Employee leaves office at 5:30 for childcare, remaining coworker complains because he's afraid of ghosts: 'He's a grown man'

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  • A male employee working at a desk in an open-plan office at night
  • Am I wrong for not telling my coworker I was leaving him alone when he’s deathly afraid of ghosts?

    One of my coworkers is from a different country where ghosts are a major fear and part of their folklore. Let's call him. Tony. We work at an office at a factory where more than a dozen people have d d over the past century, including the founder. All accidents.
  • In the office we have an informal agreement that no one will leave Tony by himself. He likes to work later (usually 10-6pm) but will use leave if no one can stay with him. We do it out of courtesy. I should also note we can choose the hours we work as long as it's 80 every 2 weeks.
  • Last Friday I was planning to work late. Tony did his usual survey of the office to see who would be staying the latest so he could plan. I told him I was going to be in until 6:30. He was happy because he could make up some time from earlier in the week. Around 5;30 my wife messaged me to say she wasn't feeling well and asked if I could come home and take care of our toddler. Of course I said yes.
  • Here's where I may be the a h_le. I went to Tony's desk but he wasn't there. I checked the rest of the office and everyone else was gone. After maybe 5 minutes I decided I wasn't going to wait anymore and left. About 20 minutes later Tony started texting me asking where I was and when I told him I left he got really upset. He wasn't
  • "yelling" or anything, but kept asking why I would leave without telling him. I apologized and told him I needed to go take care of my kid and couldn't wait any longer.
  • Yesterday I came into the office and it was like I was caught on tape kicking a puppy. Everyone was pred at me and told me I should have waited longer. The way I see it is staying late is just a courtesy. I get it's a big deal to him, but my family is more important and it's not like I just walked out. Idk if he was in the bathroom or what, but I waited
  • for him for a few minutes. He's a grown man and could pack up and leave on his own when he realized I wasn't there. So AITA for not telling my coworker I was leaving work despite his severe fear of ghosts?
  • The view through an office window with the blinds down at night
  • Quirky_Donut_1704 YTA when you couldn't find him you could have texted. Whilst you have no obligation to stay, Basic communication to your coworkers is a reasonable expectation
  • stankenfurter Yta why didn't you text him
  • JustATraveler676 ... Why could Tony text you, but in the few minutes you were waiting for him you couldn't do the same?
  • I don't care much for a grown up adult that's scared of ghosts.. I'm not aware of any culture where the whole population are like that, but it was minimum effort to send a text to save someone else some distress, or at least leave a note on his desk, the whole issue is that Tony got distressed that for a while he didn't know what happened, so in that sense yeah, YTA.
  • Wise_Sun_9910 Leaning towards soft YTA. You aren't responsible for his fear but you're aware of how severe it is, however minor it might be to you or other people, and you told him that you would be staying late.
  • You had a valid reason to leave but wasn't there any way you could've told him that you needed to go? Couldn't you have texted/called him? If it's an "informal agreement" not to leave Tony on his own and you broke that agreement then it's not surprising that the rest of the office would be p ed with you.
  • rinzler 1997 YTA. Apologize to him and next time leave a text.
  • billythevnenthusiast ESH It's the company's job to ensure reasonable accommodations for Tony, not you or his other co- workers. A text is super quick. Less effort than waiting around for 5 minutes.
  • Mrs_Weaver ESH. you could have texted him to tell him you were leaving. But he's a grown-a man who needs a babysitter because there might be ghosts? Give me a break.

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