‘Tell me you love me’: A 3 Date Situation Makes a Wrong Turn When Man’s Expectations Are a Little Too Unhinged

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Mar 11, 2024 12:00 PM EDT

Boundaries are a big deal for everyone. Once crossed, it's hard to get back in the same place you were before they were broken. Establishing, respecting, and adhering to them can make or break the relationship. If they're broken too early on, then typically that means a short duration of the relationship (or situationship). 

With dating apps, you meet all kinds of people, people you never thought you'd meet. As jarring, unexpected, and bereft as dating on apps can be, it's not impossible to find your match made in heaven, but we won't say it's easy. People seem normal on their profile, but oftentimes it's a façade that disappears pretty quickly on in the date. If your intentions are to build love and trust slowly over time and the date tries to coerce you into actions or words, well it's a red flag in the making. Enjoy this Tinder anecdote. 

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  • 01
    r/Tinder 15 hr. ago fundlebundle01 Went on 3 dates with this guy, and one of them he left his glasses in my car. This is our conversation about us meeting for coffee to talk more and return his glasses. P (More info in description)
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 02
    Sound great babe Can we make love afterwards Oh ok..? How's this? Yay that works! And let's just do coffee Dont worry about it Im curious on your response to that Had a really busy week so far, I miss you, would just like to make move to you. Simple ? I understand that part, it's okay to want that. Im curious on your response to me saying no I said oh ok? Meaning I would think you want the same thing Then in said don't worry about it, it doesn't matter you don't want to do to
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 03
    doesn't matter you don't want to do to Yeah The "oh okay" didn't read as understanding to me, it read like you felt a type of way about it. That's why I wanted to check 11 it is then I'll let you know closer I might have a meeting Sounds good Especially based on on conversation yesterday about not holding back on letting me know when you want it.. And you told me to do the same So something must have happened and idk what Do you feel like not holding back means that both parties are always going
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 04
    going to say yes or be in the mood? Well instead of saying Mets just do coffee tell that person a little more.. Say I just don't feel up for it but maybe on Wednesday or Thursday Do you see how that's a little better communication wise Than further more in relationships there's something called sacrifice.. So ultimately if both parties weren't interested in the timings if even though that ordson had a horrible day then wouldn't happen So if you can home from a bad day and you wanted to talk or h
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 05
    I felt me saying "just have coffee" communicated that I wasn't open for it, but I can keep in mind that you prefer more explanation. And you're right, there is sacrifice in a relationship. But you also need to keep in mind this is our third date and sacrifice goes both ways. I know I communicated with you how I feel about being pushed as a primary factor when I'm still getting to know someone as well. I hoped me explaining that would help you keep it in mind going forward Ohhh you know what this
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 06
    I agree with that. Feel free to send me your address and I can mail your glasses back to you Yeah we can just meet up and you can give me them I don't feel comfortable ke giving my address out We've only been on 3 dates if you can respect that We can meet in open public parking lot etc Completely understandable Yeah just call me when you get a chance so we can meet up. Feel free to bring a friend or idk shykne if you don't feel comfortable it's totally fine Do you just wanna keep our meet for 11
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 07
    Ok see you then Because it sounds like you may have impromptu meetings today, I took the liberty of bringing your glasses to the location I sent to you. That way you can get them when it works best incase anything comes up. I gave them your name so you can let them know you're there to get them. + Same place is fine I appreciate the time you've taken to get to know me, and our openness in conversation. Best of luck! Wait you left my glasses at the coffee place What's their name?.. I gave it to t
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 08
    Thank you just wanted to make sure! But yeah definitely think that this isn't a good match. You have a child and I don't believe you have the timet Gove to someone. Also when you start putting preconceived notions on this is only our third date it leads me to believe something else was going on in your life and that's not right At least you know what it feels like to have a man genuinely pursue you. I wish you the best and hopefully you start dating men that's worth it I wouldn't want the same t
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 09
    10h ago Technical Scallion... "Tell me you love me" "Sir, this is a Wendy's"
    via u/Technical_Scallion
  • 10
    tabatam 13h ago ● Wow. You gave him a lot more bandwidth than I would have. Good riddance.
    via u/tabatam
  • 11
    InsiDS 14h ago This was difficult to read. Both because of his lack of autocorrect and because of his subliminal intentions. Good on you for seeing through the bs.
    via u/InsiDS
  • 12
    xsoy_divisionx • 13h ago I'd never give his glasses back because he can't read a room either way. He can go walk into a river
    via u/xsoy_divisionx
  • 13
    MapleSurpy 14h ago Dawg after that "can we make love afterwards" | would have told him that I'd give them their glasses back in a public place and then immediately cut off contact. This dude is going to bury you under the floorboards.
    via u/MapleSurpy
  • 14
    fundlebundle01 OP 15h ago I'm 26F and he's 32M. We both had a conversation before our first date of expectations and what we're looking for. We both agreed we're wanting a long term relationship and are trying to find something serious,
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 15
    talked about sexual and emotional expectations. I told him that sex isn't off the table, but I don't feel comfortable with sex being pushed so quickly in the beginning since I want to emotionally connect with the person first.
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 16
    The last date made me feel extremely unsafe. As I was saying goodbye, he looked at me completely serious and said "tell me you love me". I didn't say it. He left his $700 glasses in my car, so we were planning on meeting today for me to
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 17
    meeting today for me to return them. Here's our conversation it. in us planning
    via u/fundlebundle01
  • 18
    arkygeomojo • 10h ago "Well instead of saying let's just do coffee tell that person a little more..say I just don't feel up for it but maybe on Wednesday or Thursday. Do you see how that's a little better conversation wise?" Oh man,
    via u/arkygeomojo
  • 19
    the rage bubbling up inside of me when I read this...not only is he a pushy creep and weirdo, but he's also a condescending What a . I'd have maybe stomped on the glasses and sent him a pic of the pieces. You're a better woman than I. Jesus Christ.
    via u/arkygeomojo
  • 20
    Blush_01 13h ago Make love? My dude, at 3 dates in, that's J. You don't know the other person, much less love them. D
    via u/Blush_01
  • 21
    DrunkxAstronaut • 10h ago Fighting about before you've even had it.... Run don't walk
    via u/DrunkxAstronaut
  • 22
    Insert_girly_Usrna... • 11h ago It's the inability to form comprehensive sentences for me. Run girl!
    via u/Insert_girly_Usrna
  • 23
    _NaN_ • 14h ago At first Looked like someone instead looking for daily of a relationship, nothing super wrong; glad I kept reading... as a man, I feel shameful for those who say "well you had a chance at a man like me, take me or you'll never find anyone like me again", as if they are
    via u/_NaN_
  • 24
    me again", as if they are entitled to be liked and pleased, and turn to mocking when you say something they don't want to hear.
    via u/_NaN_
  • 25
    Danimal_collective • 10h ago ● "Make love" "sacrifice in relationships" after 3 dates absolutely bonkers
    via u/Danimal_collective
  • 26
    Future-Bluejay874 14h ago I'd mail those glasses back and block him forever. 3 dates and that's what you get. RUN!
    via u/Future-Bluejay874

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hilarious drama tinder cringe relationships lol couples love dating apps reddit thread red flag online dating Reddit unhinged funny dating
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