'Being in the moment': The People Behind Cheezcake Answer Intimate Questions About Love and Life #3 (March 22, 2024)

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Mar 22, 2024 4:00 PM EDT

Welcome back internet queens and princesses. This is a special edition of CheezCake where we go behind the scenes of the brand to open up a dialogue about life, relationships, and love. From countless Reddit stories, to scrolling through content all day about love and relationships, we decided to share some insight with the world. Now, while we thought it'd be fun and cute to post about these topics, it doesn't mean we're trained in relationships or love. But with the six of us combined, we have years of experiences, boyfriends, dating, hilarious encounters, and more to laugh and jeer at while scrolling your phone. 

So today's topic: biggest green flags when on a first date. It's always interesting to see other people's answers, and sometimes there's a trend about something I never even thought of. It can be educational and beneficial to see other people's perspectives about these things, to learn from and understand. 

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  • 01
    A huge green flag for me is when someone respects my boundaries and doesn't try to push things. I've had first dates before where a guy will just grab my hand to hold it, or immediately try to kiss me. I like when a guy is more gentle and intuitive, when he lets me initiate with him, or at least asks before just trying to pounce.
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  • 02
    My biggest green flag is being in the moment. If I'm on a first date and they keep their phone on the table or keep checking it throughout the date, it makes me self-conscious and feel like they're not really interested in being with me. A second one would be sharing food. I know that sounds silly, but you can learn a lot from someone by watching how they share things. Are they going to be overly polite and not take the last bite? Will they be forward and say “I'm taking the last bite", or will
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  • 03
    When someone shows up 5 minutes early. I cannot stand people who waste my time and show up late. It's incredibly self-centered. So yeah, arriving a couple of minutes early is a huge green flag for me. Another green flag would be a very conscious and slow physical touch. On a first date I often don't even kiss the person, so having someone respect my boundaries and only attempt to get close or touch me when I am signaling via body language and verbal confirmation that this is okay.
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  • 04
    When someone is able to put their phone down and not look at it while we're talking to each other. I hate it when I'm on a date with someone and all of a sudden they get a text and then completely forget about where they are and what they are doing. The only exception I will accept is if they want to show me a cute picture of their pet, of course.
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  • 05
    When a guy actually plans the date as well as opens the door (car, restaurant, bar, etc.) for me
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  • 06
    When a guy comes to pick me up for the date. When they are curious about me, ask questions, and are genuinely interested in what I have to say. They don't only talk about themselves or touch their phone on the date. We can talk about aliens, psychology and get into the nitty gritty philosophical subjects.
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  • 07
    They don't drink too much when you are out for drinks. They let you talk and ask questions because they are actually listening and absorbing what you're saying. They don't have their phone on the table. They let you pay for at least one thing. They're not annoyed if you don't stick to whatever their “dating itinerary” is--I love it when a date goes off script and we end up doing something totally random. One time we decided to walk off the path in a park and ended up face-to-face (through a fenc
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  • 08
    A huge green flag is if a guy can plan a date that includes something super fun, like some sort of activity more interesting than just a basic dinner date (ie: rock climbing, laser tag, snorkeling, etc.) It's also a green flag if your date actually wants to know more about you-I want to date a person who actually wants to ask real questions and talk about things that matter, versus just fluffy, shallow topics and 'look how amazing I am' antics. For example, one-sided conversations where your dat
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