Invention of the Day: Never Go Anywhere Without Your Pizza with this Helpful, Stupid Pouch

Have you ever been just hanging out and had an immediate urge for a cold, stale slice of pizza that you have to remove from a plastic pouch?

Have you ever wanted an edible necklace of old pizza?

Have you ever wanted other people to know that you have an uncontrollable need for pizza and absolutely no patience?

No. The answer to all of these questions is 'no'.



But still, if you want to buy a pizza pouch, you have that option as a free, individual human.

As described on the website:

No one should ever be without pizza. Sadly, (often tragically) pizza is not always available for immediate hand-to-mouth consumption. Prepare yourself. Keep and carry a backup slice with this specially designed Pizza Pouch. A durable zip-lock sealing neck-strap pie slice device. Always fresh and ready. BONUS: Just wearing this Pizza Pouch will instantly make you more popular and attractive. It's a bold (and delicious) fashion statement. Portable pizza. The best invention since delivery. * Please Note: Due to the sudden (understandable) popularity and limited stock on hand, these may not ship until October 18. Be patient. Be strong. They will come.

Seriously though, if you put a slice of pizza in that thing and it's even just a little bit warm, won't all the cheese and toppings pull off of it when you shove your greasy, greedy hand into it to dig it out?

I'm buying three.

One for me. One for a Christmas present. One as a spare for me.