Damoncord's Favorites

  • (My dad and I were having a post-Thanksgiving dinner farting contest. It was getting progressivel...
  • When sexting your girlfriend about groping her chest, never, i mean NEVER, call her boobs her "ch...
  • If you leave the hanging of ornaments entirely to the kids, prepare to wind up with a beautiful t...
  • If you are a Vocaloid fan and have "Dark Woods Circus" on your iPod, for the love of all that is ...
  • When cutting bread, cut away from yourself, it will be hard to explain the serrated knife jutting...
  • SAFETY TIP: It's not a good idea to store your tube of Super Glue in the nightstand next to your ...

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