And That's Why We Don't Have Knives in the House Anymore

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(Mom and I watching "The First Wives' Club") Mom: You know, if your dad ever wanted to divorce me, I think I'd just murder him. Me: What, why? Mom: Because I'd rather be a widow than a first wife.

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And That's Why We Don't Have Knives in the House Anymore

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Also From Parenting Fails

Trending Now

Parents refuse to let 17-year-old go on school Marine Biology trip after telling her to refuse $45 "handout" for the fee from her teacher: 'They have been calling me ungrateful and spoiled'

Wealthy aunt tells sister-in-law-to-be that her 6 and 8-year-old step-niblings will never see a dime of their family money after she complains about her prenup: 'She said we are greedy and cruel to [her] kids'

'I'll make sure it's $30 Every. Single. Time': Employee gets reprimanded for going $1.02 over expense limit, maliciously complies with boss's orders

Employee gets scolded after one day of failing to meet daily quota, despite years of overperforming, leading employee to do only the bare minimum until quitting: ‘They lost me as an overachiever’

Customer finds loophole in store's return policy, maliciously complies to get on the entitled manager's nerves: 'You stepped out of the store, you don't get a refund'

24-year-old roommate tries to secretly sell $7,000 couch for $2,000, forcing four other housemates to hide it from him and leave $200 behind as payback: ‘I’m nervous about his reaction but I guess we’ll burn that bridge when we get to it’