16-year-old forced to go to family therapy because she doesn't get along with stepsister of the same age, she demands she lives at her mom's house full-time: "I don't wanna be BFF's with her"

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Jul 25, 2025 1:00 PM EDT

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. Growing up with divorced parents is so common, but it's far from normal. We tend to normalize things as a survival mechanism. For example, I would normalize that my dad was hardly ever home in the evenings. When you're a kid, your life is all you know. You don't understand the nuances to situations, and you lack the coping mechanisms to fully heal from all the issues our parents imbue into us. 
Wouldn't it be nice if we could just fix them? To control how they treat us, make them embolden u with confidence, intelligence, and a good heart? Unfortunately, you can't control other people, no one can. It's a hard lesson to learn, but one that's necessary. I have a friend who learned it therapy, which brings us to the story below.
 

In the story below, the protagonist is a teenage girl whose parents are divorced. Not only are they divorced, but she has a stepsister of the same age. Read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01

    AITA for staying full time at my mom's to avoid my stepsister and my dad's expectations for our relationship?

    Cheezburger Image 10533059328
    via Polina Zimmerman from Pexels / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    My parents got divorced when I (16f) was really little and he remarried when I was 4. My stepsister is the same age as me. I spent every other week at dad's
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  • 03
    house so I had an equal relationship with both of my parents. My stepsister saw her dad once or twice a year and that
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  • 04
    stopped happening after a few years of my dad and stepmom being married.
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  • 05
    Because we were so close in age and similar-ish my dad and stepmom decided we would be the best of friends and do everything together. When I was
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  • 06
    at their house we were expected to hang out all the time, to include each other in everything even if it was hanging out with
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  • 07
    friends. My stepsister became super attached to it but I hated it. Especially the part about not being able to see friends without the other involved.
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  • 08
    After a few years my stepsister pretended to like all the things I did so we'd be in the same after school activities and so our
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  • 09
    birthday parties were identical right down to the type of cake we'd get. It also meant we got less gifts and had to share big
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  • 10
    stuff instead because "we both loved them anyway". At dad's house nothing was mine. Not my clothes, my toys or even my room.
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  • 11
    Whenever I tried to get space from my stepsister she'd complain to her mom or my dad and my dad would step in and tell
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  • 12
    me I needed to make time for my "sister". Him and my stepmom started pressuring mom to take my stepsister out with us. whenever we did things. I
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  • 13
    remember my stepmom calling my mom a c*nt for saying no to taking my stepsister to the trampoline park with me and my friends. Then it was my dad and
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  • 14
    stepmom yelling at mom for throwing me friend parties and not inviting my stepsister. And every sleepover my mom let me
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  • 15
    and my friends have was a huge deal to my dad and stepmom.
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  • 16
    My mom and dad fought in court when I was 10 because dad accused mom of alienating me from my stepsister and mom wanted to get me therapy to help
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  • 17
    me process the pressure I faced at dad's house. Dad didn't want me in therapy except for family therapy. Dad didn't win custody and mom got to put me in therapy.
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  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10533059584
    via SeventyFour from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 19
    I tried talking to my dad and telling him I didn't want to be BFFs with my stepsister and I didn't want to do everything with her but he ignores it. And he's so
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  • 20
    much worse now because he acts like I'm bu ying her when I don't want to talk non-stop to her or when I don't include her when I'm at mom's house. So I asked my mom if she could look into
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  • 21
    getting full custody of me. Her attorney said we could try and dad counter filed for full custody and so it was a back and forth between them for custody. Mom had the support of my therapist
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  • 22
    and because of that the judge decided to speak to me. She said she wanted to hear what I'd say but I didn't get to decide exactly. I told her everything and what I
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  • 23
    wanted and that I was serious about it. And the judge decided to let mom have full custody of me but the rule is I need to maintain phone contact with dad
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  • 24
    Cheezburger Image 10533059840
    via Eziutka from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 25
    if nothing else. It specifies how long, how often, etc. But I don't need to be at his house anymore.
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  • 26
    Now other than school I never see my stepsister and it's great. And at school I tell her I don't want to talk and walk away. Plus I get an extended break because summer. It's great and I'm happy
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  • 27
    about it. My dad's ped which I expected. But he told me I wasn't very nice about any of it and that I might not have bu ied my stepsister before but now I basically am and I'm punishing
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  • 28
    her for loving me and being my sister. He said I acted like a spoiled mean girl who couldn't. handle sharing with someone. And he also said I ran away from
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  • 29
    most of my family. I don't think so but maybe he's right and I do hate that I lost my dad in all of this. AITA?
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