Memes 'N Tweets To Ward Off Disillusionment

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    Text - the only ESSENTIAL OIL I trust is WD-40 WD-40 NEVER LOSE THE STR • Stops Sque Remaves & Pr T STRAW MART STRAW ARTS RA STAAN AMAN canbe ted Parts Acinms Protecte Mech sture DER P RACHOF CARLOREN Loosens Rusted Parts Removes & Protects * Stops Squeaks EVER LO TRAW AG hanisms DIS18NS ART SIRAR WD-40 SMART ST Squegke omoves & Protecta Rusted Parts Stiaky Mechan Grives Out Maistu
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    Text - Abby Jimenez @AbbyJimenez763 STRANGER: Hey, is that guy bothering you? ME: Yeah, but he's my husband so I signed up for this.
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    Text - Robert McNees @mcnees The 6yo figured out she can sneakily stick a note on someone's back. But she doesn't know they should say things like "kick me," so they just have space facts on them. 14:14 16 Dec. 18 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - bananafanafofisa @lisaxy424 When I was a kid: why do athletes retire in their 30s they're still so young Me in my 30s now: *trying to get up from a couch* yep ok
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    Text - Vickie Roark @seven4liberty I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes; now I have Heinzsight. 7:17 AM · 14 Oct 19 · Twitter for iPhone 1,153 Retweets 4,401 Likes
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    Text - Alyssa Limperis @alyssalimp Tjust took a DNA test turns out now the government has my DNA
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    Food - nicole tersigni @nicsigni recipe: 2 cloves of garlic me: got it
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    Brass instrument - Picard plays a Ressikan flute. The last vestige of an alien culture, it has a gentle and calming sound, reflecting Picard's own skills as a diplomat and his fascination with other cultures. Data plays a violin, an instrument that is difficult to learn and harder to master. It requires mathemati- cal precision, but also heart, reflecting Data's quest to be more than the sum of his components. Riker plays a trombone.
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    Text - snowflakeeel I chime in with a haven't you people ever heard of citing a goddamn source??" nitrostreak No It's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of Smug irrationality
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    Product - Say it's ain't so, I will not go turn the lights off, carry me home NAN NA NA NE NN NANANAJAN NN HA NA NA NA NA NANAN N NNANN NNA N NNNH NNNE NE AR AR AR NA NNA NANAN NA N N NA N NA NAN VNNI NNANANA NA NA NA NA NA NA NANAINANA NA NA NINNA M A N NANAN
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    Text - ellie @holy_schnitt you know why people overshare on the internet? because it's like screaming into the void plus validation. like if the void was like yoooo00 I feel that to0000000
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    Cup - "Maybe this coffee will help me be more productive" Coffee: @sonnySideup
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    Text - * mysterymanbob sad story friend did a crappy torrent of norton antivirus, the program successfully detected itself as a threat and deleted itself during a scan
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    Text - blaine capatch @blainecapatch domo arigato Closed Mango VEGAN GELATO 08:47 · 11 gen 19 · Twitter Lite
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    Cartoon - Candice Follow @spinnellii funniest thing i've seen today Vicks is just spicy Vaseline
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    Text - t7 You Retweeted Ally @TragicAllyHere Sorry if l'm not your cup of tea. I'm not even my own cup of tea. I'm barely a cup and I don't like tea. I'm more like a rusty bucket of haunted bog water. Sorry if I'm not your rusty bucket of haunted bog water. 3:51 PM · 10/9/19 Twitter for iPhone 1,510 Retweets 5,377 Likes
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    Text - When you ask Jesus if he knows God. -Well, of course I know him. He's me.
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    Brain - "un-christian" "heretic" %3D "SAIN'T"
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    Motor vehicle - ME: God, give me more patience GOD: @EMMANUEL0777
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    Face - Me during a titration lab:
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    Face - ME TRYING TO RAISE DECENT HUMANS, MAINT AIN A HOUSEHOLD, KEEP MY HUSBAND HAPPY, HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE, AND NOT LOSE MY SHIT. @MUMMIES&DADDIES
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    Text - ruby @roobeekeane · 1d [at a gender reveal party] Karen: so blue smoke means itť's a boy, and pink smoke means it's a girl me: everyone ready? guests: three, two, one...! [white smoke emerges from the chimney] me: just as I thought, it's a new Pope 27 2,728 23 18.4K
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    Text - katrina and the diamonds Follow @goslingtrain honestly i have the PERFECT italian renaissance bod right now and i'm so mad at y'all for changing the ideal feminine form on me. titian would have WORSHIPPED me okay. botticelli would be all up in my dms 7:16 PM - 19 Jul 2018 5,513 Retweets 20,314 Likes t7 5.5K 32 20K
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    Sky - 100°C 100°F
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    Cat - What my french fries see when im driving home
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    Arm - Me: *falls asleep on arm* blood cells: Let me in. (aduct swing LET ME IIIIN IN! (adult swin
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    Facial expression - When you shoot your shot with a girl way out of your league and it actually works
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    Photography
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    Canidae - glumshoe What I say: "I'm touch-starved." What you think I mean: "I need a hug." What I truly mean: "I need someone to platonically lie across me with their full weight, crushing my body and providing deep pressure until my errant soul is reabsorbed into my flesh. Also, a hug would be nice." glumshoe I've had to explain this to people who think it's weird, but when I add, "You know... like cats..." they seem to understand.
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    Movie - When someone is tryna cut in traffic HOLD THE LINE!!
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    Cartoon - 2009 2019
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    Text - @turtlekiosk self care is officially over we're doing drugs again 6:39 PM · 5/17/19 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - iamfuckingweeping: non-binary-sally-bowles: You've been hit by O You've been struck by 8 A Roman Senator CAESER ARE YOU OKAY ARE YOU OKAY CEASER
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    Text - kate @kaiteasley maybe she's born with it maybe she needs cognitive behavioral therapy 19/11/18, 3:23 pm 8,545 Retweets 41K Likes
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    Mammal - If Jim Henson designed actual sheep
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    Tortoise - Interviewer: Do you have any special talents? Me: @TheintrovertedMommy

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