Mother-In-Law Excludes Step-Grandkids From Family Photo Album

Author image for Eric Lund
Eric Lund
Jan 24, 2021 3:00 PM EST

Entering into a family has got to be weird, and it seems like grandma here hasn't exactly warmed up to the idea of having two extra grand kids. Is she deliberately being a jerk or is she unfairly being obligated to extend her grandmalyness to two new in-law grandchildren? The internet deliberated. Family politics can have big ramifications, like when this sister was uninvited from a wedding for her comments

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  • 01
    Text - Posted by u/Aita9190773 1 day ago O 2 3 e18 S 16 E 40 AITA For walking out with my girls when my MIL excluded them from family photo album? Not the A-hole I'm 36-mother of two girls (9/5) I met my now fiance (38) 2.5 years ago. He's a good man, Treats my girls well and loves them. future mother in law is a generous lady truth be told. His family are respectful and helpful. We visit them a lot. After we got engaged I pretty much considered this my extended family. However my mother in law
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  • 02
    Text - This week. My Future mother in law was doing family photo album and was gathering family pictures from everyone. SIL and her kids/brother in law and his kids and so on. She called and asked if I could send her some pictures. I thought that was nice of her. I sent them pretty much after my call with her ended. We were invited to her house. The entire family was there to look at the photo album bc it was complete. We took turns to look at it. And when it was mine and my girls turn I was stu
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  • 03
    Text - At home he told me that I really shouldn't have walked out before dinner and should've just ignored this whole thing because "Who cares about a stupid photo album?" I told him It's a symbol of family. the girls felt left out when all the kids pictures were there except for the girls although I sent her pics of 4 of us as a family. He said his mom didn't mean it and promised that This will change once we get married And said he'll "get everyone in line" so I shouldn't even consider this a
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  • 04
    Text - Mother in law called and was upset Saying me walking out like that was disrespectful to the entire family. When i told her about what she did . She bluntly said "I don't wanna lie to people those girls don't relate to me in any way" She said she loves them/ treat them well. Will host their birthdays "if I want" but she won't call them family. I argued with her over this and I hung up on her since she didn't think she did anything wrong. Was I in the wrong? Did I overreact?
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  • 05
    Text - loloannd Asshole Aficionado [12] 1 day ago PS 2 2 7 & 20 More Hooooboy. NTA. Pro tip: DON'T MARRY THIS MAN. Their behavior now won't change once you're married. Nothing will be different. Your girls will be excluded like this by his family forever.
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  • 06
    Text - Key-Tensio Partassipant [1] 1 day ago O NTA but your fiance will NOT have your back, and the treatment your daughters are getting now will only continue. I was in your daughters' shoes when I was a kid and my dad was getting remarried and thankfully we were accepted into the family events, photos, etc. by the time my dad was engaged to my stepmom.
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  • 07
    Text - towering_velveteen Partassipant [4] 1 day ago NTA! The real issue here is your fiancé's lack of a spine to stand up to his mother. That will probably never change, so you're walking into this coming marriage with your eyes wide open: If you marry this man, this will be your constant reality. Your daughters will continue to get ignored, and you will be pushed out of events. Cut your losses and flee this toxic relationship.
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  • 08
    Text - shorething99 Certified Proctologist [27] 1 day ago NTA. Your priority is your daughters and it is your obligation as their mother to stand by and up for them and protect them from anybody who is hurting them, physically or emotionally. It's exceptionally cruel to exclude children so young from gifts, trips, etc. Your fiance needs to speak to his mother because it's unfair to subject you and your children to that treatment the rest of your lives. You're either family or not.
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  • 09
    Text - Trick_Doughnut_6295 Partassipant [2] 1 day ago 2 NTA and I strongly suggest going no-contact with your in-laws until there is a promise of better behavior and an apology. What a cruel and entirely unnecessary thing to do to you and your young children. This woman has not been "forgetting" your girls, she's been deliberately excluding them. It's completely enraging. Your fiancé needs to step up and draw some really hard lines with his mother, and it needs to happen BEFORE the wedding.
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  • 10
    Text - eyespy_01 Asshole Aficionado [14] 1 day ago S NTA Do not marry into that family. he needs to get his mother straight before the wedding and if he can't then he needs to stay in solidarity with you and stop going to their events... Or don't marry him. Your daughters should never feel less then.
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  • 11
    Text - KoishiChan92 1 day ago INFO: I'm guessing MIL hasn't built a relationship with your daughters, how much do your kids hang out with her? I'm probably going to get downvoted for this, but familial bonds don't just magically appear and she's not obligated to spend money on your children. Purposely excluding them from the picture book is kinda shitty when you were included as well. If you really marry into the family she's gotta learn at some point that your children will be part of the famil
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  • 12
    Text - schnitzeldehuahua Partassipant [1] 1 day ago NTA & if you think this is a headache now, buckle up for the thrill ride when you have a biological child w/her son.
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  • 13
    Text - banerises19 Asshole Enthusiast [7] 1 day ago S To be honest, I kinda get her point. Have you given her a chance to bond with them? I don't have kids myself, but I understand that you're upset that your kids are excluded... But they have their own grandparents to include them in everything and spoil them... I wouldn't expect their step-grandparents to include them in everything they include their grandkids. I think it's more important how your fiance treats them, do you think he would trea
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  • 14
    Text - melodypowers 22 hours ago I am surprised my the comments on this post. I am a step daughter. My dad started living with his now-wife when I was 10. Married her when I was 12. I certainly didn't think my stepmother's mom was my grandmother before they were married. I didn't even consider my stepmother to be my stepmother before they were married. And I liked her just fine. But she was my dad's girlfriend. That was it. Her mom was my dad's girlfriend's mom. Not getting them cards or gifts f
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  • 15
    Text - dreamsuggestor Partassipant [1] 23 hours ago YTA you aren't even married.
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  • 16
    Text - theseanbeag 23 hours ago NAH. Your feelings are perfectly valid but she's only known you two years and probably knows them less. If she isn't comfortable treating them as family yet, that's her decision.
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