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The locals would be up in a couple of hours, and the whole "dogs chase cats" charade would have to be played out anew. It was a living.

Meno*PAWS*

So far the automatic junk mail shredder has disposed of three pre-approved credit card offers, a tax refund check, and the mailman's knuckles.

But First, The Bread!

Beware of purrantulas that may have stowed away during shipping.

I has WMDs Weapons of mouse destruction

Balance fail... ...becomes chin-scratch win

RESERVOIR MOGS

... it mocked me ...

Kittehz Wurdz uv Wizdum

...stealthy...like a silent shadow...like a passing cloud...like...

Dawg sed ai nut gud enuff lolcat fur frunt paeg

TARGET SIGHTED: DARK COAT, LOOKS BRAND NEWPREPARING TO DROP LOAD

All this praise is gonna ruin my carefully-constructed facade of humility.

Knight Kitty levels up! Selecting New Class: Dolphin Rider

Why no, dear. There was nothing in the tea. It was in the brownies.