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A Collection of Creative Insults for Deserved Individuals

It never pays to be needlessly cruel to anyone, and in no way should these insults be used on innocent bystanders. No, this collection is for the deserving, those who cross you in more ways than you can count  and who's insolent presence violates ever fiber of your being. 

These insults are for the inconsiderate, the abominable, and the asinine and are a creative way to unleash your wrath upon them. The next time someone crosses you, you might actually be able to win the argument then and there instead of winning it in your head later while you're in the shower or in bed. 

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  • 1
    insults - Text - Guidewaal 5d The only way for you to get laid is to crawl up a chicken's ass and wait 3413
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  • 2
    insults - Text - You need to move on and forget me... How am I supposed to to forget you when everytime I go outside I see things that remind me of you like garbage bins and dog shit Delivered
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  • 3
    insults - Text - xoovanessaoox 5d You don't have a family tree, you have a family cactus because they're all pricks. 1050
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  • 4
    insults - Chin - luse small words so that you'll be sure to understand you warthog-faced bafoon!
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  • 5
    insults - Text - Destroyoptimus 5d My math teacher used to say, "You are so lazy, you are going to marry a pregnant woman." That stuck with me... Still lazy. 6256
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  • 6
    insults - Movie - I'm guessing you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling.
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  • 7
    insults - Text - TheFuturelsRenewable 5d "Does your ass get jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth?" 1441
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  • 8
    insults - Text - olioster 5d "Who is this clown?" cause not only are you calling him a clown but also one of the lesser known clowns. 6948
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  • 9
    insults - Text - daevas_dantanian 5d "you're the dollar menu version of your father" 2572
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  • 10
    insults - Photo caption - YOU UTTER... YOU...YOU COCK
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  • 11
    insults - Text - Webbythunder499 5d "You look like someone hit 'random' on the Skyrim character customization" 1318
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  • 12
    insults - Text - netherlandsg 5d Why are you playing so hard to get when you're already hard to want 7264
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  • 13
    insults - Cartoon - You piece of poo poo
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  • 14
    insults - Text - eggre 5d "You are impossible to underestimate." 5313
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  • 15
    insults - Mouth - This table just told me you're a douche
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  • 16
    insults - Text - SansGray 5d You're a complete tool but not half as useful 2118
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  • 17
    insults - Blond - Why don't you shut your mustache?
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  • 18
    insults - Text - eggre 5d From another thread: A friend of mine posted a picture of one of our coworkers in the Navy, and said "roast me." The top comment was "The only thing your mother wants for Christmas is a folded flag." 7973
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  • 19
    insults - Black
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  • 20
    insults - Text - tst3c 5d If you were any more inbred you'd be a sandwich 5710
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  • 21
    insults - Horse - and screw u in particular my good sir
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  • 22
    insults - Text - Lytebyrd 5d "I'm glad your dad beat you instead of cancer." 6159
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  • 23
    insults - Music - AURCTER MHEA You're a stupid, short-sighted, little prat.
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  • 24
    insults - Text - ifthisaintme 5d "I would unplug your life support to charge my phone." 4228
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  • 25
    insults - Text - signu1230 5d I personally love "you overdeveloped cumshot." 1292
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  • 26
    insults - Chin - Why are yousuchastupid head?
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  • 27
    insults - Text - TheMechanicalSloth 5d your birth certificate is an apology note from the condom factory 461
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  • 28
    insults - Food - May all your bacon burn.
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  • 29
    insults - Text - Watermelon_Duck 5d You're so ugly, your portraits hang themselves. 2602
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  • 30
    insults - Text - Wolverine2121 5d I would ground you, but you never go anywhere. My dad to me when I was failing Chemistry in high school. 993
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  • 31
    insults - Forehead - FUCK YOU! AND YOUR EYEBROWS!
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  • 32
    insults - Text - Musical_Muze 5d When playing any video game with bad teammates: "I'd call you cancer, but at least cancer can get kills." Edit: not sure how I feel about this being my new top comment. 4000
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  • 33
    insults - Text - ACBirnie 5d "I'd rather shit in my hands and clap" 1642
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  • 34
    insults - Text - DrewSuitor 21h If you looked any more inbred you'd have peanut butter and jelly on you
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  • 35
    insults - Photo caption - YOU'RE THE AT&T OFPEOPLE
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  • 36
    insults - Text - halfrican14 21h Sol have five siblings. My good friend, who is adopted, was joking around with my 6 year old brother and said "there's too many of you Johnsons running around." My brother, without missing a beat, said "there's too many of you adopted kids too". Friend's face was priceless and my bro just walked off casually.
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  • 37
    insults - Text - Merry_Pippins 23h "Yeah?! Well, you are in your 30's!!" -My son, in a fit of very accurate rage.
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  • 38
    insults - Text - Bwang321 22h When I was in 3rd grade some girl on the bus called me "Milk and cucumbers boy". I had no idea how to react.
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  • 39
    insults - Font - TWORLD WHY DONT YOU JUST GET IN YOUR ROCKET
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  • 40
    insults - Text - RufusOnslatt 21h "I would call you a cunt; but you lack the required depth and warmth" Malcolm Tucker
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  • 41
    insults - Movie - Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring.
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  • 42
    insults - Text - Noopyscroopsmcdoops 23h Said to me by my old boss about a coworker, "sometimes im surprised that dumb cunt remembers to breathe"
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  • 43
    insults - Facial expression - WE'RE ALL VICTIMS OF OUR OWN GENE PO0L SOMEONE MUST HAVE PEED IN YOURS.
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  • 44
    insults - Text - liquor_for_breakfast 22h Not sure if this fits here exactly, but two of my friends were verbally going at it, getting super pissed, one of them attempted to yell either "you wanna fucking go?!" or "you wanna fight?!" But rage threw off his speaking coherence so what came out was "Yeah? You wanna fuck?!" Cracked me up anyway
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  • 45
    insults - Text - kiky23 20h "Control your vagina goblins!" In all fairness the lady's kids were trying their hardest to destroy the store.
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  • 46
    insults - Text - CHIEF-KINT-VANNA 21h I overheard a kid tell his brother angrily: "I bet you can't even suck a dick!" 33
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  • 47
    insults - Male - Hey! Where did you get those clothes? At the. toilet...store?
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  • 48
    insults - Text - jimmyvcard 18h My highschool baseball coach asked me if i was conceived in the ass.
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  • 49
    insults - Photo caption - OFARTINYOUR GENERAL OIRECTION YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELT OF ELDERBERRIES
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  • 50
    insults - Text - BoundandBegging 20h My dad was arguing with his boss who has a beard(this guy is a true fucking dickhead, next level like) and so my dad turned to the guy next to them and said... "I'll set this fucker's beard alight and watch him slap himself to death." Then walked away
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  • 51
    insults - Fictional character - OHNOMATTHEW YOU'RE A LITTLE CUNT
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  • 52
    insults - Text - juanacape 21h One time my ma and I were having a huge fight and in the midst of all the anger and yelling, I turn to walk away and then suddenly look her in the eye and with a dead-serious face I scream "YOUR menstruation synched up to MINE. I AM THE ALPHA" which set off the saltiest, loudest "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?" I've ever heard in my life. PS- My brother nearly spit out his cereal with laughter since he was in the room with us
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  • 53
    insults - Human - Every time I think you hit a ceiling, you just keep raising the bar. You are like the Michael Jordan of being a son of a bitch. TrueDetectiveQuotes.com
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  • 54
    insults - Text - llovejuliastiles 21h My mate says this in defense and it makes me chuckle. "Shut up ya half a meat ball" Something about the recipient only being worthy of the title "half" a meatball gets me.
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  • 55
    insults - Text - ZeromusPrime 21h "If you look up gullible in the dictionary, you'll find a picture of you" "Yeah, well at least my dictionary doesn't have pictures, you fucking idiot" 4.2k
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  • 56
    insults - Text - Hovie1 21h Playing cards one night with friends. My new girlfriend was there. I got cleaned out by a friend. Me: "You fucker." Him: "You fuck her, you brought her!" Edit: Almost forgot the best part. Theyll be married 6 years in September.
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  • 57
    insults - Text - wolfpack518 18h Once while driving with my mom and older sister, I was being a typical younger brother and annoying the shit of my sister. She got pissed and told me I was adopted. I responded by saying "Yeah? Well at least mom and dad wanted me." Mom about wrecked the car from laughing so hard
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  • 58
    insults - Song - KICKASSGIFS Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.
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  • 59
    insults - Text - WadeWilsonforPope 23h Army friend has dropped "You better shut your cock holster"
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  • 60
    insults - Facial expression - I think the real mistake was when your father spotted your mother across a crowded swamp dragged her back to his hut, and made you. nplt
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