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47 Ridiculously Shameless Tinder Moments That Stepped on Typical Small Talk Ceremony

Yet again the wildly thirsty denizens of that crazy little thing called Tinder are here to remind us, the climate of modern day dating is dense with outlandishly thirsty, if not occasionally witty souls. These conversation moments in particular stuck out as memorable, and it shouldn't be any question as to why. 

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  • 1
    Text - Lauren Jan 2, 2017, 7:00 PM You seem like the kind of person who likes it rough from behind oh? Jan 2, 2017, 7:17 PM Am I wrong? not really #BUTTSTUFF2017?? ew So um #REGULARSTUFF2017??? Sent yes Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 2
    Text - Kobey YOU MATCHED WITH KOBEY ON 11/5/16 Hope size doesn't matter (length wise) (and width wise) but I've got a bubbling personality and I'm willing to muff dive. Hit me up playa. omg hi Looks like you caught wind of my bubbling personality. What's snapping at 3 AM?? just chillin in my sorority house yanno Sounds chill I'm in my mansion (apartment) with my bros watching Sportscenter (soft porn). I'm getting the feeling should hang out. we are you? Oh definitely. A girl willing to txt Send
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  • 3
    Text - Lucy YOU MATCHED WITH LUCY ON 12/7/16 I can already picture it. We're in our mid 40's. I wake up and you're cooking breakfast for our 2 children (both boys of course). You take them to school in your soccer mom car. I read the paper by the fireplace as I sip coffee and every now and then glance family photos and smile to myself. Our golden retriever named "goldy" is notorious for sitting patiently while we eat dinner so he can eat what the at our kids don't finish (even though you're pers
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  • 4
    Text - Susan YOU MATCHED WITH SUSAN ON 12/22/16 Can you touch me in the places Jerry Sandusky touched little boys? Sent I actually just laughed lol Only because you asked politely Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 5
    Text - Cohen YOU MATCHED WITH COHEN ON 8/25/16 Ever given road head in a $100,000 car? Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 6
    Text - Michael YOU MATCHED WITH MICHAEL ON 04/01/17 Is one of your pictures a picture of your arm in a cows ass? 4 Jan 2017, 7:12 PM Technically yes But my affinity to going elbow- deep in ass isn't exclusive to ruminants ;) Which reminds me, I'm working on a screenplay titled The Ruminant. It's about a cow that gets separated from the herd by a pack of wolves and left for dead, but ends up making it back to the dairy to everyone's surprise Sent Type a message... Send GIF
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  • 7
    Text - Lee YOU MATCHED WITH LEE ON 12/29/16 Can I pass you around like a blunt? Sent Type a Message... Send GIF 45 6 7 8 90 2 3 1 / $& ? ! #+= return ABC space X
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  • 8
    Text - Jared I'm glad my wit is recognized Wit and tit(s). A good combo I'm a triple threat. Wits, tits, and no gag reflex Did you just get me to pop a boner from 2874 miles away Jun 22, 2016, 1:02 AM If I didn't it's money back guaranteed Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 9
    Text - Maddie YOU MATCHED WITH MADDIE ON 12/28/16 Show me that turd cutter Was I unclear? Very odd name for it Is "balloon knot" more your speed? Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 10
    Text - Kiana YOU MATCHED WITH KIANA ON 9/16/16 Are you a toaster strudel? Because I'll nuke you for two minutes and cover you with my frosting Sent Nov 22, 2016, 2:13 PM Fuckkkk (; Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 11
    Text - Lynsey ww I Hey my mom thinks I'm gay can you help me prove her wrong? Nov 20, 2016, 8:42 PM Yeah, i'm down Nov 21, 2016, 7:36 PM You trying to sit on my face then? I guess if it'll help prove you're not gay Dec 2, 2016, 11:47 PM #? Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 12
    Text - Elizabeth YOU MATCHED WITH ELIZABETH ON 12/14/16 *licks finger and wipes on shirt* Let's get you out of these wet clothes Dec 15, 2016, 1:23 AM Surprise surprise I always wear a second outfit underneath in case of emergencies Dec 15, 2016, 3:50 AM I'll just have to resort to plan B then Dec 15, 2016, 9:31 AM And what's that? Roofies of course Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 13
    Product - Alyssa YOU MATCHED WITH ALYSSA ON 12/2/16 This is one of those nights where being a history major is going to be beneficial, cause I'm gonna motorboat you so so hard the titanic's gonna resurface ya nasty Raven Huh? Honey let me tell ya the future myself, it ain't nothin but my dick Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 14
    Text - Kaylynn YOU MATCHED WITH KAYLYNN ON 12/5/16 it all starts here Dec 6, 2016, 12:20 AM Haha did it tell you to say that. no?.. i was talking about the start of our children's life Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 15
    Text - Lauren YOU MATCHED WITH LAUREN ON 12/5/16 No amount of Native American protestors can stop me from laying pipe, know what I mean? Sent Type a Message... Send GIF Неу I'm W E O P R T YU A SD H JKL FG ZX C V B NM X 123 return space
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  • 16
    Text - Diana YOU MATCHED WITH DIANA ON 11/28/16 just saying hii Hey therr you replied :) hows your day going? Kinda shitty really wish I had some fruit i had a day off, store grabbing some fruit heh so im just at the You gonna fucking share? you been on tinder long?i decided to dl at last night Answer the fucking question Diana!! Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 17
    Text - Blythe Dec 2, 2016, 10:39 AM idk u have to tell me more lol Dec 2, 2016, 12:50 PM Ah describe myself? Well Have a winning personality and an Unbelievable smile. I also Get excited when I see puppies and Enjoy watching movies in bed. Don't think I'm worth it? I can see where you are Coming from but a Kiss might change your mind. Might be a secret message there btw idk Dec 2, 2016, 3:53 PM omg lol good that was Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 18
    Text - < Meg YOU MATCHED WITH MEG ON 1/3/17 Your name is Meg and I play soccer so can I put my balls between your legs? In other words can I get a nut, Meg? Jan 3, 2017, 11:24 PM Maybe that didn't work. I was really banking on that. Let me try something else Damn Meg I would give an arm and a leg to have your snap Sent Jan 4, 2017, 1:03 AM Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 19
    Text - Skye YOU MATCHED WITH SKYE ON 12/7/16 Can we just skip all the hello talk and come sit on my face? Sent deal Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 20
    Text - Haley It's gonna take more than that Liiiiikkkkeee? Send nudes and it's a deal. Lmao woo0OW That's how confidential it is. Haha.. just proving a point Sent Alright deal Type a Message... Send GIF R T O P W E YU GH KL A S D J ХсV В Z NM 123 return space (X L
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  • 21
    Text - Liam YOU MATCHED WITH LIAM ON 11/29/16 Are you from Tennessee? Cause eat ass iMessage
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  • 22
    Text - Nancy YOU MATCHED WITH NANCY ON 12/5/16 Hah, Jeez, was ugly starting to think I was Shut up I have been swiping for the last 25 minutes but mostly left's Haha. Shut the fuck up Soo.. what you doing today? Shut your fucking trap I'm just finishing up some homework, going to school to be a massage therapist. Nancy if you don't shut your stupid mouth l swear I'm gonna fuck it Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 23
    Text - Bailey Here is the riddle, mortals: What is this thing? It moves on 3 legs in the morning Two at noon And three at evening and puts one in you Dec 4, 2016, 11:41 AM An hombre Dec 4, 2016, 2:27 PM Haha you're pretty cool Dec 5, 2016, 3:20 AM Butt stuff? Sent Dec 5, 2016, 3:01 PM Nope, but you can fuck me from behind and pretend it's my ass Tell me what you want to do to me Be detailed Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 24
    Text - Kre YOU MATCHED WITH KRE ON 11/28/16 Girl, you make me Kream my jeans Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 25
    Text - Taylor YOU MATCHED WITH TAYLOR ON 11/28/16 Lemme add your dad LinkedIn Dec 1, 2016, 10:08 AM Ok! Haha l'll call him and give him a heads up and such but I'm sure he'd be fine with it
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  • 26
    Text - Alyssa I intend to make you beaver quiver in sensual anticipation with my alluring eyebrows. Also the carpets do not may h the drapes and I will bring true fire to our love making with my blazing fire crotch while watching the tellitubbies dirty sanchezing each other on a virtual reality system. This will be the most pleasurable experience you will every have, so come with me on a ride on my disco stick. Sent Hahahahahahaha hahha I'm dying Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 27
    Text - Lydia YOU MATCHED WITH LYDIA ON 10/18/16 Roses are red Violets are dumb Would you rather spit? Or swallow my cum? Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 28
    Text - Madeline It is for sure Lol Where u go? Dec 4, 2016, 7:30 AM Aum Dec 4, 2016, 9:48 AM Awesome do you like it Dec 4, 2016, 4:52 PM Yea Dec 4, 2016, 7:08 PM Sooo wanna bang? Dec 4, 2016, 8:40 PM Um nope Damn it Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 29
    Text - Summer YOU SUPER LIKED SUMMER ON 12/26/16 Cover me in dressing and toss me like a fucking Caesar Dec 26, 2016, 9:55 PM Hahahaha I like that one Shit idk what to say now This has never worked before Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 30
    Text - McKenzie YOU MATCHED WITH MCKENZIE ON 11/23/16 You seem to ride horses pretty well given you're an equestrian, but what about faces? Sent Dec 2, 2016, 12:42 PM I guess you could be the judge of that Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 31
    Text - Samantha YOU MATCHED WITH SAMANTHA ON 1/6/17 There's no "i" in Samantha, but there is a "man" and it should be "me." II Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 32
    Text - Ann YOU SUPER LIKED ANN ON 12/27/15 If I were a watermelon... would you spit or swallow my seeds Id swallow baby Iwanna fuck rn Please please Yeah lemme just go get a taco then I'll be over for yours Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 33
    Text - Shannon omggg i'm so boredddd Shannon 10 min. ago Wow great opener, I'm soaking wet rn 10 min. ago save me please llol Shannon 8 min. ago Would you eat 12 kid-sized gorillas or 6 gorilla-sized kids? 3 min. ago do u have skyp.e request me rn o.k.? Shannon 2 min. ago Do you want to watch my movie adaptation of the holocaust? GIF Send a message...
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  • 34
    Text - Shelby YOU MATCHED WITH SHELBY ON 1/18/17 do you have a gag reflex Jan 18, 2017, 12:28 PM I'm *um yes or no? What a way to greet me answer the fucking question shelby Jesus I don't know want to find out? Sent No Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 35
    Text - Lexi YOU MATCHED WITH LEXI ON 1/14/17 Please hit me with your car Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 36
    Text - Cassandra YOU MATCHED WITH CASSAND RA ON 11/26/16 Hry Неyу* Nov 27, 2016, 9:00 PM Where should I hurry? Oh wait.. you meant to say hey. Awkward Nov 28, 2016, 12:06 AM Lol hehe I mean you come hurry over Nov 28, 2016, 12:50 PM Should I bring a condom? Sent Nov 28, 2016, 3:53 PM Yeah Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 37
    Text - Honey YOU MATCHED WITH HONEY ON 1/17/17 hey whatsup Max Uh-huh honey Sent Type a Message... Send GIF W E R O T Y U FG H S D A J K L ZX C V B NM X 123 return space
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  • 38
    Text - Annabel YOU MATCHED WITH ANNABEL ON 11/30/16 Subtract one A, one N, B, and E. What's left? Nov 30, 2016, 11:08 PM not sure what you're going for here, but if you were aiming for anal, you'd keep both As and if you weren't aiming for that, then Jesus Christ I'm a joke Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 39
    Text - Megan YOU MATCHED WITH MEGAN ON 12/31/16 I'm an Econ major, but with your anatomy and the right philosophy I think we could have some chemistry Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 40
    Text - Isabella Wanna kill me like that turkey in your really hot pic Hell yeah I'll stuff you like I did that turkey!! No like I want to you shove the 12 gauge in my ass and blow me out Oh that's not the only thing I can blow You wanna blow me? I don't have a dick I meant blow your mind with how fast l'll make you orgasm. I'm pretty talented in bed Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 41
    Text - Kristen YOU MATCHED WITH KRISTEN ON 1/8/17 Tinder told me to tell you why I swiped right... Kristen damn she's fine If you found her in a mine she'd be a diamond Yeah, her names Kristen she catches all the boys whistlin' Her reactions Priceless as she keeps on walkin just cuz she knows they shop at Payless and shouldn't be talkin I'm the type of guy you'll find on a mountain And well your the type of girl who'd have their statue on top of a fountain Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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  • 42
    Text - Kristine YOU MATCHED WITH KRISTINE ON 11/23/16 Can I call you? Nov 27, 2016, 9:02 PM So much for the midnight drive Sent Nov 28, 2016, 2:57 PM :) I'm never on here Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 43
    Text - Emmie YOU MATCHED WITH EMMIE ON 1/15/17 I won an Emmie for my performance in faking an orgasm once. Sent Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 44
    Text - Kaitlyn YOU MATCHED WITH KAITLYN ON 1/12/17 red, Trumpets are brass. What do you say, Can I eat your ass? Roses are Sent IType Send Message... GIF oh I'm 23 45 6 7 8 9 0 1 / $& ? ! #+= return ABC space X
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  • 45
    Text - Tori Messages About I'd enjoy a budding romance with your cliTORIs. 41 min. ago Why Why Why Tori 7 min. ago Send a message... GIF A
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  • 46
    Text - Lily I don't understand what isn't sweet about you sitting on my face? The fact u want me to sit on ur face You wouldn't like that? It's just not a great way to start a conversation What would have been a better option for me then? Hello,ur pretty (if u think i am), hi how are you?, how is your day going?, id love to meet you,etc Ok do you want to start over then? Sure, i guess Sit on my face please? Type a Message... Send GIF
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  • 47
    Text - Nicole YOU MATCHED WITH NICOLE ON 2016-11-07 I have a jeep Nov 15, 2016, 2:54 PM Ok I'll ride your cock Nov 16, 2016, 1:45 AM Ok when are you coming over? Sent Send Type a Message... GIF
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