'I swore to tell the truth. I never agreed to tell it in a way that makes her life easier': Judge orders man to stay during a trial he voluntarily attended, man maliciously compiles

Author image for Isabella Penn
Isabella Penn
Jan 15, 2024 5:00 PM EST

Anyone whose been in a courtroom before, knows how unnecessarily long proceedings can be. The slightest mishap can force everyone to start from square one. Well, that's exactly how this hearing that the OP voluntarily attended was going. Frustrated by the prolonged process, he decided he'd had enough and attempted to make an exit. That is, until the judge stopped him and told him he couldn't leave. He tried to explain to the judge that he was not summoned, he was there willingly, so the judge pulled out the big guns and ordered him to stay. So, the man compiled. Maliciously compiled that is. 

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  • 01
    Posted by u/Comply_maliciously24 21 hours ago ^ "You're not allowed to leave, you have to testify as a witness"
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 02
    This just happened about an hour ago, but here's the back story. It's a long one.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 03
    About 2 and a half years ago my apartment was broken into during a camping trip. Some things were stolen, including multiple firearms. A year and a half ago one of my firearms was found with some kids selling
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 04
    crack in a small city right over the border of the next state. The plea deals fell through and the girl the cops had initially mentioned was going to trial. I receive a letter in the mail telling me of the c rt date and location, but it is explicitly NOT a summons.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 05
    Whatever, I want my gun back sooner than later, so I go. Both the prosecutor and the assistant prosecutor are out sick, one with covid. They make us hang around for a while for no reason and eventually I just leave, they didn't
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 06
    like that, but whatever, being there was legally voluntary. I tell them they can mail me the new date and I'll deal with it then. 3 weeks go by and here we are this morning, I get home from work and I check my mail. There
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 07
    are 2 letters, one for the first girl, and another's for a guy I know just as an accomplice from the updates about the girl. His trial is today, and hers is tomorrow. I go to the courthouse 40 minutes away and let them know I'm here,
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 08
    everything is fine. They bring in the jury pool and spend 2 hours getting down to 7 jurors. The trial starts and we're just patiently waiting, 4 cops and 1 other civilian victim/witness. They tell us
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 09
    no worries, this will be super quick, they basically just need to ask if it's the firearm I reported stolen and I'll be on my way. They call in all the cops, who are getting paid this whole time, first. It's now 1pm. I've been up for 24 hours, on 3 hours of sleep the day
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 10
    before, after working a 12+ hour overnight shift. My entire body is cramping, I'm super uncomfortable, I'm exhausted. I last ate at 10pm. The assistant district attorney comes out and tells us they're taking an hour lunch break. I tell her I can't stay
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 11
    and I need to leave. She tells me I'm not allowed to, I already presented as a witness to the judge, I'd been summoned (I hadn't), they can charge me with this or that, one of the cops tells me they could detain me, the judge could order me (after I
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 12
    point out I haven't been summoned and again, this is voluntary). Basically they try and strong arm me when all I want to do is go home. I point out that this guy isn't even who I was told was found with my gun. The
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 13
    assistant DA starts explaining how oh no, he totally was, i don't know who you heard that from (my local PD mentioned the girl by name originally), giving me all these details about the case. Then reemphasizing, I really MUST stay, or I'll be charged with a crime.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 14
    Don't worry though, we'll get you in right away, so you can leave soon (soon being in more than an hour, minimum). Here's the thing, the judge issued a sequester order first thing in the morning before jury selection.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 15
    I say fine and wait. Here comes the single greatest act of malicious compliance I've ever committed in my life. All the attorneys come in, all the jury comes in. The judge makes me swear to tell the truth. I do. As
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 16
    soon as I finish, I blurt out the prosecutor broke the sequester and was telling me about the case during the break. STOP. Everyone, except the lawyers out. Including me. Eventually They bring just me back in. The judge again makes
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 17
    me swear to tell the truth, confirms I understand what's happening, tells me the importance of a fair trial (maybe don't witness tamper then?), and explains that witnesses are never to volunteer information and are to only answer the questions.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 18
    You've been summoned and it's a legal obligation. I let him finish and mention that I have NEVER been summoned. He says "Then I'm ordering you, understood?" Yes. Everyone comes back in. We all take our oaths again. The
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 19
    prosecutor that was threatening me starts asking questions. Here's the thing, I swore to tell the truth. I never agreed to tell it in a way that makes her life easier. She asks me some basic questions, name age, what I do for work etc. Then she gets into the actual questions, do I own
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 20
    weapons, did I report any stolen around this date, did I own one of this model, did I report this model stolen etc. "is this your gun?" "it certainly looks like it". Did the XXXX police contact you when it was recovered? "no" "Who did?" "YYYY police department" (my local pd). Did they give you any
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 21
    details regarding how it was recovered? "They said it was allegedly used in a crime by girls name" Defense objects, and the judge strikes that from testimony. By now the DA is realizing that she's giving me too much lee way and starts asking for yes or no answers, eventually asks if I'd recognize the serial number if I
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 22
    saw it, I tell her no, and that roughly sums up my questions from her. Then it's the defendants turn, and it goes exactly as you would expect by now. I answer truthfully, but in favorable wording. " you said it looks like your gun, but you can't confirm?" "I'd need to compare the serial number against the police report
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 23
    or the gun shop which still has it on record" "Do you know who stole your firearm?" "No" Do you recognize zzzz?" "No". She asked a few more plausible deniability questions and then I was free to go. I can't wait to be back tomorrow for the girls trial. I'll probably be
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 24
    much less malicious, but I know the DA will be nervous when she sees me. Court is officially over so the sequester order is no longer in effect, good times, and don't worry, if I botched her case in this regard, that kid had more than enough charges, he should have taken the plea deal.
    via u/Comply_maliciously24
  • 25
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jury judge malicious compliance court defendant hearing petty legal system justice served Reddit theft funny
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