If a cat owned a cabin in the woods, like some of those fairy tale characters, they would invite you in on a cold winter's night, you weary traveller you. They would help you out of your wet clothes and sit you by the fire. As the evening progresses they would bring you food, tell you stories of epic battles against mice, and slowly, unbeknownst, to you, they would make the fire grow, and grow. Until all of a sudden the house is ablaze and all is lost. Luckily, cats do not possess that level of autonomy over this world and are limited to their smol, pawdorable bodies that limit them to some hissterical albeit rather spicy activities that are the purrfect way to light and ignite our inner hooman fire.
So curl up with the fur baby nearest and dearest to you and settle in for some spicy cat memes to reheat your caturday. You may want to cover your cat's eyes during certain parts.
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This is very likely the immediate reaction of every cat that is told what to do. Just imagine how difficult life would be if our feline friends could talk back to us. We would be penniless from buying them fancy food, covered in claw marks from displeasing them. Ultimately, they would take over the world, one cute look at a time.
They are learning to use invisible machinery. All hope is lost for the hooman population. It was good while it lasted, but how are we ever meant to defend ourselves when a whole armada of cats on invisible planes, boats, tanks and apparently bikes comes at us. Just imagine the yelling from the cats, that alone will be enough to smash every window in every city around the world.
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