Failbook

15 Humorous Dad Tweets to Remind You How Fun Being a Father Is

  • 1

    Always Keep a Mask Handy

    Text - Abe Yospe @Cheeseboy22 I wear a clown mask to sleep just in case one of my kids has a nightmare and comes to sleep in our bed RETWEETS LIKES 712 1,475
  • Advertisement
  • 2

    Just in Time

    Text - Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn finally gets the car seat installed correctly] Me: Where's the baby? Wife: In college. RETWEETS LIKES 2,371 4,702
  • 3

    Daddy's Little Hog Face

    Text - Danny Zuker @DannyZuker I'm constantly amazed at how different my twin daughters are. Lisa is so much more positive & confident than her sister Hog Face. RETWEETS LIKES 3,585 6,988
  • 4

    Ryan Reynolds Has Priorities

    Text - Ryan Reynolds @VancityReynolds I'd walk through fire for my daughter. Well not FIRE, because it's dangerous. But a super humid room. But not too humid, because my hair. RETWEETS LIKES 27,626 48,290
  • Advertisement
  • 5

    It's an Amazing Learning Experience

    Text - Brian Gaar @briangaar The best thing about trying to name a baby is realizing how many people you hate RETWEETS LIKES 10,741 3,769
  • 6

    ProTip

    Text - Svenn Amish @amishschool Wife said I should talk to the kids about drugs so I told them how faking a back injury would usually get you some Vicodin. RETWEETS LIKES 272 460
  • 7

    Equality

    Text - Rodney Lacroix @moooooog35 tare I'm coaching my son's soccer team because it's important that he knows l'll swear at other kids, too. RETWEETS LIKES 392 837
  • Advertisement
  • 8

    Parenting in a Nutshell

    Text - The Glad Stork @TheGladStork I cut the crust off my daughter's PB&J and I swear to god I heard her whisper that I'm her bitch now. RETWEETS LIKES 319 553
  • 9

    This One's Going on the Fridge!

    Text - Simon Holland @simoncholland It's weird how we tell kids not to lie then tell them how good the picture they drew is. RETWEETS LIKES 471 1,058
  • 10

    The Everything Baby

    Text - The Cisco Kid @TheCiscoKidder I knew it was time to vacuum when the baby rolled over and looked like an everything bagel. RETWEETS LIKES 1,057 2,084
  • Advertisement
  • 11

    Go Ask Your Mother

    Text - Will Rodgers @WilliamRodgers 3 year old: What's neglect mean? Me: Shhh daddy's playing video games. RETWEETS LIKES 988 443
  • 12

    "At My Parenting Best"

    Text - Dad and Buried @DadandBuried I'm at my parenting best when I randomly yell out "be careful!" every few minutes without looking up from my phone. RETWEETS LIKES 2,457 3,671
  • 13

    Baby Genius

    Text - Zack @Mr Kapowski 7 y/o daughter: Why don't they have tape for your burrito but you could eat the tape? And now I know what Einstein's parents felt like. RETWEETS LIKES 1,079 2,106
  • Advertisement
  • 14

    Almost to the Good Part

    Text - Justin Guarini @JustinGuarini Hang on guys, I think my toddler is getting to the good part of his four hour long story and I don't want to miss it LIKES RETWEETS 215 601
  • 15

    One Is Always More Gifted Than the Other

    Text - New Eric @ericsshadow My youngest is being tested for the gifted program at his elementary school and my other son thinks his toothbrush is haunted RETWEETS LIKES 758 2,104

Tags

Next on Failbook

Comments