This Hilarious Book From 1995 Goes Viral For Accurately Summing Up Gender Differences

in 1995, author and former journalist Dave Barry published a book called "Complete Guide to Guys." There was a passage from that book that explained the difference between men and women in such an accurate and hilarious way that people are still talking about it 23-years later. Scroll down and see for yourself. 

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  • 01
    Text - The difference between men and women Let's say a guy named Roger is attracted to a woman named Elaine. He asks her out to a movie, she accepts, and they have a pretty good time. A few nights later he asks her out to dinner, and again they enjoy themselves. They continue to see each other regularly, and after a while neither one of them is seeing anybody else
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 02
    Text - And then one evening when they're driving home, a thought occurs to Elaine, and, without really thinking, she says it aloud: "Do you realize that, as of tonight, we've been seeing each other for exactly six months?" And then there is silence in the car. To Elaine, it seems like a very
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 03
    Text - loud silence. She thinks to herself: Geez, I wonder if it bothers him that I said that. Maybe he's been feeling confined by our relationship; maybe he thinks I'm trying to push him into some kind of obligation that he doesn't want, or isn't sure of.
    via Dave Barry
  • 04
    Text - And Roger is thinking: Gosh. Six months. Elaine is thinking: But, hey, I'm not so sure I want this kind of relationship, either. Sometimes I wish I had a little more space, so I'd have time to think about whether I really want us to keep
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 05
    Text - going the way we are, moving steadily toward... I mean, where are we going? Are we just going to keep seeing each other at this level of intimacy? Are we heading toward marriage? Toward children? Toward a lifetime together? Am I ready for that level of commitment? Do I really even know this person?
    via Dave Barry
  • 06
    Text - And Roger is thinking: .so that means it was...let's see...February when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means... lemme check the odometer... Whoa! I am way overdue for an oil change here.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 07
    Text - And Elaine is thinking: He's upset. I can see it on his face. Maybe I'm reading this completely wrong. Maybe he wants more from our relationship, more intimacy, more commitment; maybe he has sensed - even before I sensed it that I was feeling some reservations. Yes, I bet that's it. That's why he's so reluctant to say anything about his own feelings. He's afraid of being rejected
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 08
    Text - And Roger is thinking: And I'm gonna have them look at the transmission again. I don't care what those morons say, it's still not shifting right. And they better not try to blame it on the cold weather this time. What cold weather? It's 87 degrees out, and this thing is shifting like garbage truck, and I paid those incompetent thieves $600
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 09
    Text - And Elaine is thinking: He's angry. And don't blame him. I'd be angry, too. I feel guilty, putting him through this, but I can't help the way feel. I'm just not sure.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 10
    Text - And Roger is thinking: They'll probably say it's only a 90-day warranty... scumballs.
    via Dave Barry
  • 11
    Text - And Elaine is thinking: May be I'm just idealistic, waiting for a knight to come riding up on his white horse, when I'm sitting right next to a perfectly good person, a person I enjoy being with, a
    via Dave Berry
  • 12
    Text - person I truly do care about, a person who seems to truly care about me. A person who is in pain because of my self-centered, schoolgirl romantic fantasy.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 13
    Text - And Roger is thinking: Warranty? They want a warranty? I'll give them a warranty. I'll take their warranty and.....
    via Dave Berry
  • 14
    Text - "Roger," Elaine says aloud. "What?" says Roger, startled. "Please don't torture yourself like this," she says, her eyes beginning to brim with tears. "Maybe I should never have... Oh God, I feel so..." (She breaks down, sobbing.)
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 15
    Text - "What?" says Roger. "I'm such a fool," Elaine sobs. "I mean, I know there's no knight. I really know that. It's silly. There's no knight,, and there's no horse."
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 16
    Text - "There's no horse?" says Roger. "You think I'm a fool, don't you?" Elaine says "No!" says Roger, glad to finally know the correct answer.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 17
    Text - "It's just that... it's that I... I need some time," Elaine says There is a 15-second pause while Roger, thinking as fast as he can, tries to come up with a safe response. Finally he comes up with one that he thinks might work. "Yes," he says. Elaine, deeply moved, touches his hand.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 18
    Text - "Oh, Roger, do you really feel that way?" she says "What way?" says Roger. "That way about time," says Elaine "Oh," says Roger. "Yes."
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 19
    Text - "Thank you," says Roger. Then he takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted, tortured soul, and weeps until dawn, whereas when Roger gets back to his place, he opens a bag of Doritos, turns on the TV, and immediately becomes deeply involved in a rerun of a tennis match between two
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 20
    Text - Elaine turns to face him and gazes deeply into his eyes, causing him to become very nervous about what she might say next, especially if it involves a horse. At last she speaks. "Thank you, Roger," she says
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 21
    Text - Czechoslovakians he never heard of. A tiny voice in the far recesses of his mind tells him that something major was going on back there in the car, but he is pretty sure there is no way he would ever understand what, and so he figures it's better if he doesn't think about it.
    via Dave Berry
  • 22
    Text - The next day Elaine will call her closest friend, or perhaps two of them, and they will talk about this situation for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyze everything she said and everything he said, going over it time and time again, exploring every word,
    via Dave Berry
  • 23
    Text - expression, and gesture for nuances of meaning, considering every possible ramification. They will continue to discuss this subject, off and on, for weeks, maybe months, never reaching any definite conclusions, but never getting bored with it, either.
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 24
    Text - Meanwhile, Roger, while playing racquetball one day with a mutual friend of his and Elaine's, will pause just before serving, frown, and say: "Norm, did Elaine ever own a horse?"
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"
  • 25
    Text - And that's the difference between men and women ~ Dave Barry
    via Dave Barry "Complete Guide To Guys"

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