The workplace is inherently competitive. Even if you love your co-workers, there will always be some sight tension in the air when somebody mentions a raise, a promotion, or any exclusive opportunity that can only be given to a single employee. It's good to be a little competitive, and believe in yourself. Nobody gets a promotion by being shy and keeping to themself. But if you don't get that raise, or bonus, or whatever, it doesn't really give you a free pass to undermine someone else's accomplishment. Sure, when you're alone you can think about how annoyed you are that your efforts weren't rewarded in the same way, we all want to feel recognized. But at some point, you simply need to either let it go or quit. There's no reason for you to take out your anger on the person who got promoted, especially if you use their gender against them.
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