'You're still single because you're not on Christian dating apps': Audacious father catfishes dozens of men, posing as his daughter to prove a point

Dating apps are the new way that people meet each other. Forget every Hallmark movie you ever saw where the boy meets the girl in the park as they both reach for mustard at the hotdog stand— organic meet-cutes just don't happen anymore. Nowadays, you and your friends can schmooze the local single population by changing your milage radius on Hinge or Bumble, hoping for a new crop of people to swipe right on. One woman, had sworn off dating apps entirely until her father decided to intervene in her love life. Dear ol' dad had no idea how the entire system worked, but he believed that if his daughter were on a nice Christian dating app, she would find the right man. 

Crown, a woman in her 20's who's an aspiring musician and TikTok star, recently endured one of the most classic joys of being single during the holidays. After being assaulted with questions on Thanksgiving, her father took it upon himself to diagnose her love life qualms by running an experiment of his own online.

“You're still single because you're not on Christian dating apps” 

During dinner, he started suspiciously spending a lot of time on his phone, asking Crown questions like “how tall are you?” and “what are your hobbies?" She immediately suspected he was up to something, but wanted to see how it would play out. Will her dad see how shallow the dating pool really is? 

Assuming the whole situation would pitter out once her dad realized he had to pay for dating apps, Crown let it slide. However, the next morning she woke up to her father with an excited expression saying that she had several new matches and a few guys, Steven and Tyler, are interesting in meeting her. Knowing how dating app relationships often pan out, she ignored the ‘interested parties’ and moved on with her day. Days late though, it turns out her dad had not relented on his use of the app, determined to make his point. 

After days of catfishing people online, her father had racked up a huge herem of men interested in his daughter, however, none of them were intriguing, polite, or seemed genuinely interested in meeting Crown. But it was too late for her dad, he was caught up in the compliments from strangers. Crown didn't go on any dates with any of these men however, she lives in Los Angeles and her dad unwittingly set up her profile in Ohio. Better luck next time Daddy-O, I guess there are single Christian men in Ohio that are available, but in LA, it's a different story. Bottom line, homegirl is still single and successfully avoiding all single Christians from Ohio.

#catfish