The Cringiest Parenting Texts of the Week (November 28, 2023)

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Nov 28, 2023 1:00 PM EST

It's the week after Thanksgiving, and if you're lucky, you're moving on into these last crazy six weeks before Christmas with a clear head and a full belly. If you're among the many unlucky ones, you're still reeling from the last week of having to interact unusually closely with your family. Or perhaps you didn't go home for this holiday and are dealing with the ugly aftermath of your absence. 

All I can say is this is a prime week for cringe texts from parental units. Most weeks are about occasionally petty squabbles regarding religion, LGBT identity, or an absentee parent trying and failing to come back into their children's lives. This week is all about whether somebody wasn't around to eat the dry turkey with people they feel like they have to be around. I don't know about y'all, but the latter compels me in a way that the former could never. 

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  • 01
    Unknown4me_ 22h Insane dad trying to forcefully get me back to russia. To clarify: he claims russia is 100% safe and war will not touch me (translation is not perfect) SMS
    via u/Unknown4me_
  • 02
    There is no war in russia. what is this Who is giving all this lies to you? 13:02 13:02 13:03 ✔
    via u/Unknown4me_
  • 03
    anonaccountsrry 18h Moms opinion on Starbucks SMS :
    via u/anonaccountsrry
  • 04
    Wide awake now Aww adorable Is the baby inside Starbucks. ? Have you ever looked up what Starbucks is all about? It's interesting Yeah I have, that's why she's here If you used Google it's not near the truth. They lie. Wasn't inspired by Moby . It was inspired by evil topless mermaids that would intise sailors and then kill them. There is to this day evil witches n warlocks that pray there evil over the food and put curses on it in hope to ruin people's lives. But Google don't say that anymore.
    via u/anonaccountsrry
  • 05
    Colorless_Human 1d I tried giving him another chance but oh well SMS PAINFUL ...
    via u/Colorless_Human
  • 06
    Hi. Where's How have you been I miss y'all. Wed, Oct 25 at 15:23 I hear you're doing well on school In Mom said you wanted to talk to us Let's make things better between us. No, I need to see y'all 3 iMessagg Hi Yeah other than math class but im gonna change teachers soon in the room ive been alright okay did you want to talk on the phone about this, you type kinda slow so it seems like you're having trouble typing to me No, I need to see y'all face to face. I need to thanks to me anyway lets ta
    via u/Colorless_Human
  • 07
    No, I need to see y'all face to face. I need to look at your faces. I'm patient I'm not pressing you. I miss my kids, I'm sorry things turned the way they did. It took me a while to get past my anger at your comments, they were real hurtful and nasty. I realize you were angry and lashed out. Or is that really how you feel? yes it was how i felt because you also did and said some really hurtful and nasty things. we are not at the point where we are comfortable seeing you face to face. you said yo
    via u/Colorless_Human
  • 08
    seeing you face to face. you said you wanted to fix things so you have to build back the trust that you threw away. Threw away? How did I manage to do that? if you still dont get it then i dont think this is gonna work out. im not going through "The Bad Parenting Pamphlet of August 2023" again. I dont need you to reconnect with me, and neither does we have been doing just fine and based on that message what im picking up from you is that you did not take our feelings seriously and you want this
    via u/Colorless_Human
  • 09
    06:39 Mon Nov 27 THANKSGIVING I wood like to see you two, Regards, and Found in Sent Mailbox Will I? He sent this from his work email, lol no. i blocked you for a reason so do not email me. Sent from my iPad 5G 100% Add 11/20/23 分 Thursday X
    via u/Colorless_Human
  • 10
    Apawllo24 1d My mom making thanksgiving so much better (reupload) SMS : ...
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 11
    < It was hard and it was nice at the same time. Mom How was yours? + How'd thanksgiving go? Yeah? Just like busy and stuff or? Because you aren't here. iMessage Yeah. Oh it was good. Pretty simple it was just her parents and us. Over there for a few hours and then did Christmas decoration here
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 12
    < Glad you had a good time. Wish you could have made time to see us. Mom > + I guess I'm still not understanding why you didn't. Sounds like you had the time. Even for dessert. Just a couple of hours. Me too. I would've loved to visit 0 iMessage Because you don't want her at the house. We had to bring the other car back to her parents and I wasn't going to have her sit in the car. By time I could've worked it out it would've been late and I'm working 40 hours this week. I have no problem coming
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 13
    < Mom > I understand that it would've been a little more work on your part to do that, but I still think it was possible. I think if you really wanted to, you could've made the effort. If you were only at her house for a few hours that left an entire day. You could've went to her families, went and did Christmas stuff with her and then you could've come here for a couple of hours. We could've talked about the schedule. We could've tried to arrange something. I don't know if you're just trying to
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 14
    < Mom cried, and Bro 2 had tears in his eyes. Bro 3 won't stop asking when you are coming over and Cousin won't talk about it. 1 Other cousin was bummed out when I said you weren't coming. I've been doing my best since I found out from your dad that you said that you're not coming to not be sad. I've done my best to try to help your siblings understand what's going on while they feel broken hearted and sad crying on my shoulder not understanding why you're not here I don't know if you could care
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 15
    r Mom > Counselor either. So I'm just biting my tongue and praying. I don't know if you understand how hard it is on the entire family. I guess you don't. I guess you don't think you matter to us. I guess you don't think that you aren't valuable to us. I really don't know what it is. But you are loved and you are important here. You can't leave a family that you're a part of when you are so loved and valued and important, and think that it wouldn't affect us all. Especially in the way that you h
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 16
    < Mom > the direction you want me to after how you both made the decisions that you made. I told you when I saw you at the college the other week that we could look at moving in that direction. I guess that's not enough. I don't know. But what you're asking of me is too much. You're asking me to be someone I'm not by, just pretending that nothing has happened and putting a smile on my face and opening up our home to your girlfriend. You should know me better by now. I'm doing everything in my po
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 17
    For context I left my house in the beginning of October with my girlfriend because of her and how difficult she is (difficult is a major understatement). My mom blames my girlfriend for everything even though she hasn't spoken a word to her.
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 18
    Apawllo24 OP. 1d EDIT: For those asking about my girlfriend I am just as confused as you are. She has not spoken a word to my mother than "Okay" when my mom decided to chew her out for picking me up to go on a date without my mother's consent (how dare I, a 21 year old, leave my mom's house). The last straw for me with my mom was her forcing me to go to a family event when I had a mountain of school work to do for university. I ended up packing a bag and had gf pick me up. My mom chucked her key
    via u/Apawllo24
  • 19
    anonaccountsrry 1d Mom upset I put devil horn filter on my baby SMS
    via u/anonaccountsrry
  • 20
    Take the devil horns off my granddaughter please. Not funny. I was at church today slain in the spirit by God. Laying on the altar. We don't play games with the devil. He's the enemy. He kills steals and destroys, and there is no love in him. Can you just put little flowers in her beautiful hair. Can you not Not what. I love my little grand- baby. Why you think they call her Grand! You do that again to an innocent picture you won't be getting anymore Don't talk to your mother like that!
    via u/anonaccountsrry
  • 21
    I have been studying the bible and God's word for five yrs. That's all I do. Everyday and some nights. He shows me things I need to know. If you care anything about yourself, read revelation. The time is close. We are on the sixth seal. The seventh seal is the last one. When that happens the antichrist will reign for seven yrs. And it will be I on earth. One of the last signs is the euphrates river drying up. And it just did. Alot of stuff is going on in this world right now. Everything is prepa
    via u/anonaccountsrry
  • 22
    savthegreenbean 1d My dad being himself after I told him happy thanksgiving SMS ...
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 23
    Happy thanksgiving I love you NOV 23 AT 10:01 PM I love you, did you celebrate it I'm not going to say it, it was just another day for me NOV 25 AT 1:06 PM So did you celebrate Thanksgiving We ended up going to Uncle but I just sat there the whole time and barely ate Didn't know anyone there and I'm too tired to enjoy being anywhere Nobody invited me nor did I get a plate brought to me, awesome being 52 and Nobody giving a about you, but I'rood f ↓ everybody
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 24
    Nobody invited me nor did I get a plate brought to me, awesome being 52 and Nobody giving a about you, but I'm good f everybody Well I would've brought you a plate if I had the gas to And I knew I couldn't invite you to Unclesince you and mom can't be around each other It's cool, you got gas to go to but not enough to come an extra 8 miles for me, like I said f everybody My gas light was literally on while I was still on the interstate coming home I don't purposely exclude you from anything ever
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 25
    I don't purposely exclude you from anything ever I'm not going to argue with you, you can say f me if you want to Whole time me and Brother were saying how we wished you were there Yeah cause I found our you'd already been here for 3 days, dad, leave me alone you want to be like your mom and make excuses 10:42 AM You know, it's hurtful the way you talk to me. I'm not a kid. I'm a grown woman with two kids, one of them still being a newborn. You're right that it took me three days to come see you
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 26
    Yeah cause I found our you'd already been here for 3 days, dad, leave me alone you want to be like your mom and make excuses 10:42 AM You know, it's hurtful the way you talk to me. I'm not a kid. I'm a grown woman with two kids, one of them still being a newborn. You're right that it took me three days to come see you. I spent 16 hours driving down here with a one week old and the first day I went to sleep. Second day I unpacked. And as SOON as I could on the third day we went over there. It's n
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 27
    My (24F) dad (52M) after I wished him happy thanksgiving. My husband and I, along with our two kids (one being a week old at the time) moved back to my hometown one month ago traveling 16 hours. He is upset we didn't also see him the day we got back, but I planned on making it a surprise as I told my parents I would never move back. My dad is very aware of our financial troubles, and it took every cent I had to get pull ups and diapers and put the remaining in gas to get to my Uncle's thanksgivi
    via u/savthegreenbean
  • 28
    3- r/insaneparents u/rlpierce7111d My mother texting my daughter (15F) about not responding to her husband. SMS
    via u/rlpierce711
  • 29
    < Yesterday 1:15 PM Hope you had a good Thanksgiving Pops told you Happy Thanksgiving. Are you not talking to us either now? Or what? We are your grandparents i responded to him. He said he didn't get anything. His# is the same Today 1:15 PM Pops got your message. Thank you Love you Text Message
    via u/rlpierce711
  • 30
    My daughter showed me this text thread yesterday. Texts to my teen daughter from my narcissistic, untreated bipolar mother who I have been no contact with for about 4 years now. For context they live 1,300 miles away so we don't see my parents ever but I leave my kids out of the whole thing and have not restricted my (teenage) kids from speaking to them at all. Despite this, my parents seldom reach out to them anyway.
    via u/rlpierce711

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cringey text message crazy things parents say cringe text texts sad cringe parenting cringe pics texting parent cringeworthy Parenting Fail parents Parenting FAILS
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