Silliest Statements Made by People Who Are Not the Brightest Crayons in the Box

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    What is the silliest statement you have ever heard someone make?
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    What is the silliest statement you have ever heard someone make?
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    RavenmoonGreen Party 1 day ago • edited 10 hr. ago An adult telling me that a ship will disappear over the horizon, and out of sight, thus proving that the world is flat
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    tyintegra 1 day ago I had a boss say "oh you don't want kids, you should just have one to try it out". Really, and what happens if I find out that I truly don't want kids? Can we just put it back where it came from?
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    Five_Star_Amenities · 1 day ago A friend of mine said she got more tanned when riding her bike than she did when walking because on her bike, she was "closer to the sun".
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    corviknight2259 - 1 day ago Someone once told me that paramedics/nurses/doctors are not allowed to do CPR on someone they know because it's "a conflict of interest"
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    fappyday 1 day ago "I thought Kalamazoo was a made-up place, like Abu Dhabi." The woman who said this was a grad student. :/
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    NotBadSinger514. 1 day ago Sat down to eat with a friend. I said "I'm famished" she looked at me, laughed and LOUDLY she said to me "I swear you make up words sometimes"
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    [deleted] 1 day ago • I used to work in a pharmacy when I was pre-med. We had a new girl join as a clerk who was pre-pharm, we actually attended the same university and happened to be taking organic chemistry at the same time. Bright girl, studious, very book-smart but lacking in
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    common sense. One day at work, we were talking about our weekend, and one of my buddies commented that he had gotten blackout dr k from red w ne one night. This girl, A-student, bright future, no says "I didn't know red w ne got you dr k, I
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    wine!". We lost it laughing. Long story short, she went on to pharmacy school and as far as I know has been successful in her field. Just a funny anecdote, I guess
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    Proud Cat Ladyxo . 1 day ago A friend once said she couldn't take Southwest Airlines because she was flying east to Florida.
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    erager 1 day ago My ex MIL told me that trains run west in the winter and east in the summer.
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    JustMeerkats · 1 day ago I worked at a place that gave a military discount. Family (mom, dad, adult son, adult daughter) walked in. Dad was reading the prices and pointed out to the son that he could get a discount!
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    This kid takes the sign, reads it, and says, as God is my witness: "I'm not in the military. I'm in the Army."
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    BuckleupBirds - 1 day ago A woman tried to send back a dish. She didn't understand the components of it and tried to tell me that she couldn't eat it because she was allergic to crunchy. Like yeah the texture. Not the ingredient that we had made crunchy.
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    Velociraptornuggets 1 day ago One time I was walking with my husband and I saw a familiar- looking neighbor walk out of his front door. I was trying to remember where I had seen him before, when I finally placed him - I'd seen him walk out of his garage, located in an alleyway behind his house,
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    which despite being connected to a different thoroughfare is, in fact, part of the same house. Unfortunately, I didn't put that together in time to avoid saying: “doesn't that guy look just like the guy who lives in the back of that house?”
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    We met the neighbor at a block party a few months later and my husband introduced him to me as "the guy who lives in the front and back of his house."
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    miserylovesicecream · 1 day ago Had someone in 4th-5th grade try to convince me that the word "saw" was spelled "sawl". After trying to correct him, he responded by incorrectly sounding the word out in a very condescending way by pronouncing the "L" at the end.
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    No Matty, just because you're pronouncing it wrong doesn't mean it's spelled that way. F*** changing names for anonymity. His name was Matty and he was a m n.
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    n. 1 day ago "Raw oysters are good if they are cooked right." He is successful IE professional. Conscientiousm
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    mistyeyed1 1 day ago My ex husband told me in the summer time that it doesn't get any hotter in a standing, closed up car, than it is outside.
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    SeaweedThief - 1 day ago "It's a good thing they put a fence around that burn pile. Don't want the fire getting out of control and reaching the shed."
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    Temporary-Fee-10 1 day ago At a water park, I overheard someone curiously asking how the water at the top of a waterslide knows when to start flowing
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    No-Consequence-5181 · 1 day ago my stepmom was talking about her dentist appointment where she was about to have a cavity fixed on the right side of her mouth & said "well it cause i'll have to chew on the left side of my mouth, but im right handed so its hard".... girl what?
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    raginweon 1 day ago A dude i met thought a polar bear underwater would be considered a blue food. Person A: "There are no blue foods naturally in the wild." Person B: "A polar bear underwater is blue. You could eat that." Group: "Wut?"
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    Comeflywith Em - 1 day ago My sister once asked me how long I've had my birthmark... I just stared at her
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    Muttandcheese · 1 day ago Me, sitting on the toilet when there's a knock on the door. Me: "I'm pooping." Wife: "What?" Me: "I'm pooping!" Wife: ....(knocks again) Me: "GO AWAY!"
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    Wife: "Don't yell at me, I didn't know if you were in there." Me: "i told you TWICE that I was in here. And the fact that you said 'what' means you heard SOMEBODY say SOMETHING behind the CLOSED door!" Wife: "Don't get mad me!"
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    Me (-shyness fully set in now): "Go use the bathroom upstairs!" Wife: "I don't need to use the bathroom. The door was closed, and I just wanted to know if anyone was in there." Me: "......what. The. 11
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    K lrog8 1 day ago I watched my niece get into a fight at kindergarten. This boy was being mean and pushed her. She pushed him back pretty hard to where he fell. He jump up made a "karate sound" and said he knew kung fu. My niece kicked him straight in the I and said: "I know tofu!" I burst out laughing, while the mom was telling me that my niece was ap th.
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    AHOY Stop_Plate_Tectonics - 1 day ago I'm a male with a twin sister. After clearly stating that my twin sister is a "she", people invariably ask if we're identical.
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    Retiree66. 1 day ago A parent told me his kid didn't need to learn how to work with others because anywhere the kid went for the rest of his life there would be someone to give him orders.
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    Parking-Car4557 - 1 day ago My husband, as he was looking at a pickle jar, says "why are there cucumbers in the ingredients?" I'm still married regardless.
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    Jwagner6oh. 1 day ago My wife: hurry up and water the lawn, its about to rain"
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    cgulash 1 day ago My kids' friends' dad is a medical doctor. Me: I heard you got a dog. Him: Yeah. A poodle. I didn't pick it. Me: What'd you name it?
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    Him: Peanut. It's a boy. Which is weird, right? Because I thought all poodles were girls. J doctor!!! He's a
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    super_common_name · 1 day ago I once heard a woman say that kids are less susceptible to sunburn because they're further away from the sun than adults are. But the one I really can't stop thinking about is my friend (who is smart, I swear) told me that movies and TV shows cannot use the name of any existing person, so all media
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    makes up brand new names for people. He thought the name "Wendy" didn't exist before the 1958 Disney movie of Peter Pan. Despite the fact that Peter Pan was a play written in 1911 and
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    "Wendy" is a nickname for "Gwendolyn." How someone can hear themselves say such a thing and not question it inside their own brain just fascinates me. I plan to never let him live it down.

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