DeadEyeDog

This is my dad's favorite thing to say when I have a friend in the car with us. It varies from t...

*talking to me about sex* Grandma: You know, my first time with your grandpa sounded like "plok ...

*A kid in my class yelling violently* Kid: Shut up, you douchebag!!! Mom: Do you know what a do...

me: *sitting with my friends at Starbucks after school, none of them had ever met my dad before* ...

*sitting at home having beer with my parents* Dad: come here *does the notion with the finger to...