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Scorpion Escapes Tank, Panicked Hunt Ensues

The idea of having 25 tarantulas as pets in your home might send a pure and icy shot of chills down your spine, but for some folks, tarantulas are nothing short of adorable. On top of that, this particular pet owner also had a pet scorpion. As it turns out, that pet scorpion had a bit of a moment where it was able to break free from its living quarters, and apparently had ended up posting up right where its owner was going to lay her head for sleep. Just imagining a scorpion running across your face is enough to make the idea of sleep seem like a wildly unrealistic pursuit. Like, no thank you. 

A scorpion escapes its tank, and then a panicked hunt around the house ensues.
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Sarcastic Dads Who Are Done With Parenting

We've just celebrated Father's Day, where we give dads the credit they deserve for raising their kids as best they can. But every day, fathers struggle through the parenting journey, and sometimes, dad humor is the only way they can preserve their sanity in the process. We celebrate these dads every week because their despair is utterly relatable for anyone raising kids, and we love to laugh at their expense. Check out these hilariously sarcastic tweets from dads who are hanging on by a thread, and then head on over to last week's funniest dad tweets for more dad humor.



Funniest Tweets From Dads Who Nailed Parenting This Week | Thumbnail text - NicholasG ... @Dad_At_Law So glad to be able to spend hard-earned money at restaurants again so my daughter can say things like, "This shrimp isn't as good as the popcorn shrimp at school. I think it has real shrimp in it." 3:49 PM · Jun 21, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 21 Retweets 45 Likes
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Smug Mother Says Racist Slur Repeatedly In Front Of Half-Black Daughter

Intermarriage is much more common than it used to be, and it's a wonderful thing that it has become normalized in society. However, it can be really difficult for parents to understand that their mixed children may experience a completely different upbringing than their own. It doesn't mean they should be treated any differently, but it means they probably have developed much thicker skin than one of their parents would ever require. They probably face more adversity and for that reason, their parents should be even more empathetic to them. However not every parent possesses that level of compassion, and it shows.

Smug Mother Says Racist Slur Repeatedly In Front Of Half-Black Daughter| thumbnail text - r/AmltheAsshole u/kittenmink • 15h 2 3 1 AITA for not giving in to my racist mother?
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Iconic Father's Day Tweets From Dads Who Deserve A Raise, Or At Least A Long Nap

Father's Day is upon us once again. This year is basically guaranteed to be better than the last due to... obvious reasons. Luckily there are many more options if you're looking for a fun place to take your old man. Don't ask us what to buy him though, it has (un)officially been decided that dads are the hardest people to buy gifts for — a close second being older brothers. How many ties can a man possibly own after all? 

Iconic Father's Day Tweets From Dads Who Deserve A Raise| thumbnail text - Jim Gaffigan @JimGaffigan My 4 yr old son gave me a hand made card for Father's Day. Maybe for Christmas l'll draw him a picture of some toys. 11:53 AM · Jun 20, 2010 · Twitter Web Client 2.1K Retweets 3.2K Likes
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Sarcastic Tweets From Parents Who Are Totally Done With Parenting

If you're a parent, then congratulations on making another week of keeping your kids alive. Parenting is full of moments that make you want to laugh, cry, jump off a cliff, and everything in between. Unfortunately, no one hands out parenting medals. so Twitter is an excellent place to get the appreciation, empathy, and cheerleading that you need to keep you going for another week of parenting. Welcome to this week's funniest parenting tweets, which, as usual, are as relatable as they are hilarious. Oh, and here's last week's in case you missed them.




sarcastic tweets from parents who are so over parenting | thumbnail text - Katia Lévy ... @Frenchbiche What wine pairs well with a teenager who knows everything and is always right? 6:01 AM · Jun 7, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 518 Retweets 334 Quote Tweets 8,920 Likes
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Teen Driver Forces Parents Hand On Stupid Rule, Actually Wins

It sucks to find yourself on the receiving end of a stupid rule, especially when it's an overzealous parenting decision. It's rare, but sometimes teens find a way to turn the tables, like this kid who rented out his stepmom's house after giving away his PS4. At least the parents ended up admitting defeat. When people can't see reason, it forces others to take stock of the power they have over a situation, like this dude who fought back when a store owner wouldn't change his phone number.

teen driver told they can't go anywhere without permission, so he forces parents hand
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Men Who Got Super Sassy About Pregnancy And Pissed Off Their Wives

We can't imagine having a pregnant wife is easy because you have to deal with the hormones, the stress, and the responsibility of getting them through the pregnancy. But being pregnant is even harder, so the sympathy for partners is somewhat limited. These men think they've got it so tough having a pregnant wife and have resorted to being smart asses to cope with it. Three guesses as to whether or not their wives appreciate their sass? Yep, you got it. They don't! These tweets from dads-to-be prove that it's never too early to start with the dad humor.



funny tweets from men about pregnancy who pissed off their wives | thumbnail text - Will Rodgers ... @WilliamRodgers PRO TIP When your angry, hungry, hormonal, pregnant, wife asks you, "Where do you want to eat?" "I dunno, probably separate rooms.." Is NOT the right answer... 4:20 AM · Sep 14, 2019 · Twitter for iPhone 69 Retweets 5 Quote Tweets 414 Likes
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Pettiest Things Parents Did To Their Kids

Parenting is all fun and games until your kids drive you so crazy that you want to kill them. So sometimes, getting even is the perfect revenge you need on your kids to make yourself feel better about whatever they're doing to you. Parenting is all about protecting your sanity, whatever the cost, right? These parents know how to get petty with their kids, not be embarrassed about it, and even shamefully brag about it on Twitter. Enjoy these tweets from parents who have no qualms about winning at parenting.



pettiest things parents did to their kids | thumbnail text - Simon Holland ... @simoncholland It may be petty but if my kid wakes me up one more Sunday before 5 AM, I'm taking the straw off her juice box when I pack her lunch. 3:22 PM · Jan 7, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 33 Retweets 2 Quote Tweets 731 Likes
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Entitled Mom Expects Sister To Watch Her Kids Every Time She Runs To A New Hookup

One of the best parts of having a big family when you start having kids is all of the help and support you can receive. Single mothers could especially benefit from a helping hand every once in a while. It's normal to ask for help but to demand or expect it unconditionally sounds more like entitlement. Everybody has their own life and it is not fair to constantly put people in compromising positions just because you feel overwhelmed.

Entitled Mom Expects Sister To Watch Her Kids Every Time She Runs To A New Hookup| thumbnail text - r/AmltheAsshole u/TakeOnMeTakeMeHigh · 1d AITA for refusing to babysit for my sister? Not the A-hole
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Dads Who Are Lowkey Sick Of Their Kids

It's almost Father's Day, which means it's time to celebrate all the dads out there and all the incredible work they do raising their kids. But instead of being all sentimental and cute about it, we thought we'd acknowledge the less wholesome moments of parenting that dads endure daily. Anyone with kids knows how most days feel like losing a never-ending battle, so to all the dads out there just doing their best—and by best, we mean trying not to kill their kids—we acknowledge you, appreciate you, and love you. Here are some of the funniest dad tweets we saw this week from dads who are just trying to hold it together.






funniest dad tweets of the week | Thumbnail text - Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix If it's Sunday night and you're not just finding out about a school project that's due tomorrow are you really even a parent? 3:21 AM Jun 14, 2021 · Twitter for iPad
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Memes That Accurately Describe The Hell Of Raising Teenagers

Parenting is hard at the best of times, but raising teenagers is a whole new ballgame. From fending off their mood swings to keeping up with their appetites —which are big enough to feed a small country— it's certainly an uphill battle most days. These memes accurately sum up the trials and tribulations of raising teenagers and the strength of mind and character required to get you through to the parenting finish line.

funny memes about the hell of raising teenagers | thumbnail text - *Edgy teenager encountering the slightest inconvenience in life* I have decided that I want to die. katie rosman ... @katierosman How being a mother of a teenager started -> how being a mother of a teenager is going
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Twitter Thread: Best And Worst Advice That Dads Gave

With Father's Day right around the corner Jimmy Fallon decided to start up a Twitter thread that has people sharing the very best and absolute worst advice that they ever received from their dads. Even when the intentions are pure, sometimes the advice ends up being anything but good. Maybe some of these dads were just kidding around. You know, like they could've been telling their own kinds of dad jokes that just ended up completely missing their mark. Speaking of dad jokes, check out these punny dad jokes that outpunned themselves

A funny Twitter thread about the best and worst advice that people ever received from their dads.
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Spoiled Son 'Disgusted' When Uncle Gifts Him An Android, Says He Refuses To Be Seen With It

Kids get all kinds of gadgets these days much quicker than they used to. It's kind of insane how pre-pubescent teens, children, even some toddlers have constant access to the internet, but that's the direction the world is going in we guess. There's not much you can really do as a parent to avoid it. You can either decide to raise your child without any electronics and then have them become envious of their friends or get them an iPad early on and supply them with an even shorter attention span for life. All you can really do is make it clear to them that it is a privilege to have such things, so they don't start expecting more and more.

Spoiled Son 'Disgusted' When Uncle Gifts Him An Android, Says He Refuses To Be Seen With it| thumbnail text -
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Son With Heroic Willpower Outsmarts Parents' Sticker System

When trained the mind can be a beautiful instrument. Even without the training it's as if some of us are born with a bit more willpower than others. Sometimes that willpower can end up showing itself at a very young age. Especially during those toddler years that are already susceptible to all kinds of tomfoolery. There's something about kids during those years where they just can't be bothered to give a dang. This kid certainly showed off some impressive willpower. They're clearly going places. 

Son with a heroic level of willpower ends up outsmarting parent's sticker system.
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23 Funny Instances Of Kids Being Dumb

Some of us may not want to remember the dumb things we would do as children. Whether it was peeing into the vents of the family home (Sorry, mom) or harboring the thought that women don't poop, kids really are apt to doing (and thinking) the darndest things. The r/KidsAreFuckingStupid subreddit is full of these sorts of anecdotes, submitted by people who are marveling at their own childhood stupidity, frustrated and bemused parents, and people who may have seen a tweet they couldn't help but share. And we've got a bunch of the forum's best tidbits right here to share with you. 

Funny stories of kids being stupid, stupid kids, parenting, parenting tweets, childhood stupidity | always told people met Michael Jackson But now found picture, Maann wtf Who fuck this | Philip "Not Daddy" DeFranco @PhillyD Oh good. My son put my wireless headphones plastic container water keep them safe. good good good good good good good good good good great fine wonderful
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Sarcastic Tweets From Parents Who Are Done With Parenting

They say having kids is the most rewarding thing you can do. But when you haven't slept in three years, you have spit up in your hair, and you can't even go to the bathroom without a tiny human following you, it's easy to forget why you became a parent in the first place. To all the parents out there who are losing their minds, humor might be the only thing left that will preserve your sanity, and luckily, you aren't alone. The funny parents of Twitter use sarcasm, sass, and wit to get through the trials and tribulations of parenting, and they are here for you. Welcome to this week's funniest parenting tweets, which will make you laugh, relate or roll your eyes.




funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - That Mom Tho ... @mom_tho my kid can't remember where her shoes are but remembers that 13 months ago i said maybe i would take her to see micky mouse for her fifth birthday which is of course in two weeks and of course we are not going 4:17 PM · Jun 5, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 94 Retweets 1 Quote Tweet 822 Likes
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