Mom (teaching me how to drive): Make sure you don't run over any boxes or bags. Me: Why? Mom: T...
(While my dad was driving me to my boyfriends house) Me: We are too early, I want to be right o...
(Mom, carrying a broom after she was sweeping the porch): Guess what I was doing? Dad: Going f...
(Dad filling out a medical form for me, gets to date of birth and gives me a blank stare.) Me: O...
Me (Coming home from work in the afternoon) Dad: Lily!! What have you done to my carpet? I've tr...
(My Mom and I are at the bank. Mom walks up to the bank manager.) Manager: How can I help you to...
(Dad is making repairs at my apartment and I'm helping.) Dad: Here, hold this (puts something in...
Me: You know, it's because of moments like this I think I'm adopted. Dad: Well, when you find yo...
(My Mom putting the hamster cage in the car) Me: Mom, why are you putting a seatbelt on the Hams...
Mom: Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
(Dad accidentally sits down on my brother's right arm) Me: Careful, Dad, that's his wanking hand...