How do you handle entitled neighbors as a renter? — Neighbor claims rights to tenant's driveway and garden, claims he has lived there for 15 years and has always had access: 'My neighbor treats both my backyard and my driveway as an extension of his.'

This can be just as difficult. If you rent in an area that is mostly owner-occupied, you basically get treated by the residents and neighbors as a second-class citizen. Always being regarded with wary uncertainty and a watchful eye on everything you do while they judge whether you're worthy of their neighborhood.

This comes with arbitrary sets of rules and notions that “this is the way we do things here” that can escalate from minor judgements about how you go about your business down to them straight-up helping themselves to the property you're renting. Giving vague justifications about prior arrangements and historical access, granting them rights that were never committed to paper.

Yeah, this is something that sticks firmly in my memory from various different places I rented throughout my 20s. Despite the fact that we were always quiet, friendly, and sociable, we were almost always permanently on the back foot, save for those select few treasured, usually elderly, neighbors who treated us like longtime friends.

Now that's the way to treat your neighbors.

This tenant shared their account of events that dealt with this issue of handling entitled neighbors as a tenant. The neighbor insisted that he was entitled to the use of their property. In this case, at least the property manager took the tenant's side. 

See their story below, which they originally shared with a Reddit subreddit community. Then we'll talk more about the issue and look at some of the key responses.

Neighbour treats my yard and driveway as extensions of his

Story / Grand_Cauliflower833

I rent a townhouse. The whole street rents from the same rental company.

Story / Grand_Cauliflower833

I’ve received confirmation that each townhouse pays rent and gets their own individual front lawn and back lawn. There are lot lines with the city and the lots are NOT shared yards. 

Note: “Adjoining” driveways and backyards do not mean “shared”.
My neighbor treats both my backyard and my driveway as an extension of his yard. I began installing a fence but need help as I’m on my own. 

So in the meantime I ran a rope to divide our yards. He’s been cutting the rope. I also began storing my canoe in backyard strategically as a divider. He comes into my yard while I’m at work and moves my canoe. I’ve come home to him washing his motorcycle in my driveway.

Recently, I came home to find the rope on my front steps with a note. He says my canoe and rope prevent the lawn cutters from cutting his lawn. He said it was a d**k move and prevented the neighbour kids (including his) from roaming freely between yards.
Nothing stops the lawn cutters from accessing his yard from the other side. Moreover, I’m required to leave a 4 foot maintenance gap if I install a fence. I spoke with the lawn maintenance crew and confirmed that they can easily access his yard regardless of fence or rope.

I notified the property management company who confirmed my permission to install a fence. They even told me to put the rope back up. I’m in the process of lining up the fence install (where I have crew lined up), but am afraid of retaliation from [the] neighbor. 

Edit: 
 

Sorry, forgot to mention. His note explained that he’s been here for 15 years and never had a problem using my yard before I came along. 

So I guess him being here before me counts for something?
 

Latest news: 

Lately, it’s been less about using my backyard. He literally uses my driveway. We are in a townhouse and have adjoining driveway. Note, NOT shared, but adjoining. He regularly backs his motorcycle out of his garage and well onto my driveway (even onto my front lawn) and then down my driveway into the road (I park on street). It’s literally a daily thing and I have TONS of of photos, which have been sent to property management

[Editor's note: The last sentance of this story and first paragraph of their “Edit” have been removed due to the tenant's frustrated word choice and and mention of illicit substances that don't add much to the issue at hand.]

When I rented a townhouse a few years back. I had a similar issue come up where the off-street parking space that should have been ours had been claimed by the next-door neighbors who owned theirs. There were two parking spaces out back of the townhouse, which sat below street level. 

From what I understand, there had been issues with previous tenants and their noisy vehicles down and around the back, so in an effort to give themselves some peace. The property management agency confirmed this had been the arrangement. 

The problem is, the lease clearly stated that an off-street parking space was included. This now becoming an issue that we'd have to navigate with the landlord and new neighbor seemed like a bad stroke of luck. It was just one of many problems we were already facing with the landlord and property manager who had failed to follow through on anything that had been promised to us since the lease had been signed. 

But, the driveway was a bit of a pain to get in and out. It went up and around a corner at a steep angle that went up and around the townhouse. My small Mazda 3 could just barley clear the lip that formed at the top of the slope. Besides, there was plenty of on-street parking at the street level on the ridge just above the rental. 

We decided to pick our battles. Street parking would be fine. Regardless of what was in the lease.

Well, what really was good or bad luck in this situation? As it turned out time was the deciding factor. To make a long story short, we had only lived there for a few months when a flash flood hit the townhouse. That's a story for another day, but the flood was high enough that it went into the second level of the townhouse, completely submerging both of their cars that were parked in the off-street parking down the back. Meanwhile, my little car was parked high and dry on the street level above.

What's my moral here? Well, perhaps a bit of an unusual one if you've been here for a while. You don't always have to take action just because something is unfair. Sometimes it's best to pick your battles. Wait and see. 

My own experience follows a bit in line with the Taoist parable, the "Farmer's Maybe." Which goes something like this:

One day, an old farmer's horse ran away.
"What bad luck," his neighbors said to him.
"Maybe," was all the farmer replied.
The next day, the horse returned, bringing several wild horses with it.
"What good luck!" his neighbors said.
"Maybe," the farmer repeated.
The farmer's son attempted to ride one of the wild horses. He was bucked off, breaking his leg.
"What terrible luck," his neighbors said.
"Maybe," the farmer said again.
Soon afterward, soldiers came to the village to take young men away to a war. Because the farmer's son was injured with his broken leg, they left him behind.
"What wonderful luck!" his neighbors said.
"Maybe," the farmer replied.

Essentially, the lesson is that single events are uncertain in whether they are fortunate or unfortunate. 

What seems lucky may bring trouble.
What seems unlucky may bring opportunity.


Anyways, enough from me on this one. See some of the select comments from the original thread below, and let us know your thoughts on this topic in the comments.