19 Funny Tweets That Prove 4 Year Olds Are Full of Whimsy and/or Psychopathy

Author image for Eric Lund
Eric Lund
Dec 8, 2018 6:00 PM EST

4 year olds are brimming with creativity, wonder, and the ability to lie through their little teeth for personal gain.

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  • 01
    Text - Kendy Crush @KennedyConnolly 4yo running around outside in full Batman regalia Me: "you can't be out in the rain at this time of night" 4yo [exasperated] "THIS CITY NEEDS ME, JESUS CHRIST!" 538 7:46 PM - Jun 13, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 02
    Text - Creed @chemical_scum My 4yo is playing pretend with his dinosaurs and the daddy dinosaur just constantly says "I'm old let me rest." 172 4:39 AM - Jun 14, 2018
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  • 03
    Text - Laura Pearson @LauraPAuthor 4yo's doing some magic. 4yo: Did you see me put that ball under that hat? Me: Yes. 4yo: Try to forget. 1,530 3:09 PM - Jun 3, 2018
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  • 04
    Text - Jess Calarco @JessicaCalarco 4yo: Can you read me one more book? Me: No kiddo, it's time for bed. 4yo: But I'm a curious woman. And reading books helps me learn things and be smarter. Don't you want me to learn things and be smarter? 588 1:04 AM Dec 2, 2018
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  • 05
    Text - SpacedMom @copymama My 4yo just asked me if I was there when we went to Disney 6 weeks ago for 5 days, so I'm obviously making a huge impact in her life. 586 2:11 PM - Nov 7, 2017
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  • 06
    Text - Court @Discourt If you were wondering, when your 4 year old asks you if she can cut her hair, there's a 100% chance it's because she already did. 290 6:51 PM - Jul 6, 2016
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  • 07
    Text - "Bare Minimum Parenting" in bookstores now @XplodingUnicorn 4-year-old: Did you know you can put cheese on anything? Me: What? 4: *intense whisper* ANYTHING 7,072 6:33 PM Apr 19, 2017
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  • 08
    Text - Mike Reynolds @EverydayGirlDad 4yo: You're a good dad. Me: Thanks. 4yo: You'd be better if you said yes more. Me: Okay 4yo: Can I have ice cream? Think about what I said. 911 2:48 PM - Jun 20, 2016
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  • 09
    Text - Chutup @Chutup Replying to @chrissyteigen My 4 year old son asked me why I was putting on makeup and I said "To make me look pretty." He replied "I don't think it's working." 15.5K 2:37 AM Sep 23, 2017
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  • 10
    Text - Brian Wecht @bwecht Audrey (4yo) and I saw a big rainbow flag while in West Hollywood today. Audrey: Daddy, what's that? Me: A rainbow flag. It reminds us that there are lots of different kinds of people in the world & that we should love everyone. Audrey: Well I already love everyone, so I WIN. 26K 2:55 AM-Aug 20, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 11
    Text - Jess Bleakley @JLBleakley Overheard my 4yo explaining 'barefoot' to her little sister: "we call this bare feet because we're not wearing shoes outside, just like bears." 640 4:13 PM - Jul 16, 2018
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  • 12
    Text - Andrew vG @tenwattandrew 4yo: *spills goldfish crackers on the floor* Me: please pick them up 4yo: but the doggy can do that Me:we dont have a dog 4yo: *patting 2yo bro on the head* "Nice doggy" 2,774 12:31 PM - Jun 9, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 13
    Text - Akemi Dawn Bowman @akemidawn Every morning my 4yo tells me it's a "blank day" because nothing good or bad has happened yet. At night, if anything remotely negative happened, she pretends to throw the memory into a garbage can to make room for more good memories. So basically she's already smarter than I am. 848 10:34 AM - Nov 26, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 14
    Text - The Acoustic Cop @acousticcop My 4 yr old daughter continues to ruin me.... Stood quietly in a que at the bank.... 4yo- "daddy has that lady got a big baby in her tummy?" *Fat man with long hair turns around and looks at her* 408 1:36 PM - Aug 10, 2018
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  • 15
    Text - Brian Wecht @bwecht Audrey (4yo): Daddy, what's 100 minus 1? Me: 99 Audrey: What's 40 million plus one? Me: 40,000,001 *10 seconds of stunned silence* Audrey: Wow daddy, you know a lot of math. 21.1K 6:45 PM Dec 2, 2018
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  • 16
    Text - Brian Wecht @bwecht Me: Audrey, what do you want to be when you grow up? Audrey (4yo): A music player, just like you! Me: Yay! Audrey: And I can play in your band! Me: Yes please! Audrey: And then when you die, I can take your place! Me: ... 22.9K 4:45 AM-Nov 12, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 17
    Text - boujie native @kloqowej My 4yo is playing in a large box. Me: "Is that your rocket ship? Your castle? Your voyaging boat?" 4yo: "Nope. It's my garbage can. I live in it." Dream big kid. 1,251 12:31 PM Nov 27, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 18
    Text - Caffeine, Chaos & Grace @cafchaosgrace 4 was laying on the dining room floor.. 2yo: Are you dead? 4yo: No, I'm not dead. I'm resting my feelings. 305 1:08 AM Nov 6, 2018
    via Miguenzo
  • 19
    Text - Ruth Owen @Brinestowen My 4yo has started using the word *fully* all the time: "I fully ate my lunch," "I am in my bed fully." The thing is, I have no idea where he picked it up He sounds like a little 19th century lordling. V186 1:35 PM- Nov 17, 2018
    via Miguenzo

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