Husband Freaks Out When He Finds Out His Wife Borrows Breast Milk From A Friend

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Mayarey
Apr 5, 2022 6:00 PM EDT

There's only so much research somebody can do before becoming a parent. Sure you can go to lectures, and read books, and babysit your friends' kids, but we all know that there is nothing like the real thing. Just like the advice you give your kids in school, it's important to do your best, but it's also important to make mistakes and learn from them. As long as you are able to admit such mistakes, you should be just fine.

This guy clearly was caught off guard when he found out his wife shares breast milk with her friend. He finds it disgusting that his children are occasionally drinking someone else's milk. But really, maybe if he had done more research he would realize that that is a totally normal thing to do among new mothers in a plethora of cultures. We clearly have chosen a side, but you should let us know who you think is in the wrong here.

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  • 01
    Rectangle - r/AmltheAsshole u/aitathrowaway1983467 · 1d 1 1 A 1 AITA for telling my wife it's gross to feed our child breast milk that isn't hers?
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 02
    Smile - I've debated posting because this feels a bit too personal to me, this happed about a month and a half ago but we still aren't talking much (maybe once a week), she took the baby and moved back in with her parents.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 03
    Font - My(31M) wife(27F) and I lost our first child four years ago to SIDS. My wife never understood how that could be a thing and blamed it on the formula she was using. She tried breast feeding but could never produce enough so she switched to formula. Our little guy had a pretty sensitive stomach so we had tried nearly every formula, we finally found one that worked for him but unfortunately at 22 days old SIDS took him from us. My wife is still i'm therapy for this.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 04
    Font - Now we've welcomed our second child, also a boy. My wife always said she wasn't ready for another kid any time I asked, so it goes without saying that he wasn't planned.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 05
    Hair - During the pregnancy my wife only ate organic, nothing processed, no soda or coffee, and it was mostly raw veggies. She looked into what would make her produce more breast milk and tried to eat lots of things on that list.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 06
    Handwriting - After our son is born she won't let anybody come to the house, she makes me shower and wash up before I even get to see my son because she doesn't want outside germs inside. She's become obsessive with trying to keep our son from everything.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 07
    Font - One day I go to make him a bottle and can't find the formula, so I ask my wife. (this is the first bottle I would've made for him, my wife felt safer doing it herself) She says to use the little bags of milk in the freezer and explained the whole de-thawing and warming process because she got rid of our microwave so I had to heat water on the stove.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 08
    Font - I asked her if she was able to produce now why she didn't just breastfeed him, she said she wasn't able to, her friend produces too much for her two kids to be able to use so she gives some to my wife every week or so.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 09
    Font - I was disgusted. I told her it was nasty to use breast milk that wasn't hers, we don't know if this woman has diseases or anything. She assured me that it was safe and she asked her friend list of questions before, but I was having none of it. I took the breast milk out of the freezer and threw it away, I poured the water I had just heated onto it as well.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 10
    Hair - I left to go buy some formula and when I got back my wife and son were gone. After many many many calls she texted me and said they would be staying at her parents for the time being.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 11
    Smile - I told my friend about it and his girlfriend told me I was a massive pos, asshole, dick, and many other colorful worlds. I do feel bad, but I don't want my son drinking a random woman's breast milk.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 12
    Smile - OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I told my wife it was gross to use another woman's breast milk to feed our son.
    via u/aitathrowaway1983467
  • 13
    Font - AlwaysPlaysAHealer · 23h YTA. How did you pay so little attention to how your child was being fed that you didn't know this? And WHY, for the love of all things holy, would you throw away breast milk and go buy formula knowing your wife is convinced formula is why your first child died? Your wife is deeply troubled and needs help, that is not up for debate. But not for feeding donated breastmilk. You were an idiot and and asshole here bucko and need to apologize asap.
    via u/AlwaysPlaysAHealer
  • 14
    Product - witchbrew7 • 23h Partassipant [3] 1 Award Wetnurse was a profession. Feeding the baby someone else's breast milk was not wrong. Throwing out that breast milk was hugely wrong. It's a precious resource to anyone who knows. Both you and your wife seriously need therapy. ΥΤΑ. 5.8k ...
    via u/witchbrew7
  • 15
    Font - oldladymillenial · 1d Partassipant [1] 1 Award YTA. This is the freaking last thing the mother of your child needs: shit from a man who understands zero about motherhood. What's actually important is that your child is fed with good nutrition. second important thing would be that you support hat's it. End of sentence. A your wife. Also: do you drink milk, my dude? Because that's the equivalent of you drinking some strange woman's breast milk.
    via u/oldladymillenial
  • 16
    Font - kilothedefenestrator • 1d I told my friend about it and his girlfriend told me I was a massive pos, asshole, dick, and many other colorful worlds. She was right YTA 1.1k 3 ...
    via u/kilothedefenestrator

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