'The groomsmen were handed a list of everyone who had a place': After Wedding Ceremony, Couple Surprises Guests by Revealing Only Some are Invited to the Reception

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    r/weddingshaming • 1 day ago weddingstoryanony The tiered wedding nobody knew about
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    Throwaway because the bride and groom will definitely recognise themselves in this story. Names changed. The wedding took place a few years ago in London. David and Laura were your typical
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    bougie 20 somethings and I don't know if they were just clueless or had astounding audacity. It's very common in the UK to have a tiered wedding, ie some people are invited to the whole day and some are invited to just the evening reception.
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    EDIT TO CLARIFY - if you are invited to the whole day you will be invited to 1. The ceremony - in this case 2pm 2. The dinner, speeches and other events - - 3pm to 7pm 3. The evening reception to include drinks, dancing and maybe a buffet. 7pm to midnight
  • 05
    OR you will be invited to 3. The evening reception only. Usually this is people you don't know too well, distant relatives, colleagues etc. Nobody is offended by this in itself.
  • 06
    What's NOT common is inviting people to only 1. The ceremony and 3. The evening reception.... Especially when they haven't been told. So David and Laura got married in the town hall and hired London double decker
  • 07
    buses to take everyone to the reception venue - they'd hired out an entire pub. My partner and I boarded the bus, got to the venue and sat at our table. It was then I noticed a lot of people weren't there. The following is what I was told by a guest later on who hadn't "made the cut".
  • 08
    After leaving the ceremony (around 3pm) the groomsmen were handed a list of everyone who had a place at the meal. Everyone else who tried to board was turned away and told to come back at 7pm.
  • 09
    Friends, relatives.... maybe 20 or 30 people had to leave until after the meal. They all went to a different pub, where they ripped open their cards and used the money to buy themselves food and drink. Some left altogether, I'm surprised they all didn't.
  • 10
    The groomsmen were mortified, they didn't know what was going on. The couple seemed oblivious, and I'm being charitable here.
  • 11
    doubleOh ⚫ 2d ago So the couple basically wanted to maximize on gifts but minimize on feeding their guests. Pretty Glad to read how many people ended up using their cash gifts for themselves.
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    LilyRose9876 • 2d ago I've seen similar happen with church weddings but it was handled much better as evening guests were clearly told in the invitation that they were evening guests but welcome to come to the church to see the ceremony. In my case, it meant I had a very formally dressed nandos meal with my mates in between church and evening reception
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    luminous-fab... • •2d ago Edited 1d ago I had that once. Invited to the ceremony but just the close family were invited to a meal together, and the rest of us in our nice outfits had to find somewhere to eat. It still feels 20 years on. Edit: Then we went to a place for the reception, we just had a several hour gap in the middle in a random city with people we didn't know
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    Accomplished-Ad3219 • 2d ago . They all went to a different pub, where they ripped open their cards and used the money to buy themselves food and drink My kind of people
  • 15
    Sunbear86 ⚫ 2d ago Funny how weddings are different around the world. In Aus we just have ceremony and reception. You sometimes get people show up to the ceremony to watch (like your parents friends, old neighbour etc) I guess because it doesn't cost anything to come watch. Reception is drinks, dancing, speeches, cake etc.
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    Supe_scienceskilz • 2d ago How do you say come to the wedding and then stop them from getting on the bus like they are going to an exclusive club? Highly offensive And I makes the groomsmen be the one to do it
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    Accomplished_Lio • 2d ago Not really the same, but I have family who had an afternoon wedding and an evening reception but there was nothing to do in between for FOUR HOURS unless you were in the wedding party and were bussed around taking weird pictures around town. Like half the guests left. Many changed out of their fancy ceremony clothes to more casual clothes.
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    meraii 2d ago • I went to a wedding where we were only invited to 1 and 3...but our little group were the only ones that applied to. I can only assume we had last minute invitations after the catering had already been booked but it felt pretty to have to up and leave the scenic countryside church to drive to a town to find somewhere to eat and then wait around to go back. When we did get back the groom was
  • 19
    all "oh hey help yourself to the buffet there's plenty left". Except we couldn't because there were no plates. We asked for plates and were told to grab the ones from our table...which we didn't have, because we were the only group not included in the meal. I honestly felt like a gatecrasher/beggar and it really tainted my view of my friend.
  • 20
    detikripur • 2d ago My sister had a cocktail gathering, court house ceremony with around 30 people, another cocktail/ food reception, lunch and THEN more people came for the big reception/ party. These people that came later were not family or close friends. And they were told beforehand. My sister told me all the people invited showed up and had a blast. We danced till the early hours.
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