Wife Gets Left Behind on Honeymoon as Husband Upgrades Himself to Business Class Without Her, Leading to a Rocky Start to Their Marriage

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    AITA for ignoring my husband during our flight when he expressed anxiety over flying?
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    I [33F] recently married my husband [30M] and we took a 3 hour flight to Mexico for our honeymoon.
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    I fly a lot for my job, so I have racked up a lot of miles. My husband isn't a big fan of flying, though he has gotten better and tends to just hold my hand and close his eyes during take
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    off and landing (mostly okay when in the air). When I booked our flights I requested to use my points if an upgrade to business class became available, but made it clear I only wanted this upgrade
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    if two seats became available and then basically forgot about it. Then comes the day of our flight. I was so excited for this trip, I checked us in online, all is going well, and then when we go to board the person
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    scanning out boarding passes stops us. She says it seems that my husband was upgraded to business class, but ONLY him and asks if that is okay. I immediately say no, we are on our honeymoon and would like to stay together. But then my
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    husband jumps in and says, “No it's fine, I'll go to business class!" I look at him in complete shock and he tells me that I fly all the time and have been in business class before, but he hasn't. So he deserves a chance to experience it.
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    I see we are holding up the line, so I feel like I just need to agree and get on the plane. To say I am pd off is an understatement. He is all smiles, taking his seat and I go back to my seat where they sit
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    me next to an old woman with a baby on her lap where my husband should be sitting. Within maybe 5-10 minutes of sitting there, trying to hold back tears because my husband left me alone on our flight during
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    our honeymoon (and uses MY points for his upgrade no less), he starts to text me saying he feels anxiety over flying. I ignore the texts and stop looking at my phone.
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    Within maybe an hour after we are in the air, he comes to the back of the plane to find me, offers me half of his business class breakfast and asks me why I was ignoring him that he was scared and needed me to tell him it'd be okay since I am
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    such an experienced flyer. I told him maybe he should have thought about that before leaving me alone before our honeymoon even really began. He gets angry, tells me that this may be the only time he gets to fly business class and he was
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    giving me half his breakfast to make up for it so I could at least be supportive of his genuine fear. I roll my eyes, sarcastically say “thanks” and he goes back up to his seat.
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    When we landed I tried to just move on and forget about it so that we could just enjoy our honeymoon, but he guilt tripped me about not comforting him via text before
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    take off and now I am wondering if I am being unreasonable and should have just let him enjoy his time in business class and ensure him it'd be okay. So AITA?
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    pulchra_lunae . 3 days ago Enthusiast [7] INFO: did you get stuck in a middle seat in economy??? If so, we ride at Dawn.
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    Wooden Disaster 9800 OP. 3 days ago Thank god, no! Aisle seat. We have flown together three times together in the past (Florida, Vegas, and Europe) and made a deal to alternate if one of us had a middle seat. I
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    think the flight was overbooked and they just gave a random person in a middle seat an upgrade to business so they could fit more people in economy. I have status that allows me to do use 500 points to upgrade if they seats are available,
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    usually I don't bother putting myself on the upgrade list, but the agent I spoke to on the phone said she could ensure we'd be upgraded as a couple or not at all.
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    Difficult Ad1474 · 3 days ago Well then I am putting my pitchfork away but still side eyeing your husband. NTA.
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    Temporary_Nail_6468 · 3 days ago I'm usually pretty team "married couples can sit apart for a few hours on a plane" but this is their honeymoon............
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    floridaeng 3 days ago Definitely NTA - Tell your husband actions have consequences and since he wanted to be in Business Class without you he gets to fly without you. The fact he did this on your honeymoon trip just makes it worse.
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    owls_and_cardinals 3 days ago Professor Emeritass [99] NTA. Your husband made a really questionable decision and he was essentially having to live with the consequence of the decision. He jumped at the chance to sit - alone - in biz class and I guess it didn't occur to him how evidently
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    very reliant he is on you during flying. Regardless of his phobia, he's a grown man, and it seems like he made it through takeoff just fine if he was asking your help when he'd already been served food.
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    It's like he was using his need for you as a wopon, to make you feel obligated to forgive him for making a pretty choice given that it was your honeymoon.
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    -UP2L8- 3 days ago INFO: Is everything always about him?
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    Wooden Disaster 9800 OP. 3 days ago He grew up poor and has this mindset of always wanting to have more things, more money, etc. I grew up middle class, but had awesome parents that made sure I got the opportunities that they
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    "FOMO" mindset and thinks he deserves to experience things as an adult because he had so little growing up. We just have very different ways of looking at things - I care enjoying what I do for
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    work and don't care about salary and promotions, he wants to make all the money and get all the promotions no matter what.

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