'He said he had an alpha personality': 20+ flagrant red flags that made regular folks run for the hills

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Apr 9, 2024 4:00 PM EDT

As Lisa Kudrow as Wanda Pierce in Bojack Horseman once said, "When you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags," which is one of the most poignantly true statements anyone has ever made, especially in an adult cartoon. When you love someone, or when you want to love someone, it's easy to overlook their flaws. Only when you have a healthy distance from a situation can you see it for what it is. 

But some red flags are redder than other red flags. Some flags are so red that you should actually call them crimson. These behaviors, which range from subtle to flagrant, help reveal people's true colors, whether they like it or not. Reading through these might make you thankful that the people in your life aren't the monsters seen here. Or maybe they are and you're figuring it out. Either way, it's good to know. 

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  • 01
    "That's a little terrifying"
    via Toa Heftiba
  • 02
    r/AskReddit u/madison_nn • 22h What was a red flag that made you stop talking to a person immediately?
    via u/madison_nn
  • 03
    thetiredninja 20h • I told a guy I only had time for a coffee date because I had a study group to attend. He kept trying to extend again and again and eventually asked if I would go "watch a movie" at his place. I said uhh no, I have to leave now and he knocked on my car window so I'd roll it down, then refused to let go of the top of the glass. I had to pull away slowly with him still holding on. Study group laughed their off when I told them why I was late. He didn't get a second date.
    via u/thetiredninja
  • 04
    siobhanenator • 14h Honestly that's a little terrifying. Glad you got away!
    via u/siobhanenator
  • 05
    Cheap-World3227 • 20h My coworker told me he knew his wife was having a seizure at work. Drove to her job (retail/grocery) asked where she was they told him she hadn't shown up. So he knew she was in her car but he decided to shop around a lil bit before finding her. By the time he got out to her car someone else had called an ambulance and was helping her. I haven't been able to look at him the same.
    via u/Cheap-World3227
  • 06
    pricklynobody ⚫ 21h • Had a date with a girl who told me a couple of stories about her life, and ended them saying "Nah, I'm just kidding." At the end of the date, I felt like I knew less about her than I did going in. Made me feel really uncomfortable.
    via u/pricklynobody
  • 07
    TheCaptainhat · 21h This guy I'd meet for coffee for "mentoring" I figured out was just a liar. Not even about important stuff, just dumb random things. Was super easy to notice, and was insulting that he'd think I was that gullible.
    via u/TheCaptainhat
  • 08
    EnigmaFrug2308 • 20h Told me that they wanted to drown someone at some point just to watch the life leave their eyes. Not anyone in particular. Just wanted to experience murdering someone, specifically through drowning. I noped out of there as fast as I possible could.
    via u/EnigmaFrug2308
  • 09
    Fantastic Pear • 21h When they used me as an alibi for cheating on their spouse.
    via u/FantasticPear
  • 10
    legendary_millbilly ⚫ 21h An old buddy I used to work with stopped in to When he started explaining that he learned you don't need a drivers license because the gov is a big corporation and we can renounce our spot and declare ourselves "freemen" I just gave up on him. It's been around 5 yrs now.
    via u/legendary_millbilly
  • 11
    Minute-Ad8501 • 20h He said he had an "alpha" personality...yikes
    via u/Minute-Ad8501
  • 12
    drifters74 19h • She insulted my job, while not having one, and made fun of my hobbies, all while I was letting her stay at my place for a few months rent free.
    via u/drifters74
  • 13
    _hootyowlscissors • 21h In high school my longtime crush finally started to reciprocate my feelings and we got to hanging out. That's when he told me he and his buddies liked to ride their bikes, and swing baseball bats, as they chased terrified homeless people down. When he saw my horrified expression he was like "we don't actually hit them! They just think we will. At worst we'll throw brown paper bags full of dog at them! Hahaha." That relationship lasted about half a day.
    via u/_hootyowlscissors
  • 14
    DWright_5 21h Friend of mine told me she was having an affair with a guy who provides "intimidation" for a criminal organization. Said she didn't know that about him when the affair began. She implied that it wouldn't be safe for her to dump him. After hanging up the phone I said to myself, "Stay away from her."
    via u/DWright_5
  • 15
    Cichlidsaremyjam • 20h I went on a date with this girl who got visibly angry at the fact I hadn't seen a few movies like Reservoir Dogs. I thought she was joking for about 30 seconds, I ended up leaving and losing her number.
    via u/Cichlidsaremyjam
  • 16
    Lemp_Triscuit11 • 21h I'm an alcoholic that's pretty jazzed about being sober now. You'd be surprised how many folks will pull out the "... and you don't think you could just get away with a drink or two after being sober this long?" idk, but I never plan to find out and it's concerning that you feel the need to tempt me.
    via u/Lemp_Triscuit11
  • 17
    matt95110 - 21h A new guy at work started chatting with me while I was getting a coffee and it went from "hows the weather" to full on racism in less than 5 minutes. I just walked away.
    via u/matt95110
  • 18
    benoitblanc19 • 21h I had a friend that I grew up with, played on the same teams, our parents were friends, we were in each other's weddings. He was in the police academy and came over to the house one night during that time and said "Ya know, I thought I wanted to be a cop so I could serve and protect, really help people, ya know? Now I realize it's so I can drive really fast, carry a gun, and beat people up" He also went on a rant about how all homeless people should be rounded up and buried/t
    via u/benoitblanc19
  • 19
    salty-lemons • 21h This guy was disgusted by how "ugly" and "gross" a party host's newly rescued dog. The dog was emaciated and had patchy fur from starvation and neglect. Instant rejection from the sphere of people I want to have in my life.
    via u/salty-lemons
  • 20
    createthiscom • 20h Dated a woman who had no job and lived off of rental income from a single property. She told me she wanted to start a new business but had no savings and didn't want to work. This was immediately after she told me she I away a 400k inheritance in a few years by traveling. I laughed and told her that was what jobs were for. I'm pretty slow most of the time but I'm pretty sure she wanted me to be the solution to that problem.
    via u/createthiscom
  • 21
    Daniel0909 • 19h I dated a girl for a short while who quickly started alluding to me being the love of her life. She then all of a sudden said she needed to "find herself" and said we should break up. I told her I had fun, thanked her for her time and went on my way. Not even two days later she called me crying asking "That's it!? You're not even going to try to chase me!? Did I mean so little to you!? I can't believe what a heartless you are!". Nope... Got out of there but not without a plethor
    via u/Daniel0909
  • 22
    어 pendletonskyforce • 21h Had a friend who is bipolar. He received a restraining from a girl. He started talking online to a female friend of mine. She told me she was feeling uncomfortable. I told him to leave her alone and he said no and I couldn't tell him what to do. I pretty much ended the friendship right there. I think he's doing better now but I refuse to be friends with him again.
    via u/pendletonskyforce

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