20 Relatable Truths For Mostly-Functioning Adults

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    Joint - Me: My back hurts, I wonder why My sleeping position:
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    Text - Him: hey that was nice! I had a good time :) Me: me too! Can we see each other again? Him:
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    Text - Anna M @helgagrace In my experience, adulthood is mostly piling stuff up on surfaces and then eventually having to clean off those surfaces 8:57 AM · 12/24/18 · Twitter for iPhone 2,346 Retweets 11.6K Likes
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    Text - Welcome to adulthood. You get mad when they rearrange the grocery store now
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    Text - It's funny how all the trust goes away when your looking for the remote "Are you sitting on the remote?" -"No" "Stand up"
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    Text - Does your life insurance know that you like being strangled during sex?
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    Product - rare-drop Scuttles into a pet store with no money Free Zo plopcior time 1dpcion de gaton
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    Text - FLOOR BABA I @FLOOR_BABA upper 20's life simulator: you are down to 6 friends. one no longer drinks due to an allergy thing. everyone's tired. you all work tomorrow 9/1/17, 5:59 PM
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    Text - Frankie Zelnick @phranqueigh Raise your hand if you've "literally wept" from stress at a job that paid you less than 40 grand a year The Age O @theage Former Westpac boss David Morgan says CEOS are "ridiculously overpaid" but the pressure of the job causes some to "literally weep" in private ow.ly/jtwh30nSCwq
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    Text - Amy Who? @amywhodigital Adulthood is just saying "if I can just get through this week" over and over again until you die.
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    Text - "How about we take this to the bedroom?" ..I whispered to my snacks
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    Text - WELL, THAT DIDN'T WORK An Autobiography
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    Text - Funny guys are dangerous. They make you laugh and laugh And laugh and laugh Then boom you're naked
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    Text - "Screw work" | say as I continue to turn up on time everyday. "You know what, I don't even care anymore" | say as I continue to work hard.
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    Product - Today's mood A CANDLE FOR IT'S ONLY FRICKIN' TUESDAY SMELLS LIKE SLOWLY DYING There's no way in hell l'm going to make it to Friday, people. @TaterThOtz
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    Text - Dylan Farella @dfarella I put the 'no' in 'l'll let you know'
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    Cartoon - When you have anxiety over something incredibly stupid and you know it's stupid but the anxiety won't go away
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    Text - Michael, still here @Home_Halfway [Does anything incorrectly] Well now I have to hate myself forever
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    Text - Simon Holland O @simoncholland We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it's fun to not be able to open that drawer. 2:17 PM · 8/15/17
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    Text - Him: tell me your wildest fantasy Me: 14 hours of sleep and then a buffet breakfast

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