hides
    via u/FoxieMail
  • things. It has only gotten worse over time and as she's gotten older. She's now retired but her retirement income alone is almost equal what I make in a month. She has no expenses other than her debts and what she buys for herself.
    via u/FoxieMail
  • We pay for her phone and tablet we added her to our - family plan and her share is about $75/month. We buy all the groceries and there is plenty of everything, she only needs to buy something if it's a food the rest of us wouldn't eat or buy. She wanted Netflix and
    via u/FoxieMail
  • paid for it for 6 months and then her card kept declining so we took it over. She wanted a new mattress, we replaced her whole set. We don't ask for help with utilities or anything else. She does let us use her car because ours dd unexpectedly and I can't
    via u/FoxieMail
  • take on another car payment right now, but we rarely use it as I work from home and we don't go out often. The mortgage payment has gone up substantially in the last 7 years due to taxes and insurance increases. I've never asked for an extra cent from her.
    via u/FoxieMail
  • But every month it's like pulling teeth to get her to contribute. She also doesn't lift a finger around the house, including cleaning her own messes (like dishes). I know she has also complained to her friends and some family members that we "charge her rent". I
    via u/FoxieMail
  • don't know why she thinks she should just get a free ride from me. We've had a difficult relationship since I was a teenager but I'm an only child and I didn't want to see my mom end up homeless. She's also had health issues and there's no one else to look out for her.
    via u/FoxieMail
  • I don't think I am, but I'm starting to feel like I'm taking crazy pills with how she's acting about it. AITAH for charging my mother $500 a month rent/room and board?
    via u/FoxieMail

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

secret house grandma debt rent old people daughter mom parents entitled people
Scroll Down For The Next Article