Woman Emasculates Egotistical Boyfriend

Author image for mattstaff
mattstaff
May 19, 2020 1:00 PM EDT

Man, oh, man, it sounds like this dude was really on one. He was talking the talk, and when it came down to it, was most certainly not able to walk the walk. Looking at the full picture, it would seem that both the boyfriend and girlfriend's egos were flared up. For him, he was walking around with his chest puffed out, making all kinds of assumptions about a strength he had over someone else, and for her, well maybe the fact that she took the bait and brought him to the gym to "prove" her strength. Maybe the move was to just let it roll off the back. But oh well, here we are with quite the absurd meltdown. 

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  • 01
    Text - Text - 1 W1 1 3 1 2 AITA for emasculating my BF? Not the A-hole | (30F) met this guy (28M) in January and he became my BF in February. Comes March, the world goes down the drain and we decided to move in together for the time of the pandemic. Everything is great. In the morning, we have this routine where he browses Reddit and gives me the highlights. A few weeks ago, he shows me a post where this guy is challenged to an arm wrestling competition by his GF. The guy didn't seem to have any
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 02
    Text - Text - I commented he might have a surprise. My BF started educating me on biology and how men are stronger than women. I told him there were way too many factors to take into consideration to make such a broad comment. I have been doing weightlifting for 2 years and my BF has never seen a gym in his life, so I used us as an example. That was a BIG mistake. He got really defensive and condescending, and made comments like "That's cute." I just let it go. Fast forward to yesterday. He's pl
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 03
    Text - Text - At first it's all pretty and my ego is bursting, but then he says I'm delusional because I think I'm stronger than him. Pause. "Seriously? I know I'm weak but not weaker than a girl." So later, I decide to call him on his BS. I asked him if he wanted to come workout with me the next day (this morning) so he can show me how strong he is. He accepted and I was happy because I had been dying to bring him and initiate him to something I'm passionate about. So, this morning, we went to
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  • 04
    Text - Text - My friend was there cause he corrects my form and it's been our Sunday ritual since Covid-19. We started light and slowly worked our way up, doing the same number of reps as the other. Comes 185, his form starts to crumble so we made him go lighter. But 185 really isn't that much for me so I kept stacking the plates. He looked very supportive and impressed the whole time. I ended up beating my personal best at 265. I was ecstatic and so were they. When we got in the car, he was ver
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  • 05
    Text - Text - I started collecting my things, but now I'm wondering if I should have been reading between the lines and stopped at 190 or something. Or just dropped it and never suggested we workout together? I knew very well I was stronger than him but I just had to prove it to him. AITA? Update: I still didnt get a word of him but since some of you asked, I will make sure to update you when he does. Thank you for the overwhelming response. That was a bit of a rollercoaster day but it made it e
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  • 06
    Text - Text - VegaBruja81 • 1d 5 Awards I don't work out and I don't know what deadlifts are. But I know what deadweight is when I see it. NTA Edit: Thank you for my first award! 5.2k
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  • 07
    Text - Text - VegaBruja81 • 1d 5 Awards I don't work out and I don't know what deadlifts are. But I know what deadweight is when I see it. NTA Edit: Thank you for my first award! 5.2k ...
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  • 08
    Text - Text - lumimarja • 1d 1 Award NTA Your bf accepted the challenge and then got upset when you beat him. And then he insuted you by saying he somehow thought you were a less of a woman. Sounds like he has a poor self-esteem, is a sore loser and suffers from fragile masculinity.
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 09
    Text - Text - SashaTen86 • 1d • Partassipant [1] 3 2 Awards NTA. He's insecure, misogynistic, condescending and ridiculous. The fact that you even considered dumbing yourself down by pretending to max out at 190 just to protect his fragile masculinity it extremely sad. Never do that. 4.4k ...
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  • 10
    Text - Text - NTA Your bf is a misogynistic prick. Like, let's break down what happened here. -He starts off with sexist bullshit on how women can't be stronger than men. -When you rightfully try to educate him, he dismisses you and condescends. -He then, weeks later, starts talking shit about you to his friends. Shit that, let's remember, is based on his own factually incorrect misogynistic views. -When you prove him wrong, he instead of finally admitting it finds a way to make you proving him
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  • 11
    Text - Text - kanbaeru • 1d • Partassipant [2] NTA i cant believe he thought he could beat someone who's been lifting for 2 years, hopefully you opened his eyes a bit
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  • 12
    Text - Text - MOm033 • 1d • Partassipant [1] NTA, OP get out this relationship because your bf is immature as hell. Are you really telling me a grown man got upset because his girlfriend lifted more than him. What the actual fuck?
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  • 13
    Text - Text - Troi91 • 1d • Asshole Enthusiast [7] NTA Break up with this fragile child of a man.
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  • 14
    Text - Text - whyyallsodumb • 1d • Colo-rectal Surgeon [46] 14 Awards LOL.. this is hilarious and congrats on your personal best. You don't need a physically stronger man, but you definitely need an emotionally stronger man, because that's where your BF is weak. You shouldn't have apologized for being better at something you work at than he is. That's your only error here. He wanted to shit talk and brag when he didn't deserve it. Don't EVER make yourself less to placate the insecurity of anyone
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 15
    Text - Text - HypotheticalParallel • 1d • Pooperintendant [53] NTA Wtaf. Why should you dim how much you shine to protect his fragile male ego? You go girl, seriously that's amazing. I love deadlifts too, but I can't do that much. I know my bf would be ecstatic if I beat a personal record, even if it was heavier than he lifts. If he can't share in your passion and has the audacity to say that your prowess affects the way he sees you as a woman he is so not worth another minute of your time. Take
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 16
    Text - Text - ColorfulToes 1d 1 Award NTA. Girls and women have been self-limiting for waaaaay too long because of societal expectations and fragile male egos. Please never do less than you are capable of doing because of someone else's ego. Also, the whole concept of emasculation is stupid and is one of the reasons we deal with toxic masculinity. An emotionally healthy and secure man will celebrate your successes. Your BF is both sexist and insecure, and that is NOT attractive.
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 17
    Text - Text - disOrdered • 1d • Asshole Aficionado [11] NTA. I would have dumped him once he started spouting that "men are stronger than women" bullshit. More like their tantrums are stronger.
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  • 18
    Text - Text - SharpNectarine8 • 1d • Certified Proctologist [20] NTA. He seems really insecure and he seems jealous of you. You did nothing wrong. And how dare he say that you are "less of a woman now". OP, this guy is unsupportive of you and your hobbies; you deserve better.
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 19
    Text - Text - aallanson • 1d Omg this is so funny, no offense, love. But if your boyfriend can't handle you being able to deadlift more than him after he talks so much smack about "I might be weak but l'm not weaker than a girl" BS, then maybe you shouldn't be with someone like that. NTA btw I hope that you can get him to see how stupid he's being, or maybe part ways. I know it's hard but someone "thinking your less of a woman" because your strong, especially your boyfriend, a person who's suppo
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 20
    Text - Text - wander-to-wonder • 1d • Asshole Enthusiast [8] NTA. Not even close. Please do not let any man tell you that you are less of a woman because you are stronger than them. You worked hard to build up that muscle and your efforts deserve to be celebrated and encouraged by your boyfriend. He is putting you down because he is insecure and that isn't okay. If you think this criticism of you being better at him at something will end here, you are probably wrong.
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  • 21
    Text - Text - Wars4w • 1d • Asshole Aficionado [10] ΝΤΑ You attempted to explain it to him and he refused. He needed an example to understand. Men have a biological advantage...but that means dick if you don't use it. The fact that he doesn't consider you a women because you're stronger than him is very telling. In his mind either he's a women or you're not. Only thing l'd say is if you wanted him to enjoy and feel welcome in your hobby then you shouldn't have done it this way. Honestly though,
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  • 22
    Text - Text - Kiki200490 • 1d • Partassipant [3] NtA But your biggest mistake here was not making him do squats. Given that he doesn't work out and was trying to match you, his legs would be sore for days. Plus when he storms off, he'll do the little toddler wobble which makes the whole situation a lot funnier.
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  • 23
    Text - Text - Januarysadness • 1d NTA, if anything you're the AH for apologising because now he will think he was in the right. Tell him to work out more if he wants to stunt like that or stfu. And he has to AUDACITY to say he sees YOU as less of a woman if that is the case tell him you see him less of a man too.
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  • 24
    Text - Text - sciencenerdx • 1d • Partassipant [1] NTA He sounds like the kind of guy who wouldn't handle you making more money than him very well either.
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  • 25
    Text - Text - BullShitting24-7 • 1d NTA Your bf is a weenie and it has nothing to do with the lifting.
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  • 26
    Text - Text - lexashouldnthavedied • 1d NTA at all, your partner should be supportive of your accomplishments, not threatened by them. He obviously knows there's something wrong with his behaviour if he acted supportive of you around your friend and then showed his true colours when it was just you two. Also, he seems like an asshole for assuming all men are stronger than women.
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 27
    Text - Text - Silthinis • 1d NTA: Speaking as a male: if this is his response to you being able to deadlift more than him when this is something you've been working on for 2 years and he hasn't, then you're going to have other problems that just haven't become apparent yet. You being able to definitively show that you are stronger than him in any way is a threat to his idea of masculinity, and that is not your fault or responsibility to fix. Congrats on the new personal best, and definitely keep
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 28
    Text - CJsopinion • 1d NTA. What are you supposed to do? Pretend for the rest of your life that you're the weak and helpless lil woman? Screw that.
    via u/KindaNotSmart
  • 29
    Text - Shcooter78 • 1d NTA. This will be like if you two were married, you started making more money than him and he would try to get you to be a stay at home mom, cooking, cleaning and changing diapers. Really, you might have just found out that there isn't a future in this relationship.
    via u/KindaNotSmart

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