Bride Rejects Entitled Sister-in-Law's Wedding Dress Gift, Stirs Up Family Drama and Possibly Ends Engagement: 'Everyone seemed to be excited, but I just felt confused'

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    r/AITAH 1 day ago Capital Manager_7070 AITA for refusing to wear the wedding dress my SIL gave to me as a "wedding gift"?
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    I(f27) met my fiance Jacob (m31) when I was 21. We've been together for 6 years and engaged for almost a year out of those. My mother's wedding dress has been passed down for generations and I remember being a little girl dreaming of walking down the aisle in it. We have
  • 03
    recently been wedding planning and we were invited to a dinner hosted by my fiance's family that was on Sunday. When we arrived, we greeted everyone and sat at the table to eat. SIL stood up and tapped her spoon against her glass and said that she had to make a toast.
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    She then said she would be right back before going into another room and returning with a large plastic bag. Everyone seemed to be excited but I just felt confused. I awkwardly smiled as I asked SIL what was inside the bag. She
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    opened it up to reveal her wedding dress from her wedding which was 2 years ago. Everyone began clapping as SIL announced that this was her official wedding gift to us and she wanted to me to wear her dress at the wedding. I tried
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    to smile but I guess I didn't do a good job of hiding my disappointment and everyone began asking me what was wrong. I tried to explain how I wanted to wear my mother's dress and that it was nothing personal, but that I refused to wear my SIL's dress. My SIL began crying
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    as my in-laws began tearing into me and comforting her. I just burst into tears and ran outside. My fiance didn't even come after me and after crying my eyes out on the steps for what felt like hours, he finally came outside and yelled at me to get into the car.
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    I was so confused, but I got into the car just to hear him berate me on how I had made such a big scene and embarrassed him infront of his family. He sounded so mad and he even said he couldn't believe he chose to marry such a "bitchy || (his exact words). My fiance also said how
  • 09
    SIL was just trying to be nice and that her dress was more modern compared to my mother's dress which looked like an "old rag" (also his exact words). I tried to tell him how much my mothers wedding dress meant to me because I promised her that I would wear it.
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    I felt like my fiances family planned this and put me on the spot thinking I wouldn't stand up for myself and just agree to wear SIL's dress. I don't think I did anything wrong but a part of me thinks I should have just gone along with it and then told SIL in private that I wouldn't be wearing the dress. AITA?
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    No_Order_9676 • 1d ago Ma'am you need to leave that whole family behind including your fiance Definitely NTA. You just had a peak into your future if you carry on with this relationship
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    Affectionate-Tap1967 . 1d ago NTA. But be thankful that he is showing you who he really is before you marry him. You have just had a glimpse of what your future is going to look like if you go through with your wedding.
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    Top_Sherbert_2918 • 1d ago The problem doesn't exist as the wedding shouldn't be happening anymore.
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    & hip hop_sweetheart • 1d ago . NTA - Tell him not to worry he won't be marrying you and then get away from him!
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    Elliewick • 1d ago NTA I want to bet SIL did this cause the fiance has been complaining about the 'old rag' OP wants to wear. It's bad enough he wants to dictate what OP will be wearing and does it in this manipulating way, but count in the complete disregard of her attachment to mom's dress, not having her back or checking on her, yelling, guilt tripping her, calling
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    names and completely disregarding her feelings and I can only make one conclusion: He is a POS and you need to leave him now! DO NOT GET MARRIED!!! I know this but you deserve way better! You will find someone who actually cares about you. Sadly your fiance is not that man.
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    Striking_Rip851 • 1d ago Run run so fast and so far. He called something important to you an old rag. This is not going to get better.
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    Sea-Still5427 • 1d ago The dress is not the issue - this is the issue: his vile language and lack of support for you. Please don't marry him. And who makes a public show of handing down their own wedding dress without checking if that's welcome? Is she just trying to feel good about not wanting to buy a present? Seems cheap and tacky. ESH except you.
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    Bonnm42 1d ago • Lovely, please get away from these people. As much as this situation view it as a gift. Your SIL finally made your in laws and your Fiancé show their true colors. This is not a person or family you want to be married into. A wedding dress is very special because it's meant to symbolize the person wearing it. If your dream is to wear your Mother's
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    dress, that's what you should be wearing. I kinda can't help but wonder if this was sabotage by your SIL. She should know how special a wedding dress is and should have spoken to you first before announcing she would be gifting you her wedding dress.

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