Employee refuses to cancel paid weekend trip to cover coworker's shift after her babysitter cancels, only for manager to pressure him because she has kids: ‘My plans [are] less important’

Author image for Cata Holmes
Cata Holmes • Writer
Sep 24, 2026 7:15 AM EDT

Should having kids make one employee's time off more important than everyone else's?

This is an eternal debate between the people who have kids and the ones who don't. There's a weird line that is crossed, no matter the field or the topic, in which who have become parents feel more entitled to certain things, because having little children makes them less accommodating than others. Looks like deciding to have a child suddenly makes everything more urgent, and now you need favours from everyone…

This employee had booked a weekend trip with his friends and told his manager in advance because he needed to have that certain Friday off. The supervisor approved his request, and he was happy about it. That same week, his coworker Sarah asked if he could work Friday because her babysitter had canceled and she didn't know what to do with her kids. He told her it was impossible because he had this trip. She insisted, asked if he could at least do half a shift, and he said no. 

From my perspective, he's doing the right thing. And here's where this fine line appears. Sarah, because she's a mother, feels more entitled to have that day off than the other employee. And that's not okay. Having kids is a personal decision, and you need to be responsible about it. I don't think anyone else's free time is less valuable because they aren't parents. 

Things escalated and got even worse when the manager asked him to reconsider his decision not to help Sarah. Honestly, what's there to reconsider? He's made up his mind, and he has a trip booked… It's not like he's going to stay home doing nothing. Also, he said that he covered Sarah in the past, and that this is one of the first times that he actually can't do it.

Anyways, he ended up going on the trip (obviously), and when he returned, he noticed that Sarah was being cold and not acting normal. Another coworker called him selfish because he's not a parent and apparently can have more flexibility accommodating his time off…

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  • 01
    The employee works at his desk after refusing to give up his approved Friday off to cover his coworker's shift.
    via Unsplash+ (via Vitaly Gariev)

    The employee works at his desk after refusing to give up his approved Friday off to cover his coworker's shift.

    Scene shown is a visual representation.

  • 02
    I (29M) work for a company with around 200 employees. I've been there for 4 years and generally get along with everyone.
    via Wanitapol
  • 03
    One of my coworkers, "Sarah" (34F), has two kids, 4 and 7. She's nice enough, but over the past year I've noticed that whenever something comes up with her kids, everyone is expected to accommodate her.
    via Wanitapol
  • 04
    I've covered for her several times when she needed to leave early or couldn't make a shift. I never complained about it.
    via Wanitapol
  • 05
    A few weeks ago, I booked a weekend trip with some friends. I requested the Friday off several weeks in advance and my manager approved it. I had already paid for the hotel and transportation.
    via Wanitapol
  • 06
    A week before the trip, Sarah asked if I could work her Friday shift because her babysitter had cancelled.
    via Wanitapol
  • 07
    I told her I couldn't because I was going away.
    via Wanitapol
  • 08
    She asked if I could at least work until lunch and "figure something out" for the afternoon. I said no.
    via Wanitapol
  • 09
    She replied, "It's different when you have kids. You'll understand someday."
    via Wanitapol
  • 10
    The next day my manager asked me if I'd reconsider. He said Sarah didn't have anyone else available and that it would really help her out.
    via Wanitapol
  • 11
    Employee talks with his coworkers after refusing to cancel his paid weekend trip to cover their shift.
    via Unsplash+ (via Vitaly Gariev)

    Employee talks with his coworkers after refusing to cancel his paid weekend trip to cover their shift.

    Representative only.

  • 12
    I reminded him that my time off had already been approved and that I'd paid for everything.
    via Wanitapol
  • 13
    He said he understood, but added that I should remember Sarah has two young children and that "people with families sometimes need a little more flexibility."
    via Wanitapol
  • 14
    I told him I'd already been flexible several times and didn't think having kids automatically made my plans less important.
    via Wanitapol
  • 15
    I went on my trip.
    via Wanitapol
  • 16
    When I came back, Sarah was noticeably colder toward me. Another coworker told me I was being selfish because I apparently knew Sarah was struggling with childcare.
    via Wanitapol
  • 17
    I asked how I was supposed to know that when she only told me after my vacation was approved.
    via Wanitapol
  • 18
    She said people without kids have more freedom and should be willing to give a little.
    via Wanitapol
  • 19
    That really bothered me because this isn't the first time I've heard that argument at work. Somehow, because I don't have children, my free time gets treated like it's actually free. If Sarah needs a morning off, someone is expected
    via Wanitapol
  • 20
    to cover. If she needs to leave early, everyone is supposed to understand. But when I make plans, those plans are treated like they're optional because I don't have a family waiting for me at home.
    via Wanitapol
  • 21
    I don't begrudge her having kids, and I understand that emergencies happen. But having children doesn't make my time less valuable, and being childless doesn't mean I'm sitting around with nothing to do.
    via Wanitapol
  • 22
    At the same time, I technically could have helped her, and I know finding last-minute childcare for two young kids isn't easy. AITJ?
    via Wanitapol
  • 23
    A coworker struggles with a childcare issue after her babysitter cancels just days before her planned weekend trip.
    via Unsplash+ (via Getty Images)

    A coworker struggles with a childcare issue after her babysitter cancels just days before her planned weekend trip.

    Model portrayal.

  • 24
    carmelfan The coworker who thinks you were wrong should have covered her Friday for her.
    via Wanitapol
  • 25
    starstruckgunnie NTA. We had a situation like this at my job and I nipped. in the bud, this is a form of discrimination. You're co- workers and manager are discriminating against you for not having children.
    via Wanitapol
  • 26
    sOrela I'm flabbergasted. I was a working mom and never once tried to guilt trip someone into covering for me, let alone have a bunch of people back me up in the workplace. ? I hope this is rage bait, but I fear it's not
    via Wanitapol
  • 27
    briomio So there are 200 employees and out of 200 employees, you and apparently only you are the one that can cover her shift. Don't let them spin this OP. The next time (and there probably will be a next time) remind them that there are 200 other employees that can cover
    via Wanitapol
  • 28
    Chance-Animal 1856 If she already knows she has constant problems with child care she should figure out a backup. And you've been. plenty flexible. If there are that many employees surely someone else can help out. Where's their flexibility?
    via Wanitapol

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paid trip employee kids coworkers time off babysitting
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