Husband Locks Wife Out of Their Bank Account After She Loses Her Job, Claiming She’s Eating into Their Savings, Despite His Sports Betting Problem

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Sep 17, 2024 8:00 PM EDT

One of the biggest challenges in a marriage is conjoining your financial situations and finding a way to handle it together. It is not easy to make the shift between being completely independent and having full control of your own money, to having to rely and depend on a whole other person.

When a couple is not on the same page financially, like when one is out of a job, that adds a whole other level of struggle that many couples have an extremely hard time getting out of, much like the married couple in this Reddit story. The husband (OP, original poster) decided to lock his wife out of their joint bank account after she lost her job, as he is insisting she is spending too much of their savings while she is not working. While it is not the most mature thing to do, one can understand the incentive behind this action, until one discovers that OP himself enjoys gambling, and has no problem risking his and his wife's money with sports betting.

Scroll down to read the full story and let us know what you think about the couple in the comments. After you are done, click here for a story of a woman who refused to attend her brother's 'adults only' party because of her kids.

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  • 01
    So, last week, I made the decision to temporarily lock her out of the joint account. I felt like I needed to take control of the finances until she either finds a new job or we can come to an agreement on spending. I left her access to a smaller account for daily expenses, but the main account is off-limits for now.
    via Designs by Carms
  • 02
    Am I overreacting for locking my wife out of our joint bank account after she lost her job?
    via smubewimping
  • 03
    So, my wife recently lost her job, and things have been tight financially. We had a bit of a cushion in our joint account, but she's been burning through it pretty quickly-
    via smubewimping
  • 04
    mostly on things that aren't really necessities, like shopping or eating out with friends. I've tried talking to her about it, but she always says she'll find another job soon, and that we shouldn't stress too much.
    via smubewimping
  • 05
    A few months back, I had some luck with a sports bet and won about $8,000, which helped us out when things were tighter. But now, I'm starting to worry because the
    via smubewimping
  • 06
    spending hasn't slowed down, and we're eating into our savings fast. I've asked her to cut back, but nothing seems to change.
    via smubewimping
  • 07
    So, last week, I made the decision to temporarily lock her out of the joint account. I felt like I needed to take control of the finances until she either finds a new job or we can come to an agreement on spending.
    via smubewimping
  • 08
    I left her access to a smaller account for daily expenses, but the main account is off-limits for now. She's really upset and says I'm treating her like a child, and that it's
    via smubewimping
  • 09
    unfair to block her from our money. I get that, but at the same time, I'm just trying to make sure we don't run out of money before she gets back on her feet.
    via smubewimping
  • 10
    Am I overreacting here? Should I have found another way to handle this? Or was I justified in locking the account to protect our finances?
    via smubewimping
  • 11
    fruithasbugsinit • 13h ago NOR reacting but not reacting enough to e.all variables. You are down one income, she is a spender, and you gamble? You both have habits to curb.
    via fruithasbugsinit
  • 12
    StrangledInMoonlight • 13h ago Winning $8000 is great, but how much did OP lose before wining that much?
    via StrangledInMoonlight
  • 13
    nehnehhaidou • 13h ago 'Gambler locks wife out of joint bank account after she loses job' isn't the moral high ground you think it is.
    via nehnehhaidou
  • 14
    avast2006 13h ago Putting aside for the moment that you are willing to throw money at sports betting (serious side eye)... No, if the two of you are in financial straits and she won't stop burning
    via avast2006
  • 15
    through the emergency funds on unnecessary stuff, you make it so she can't. Her being employed or not is irrelevant, beyond it setting the cash flow level. Put BOTH of you on a discretionary spending budget (mister sports betting), and stick to it.
    via avast2006
  • 16
    Levelbasegaming • 13h ago Did you talk to her before? Or you just did it? How's your gambling coming along? Slight over reaction in my view. If both are part of the account this could end up being a legal issue.
    via Levelbasegaming
  • 17
    Ladylslay 13h ago You are treating her like a child. You're not overreacting to want to draw the line and say that it's time the two of you made some definitive decisions about how money is going to be spent, but locking her out of an account that she's always had access to is... not okay.
    via Ladylslay
  • 18
    Dyerssorrow • 13h ago You cant lock someone out of a joint account. This was just your account that you gave her access to.
    via Dyerssorrow
  • 19
    Foreign-Cow-1189 • 13h ago Don't lock her out of the joint but put all the $$ in a private account she doesn't have access to.
    via Foreign-Cow-1189
  • 20
    Savings_Transition38 • 13h ago hey it's tough love. savings go unbelievably fast if you don't watch out. the problem (besides her feelings) is that she may lock you out one day. best figure out how you want to go forward with both of your inputs.
    via Savings_Transition38
  • 21
    Goodnight Moose • 13h ago NOR but she is your equal, locking her out IS treating her like a child. You have to get on the same page because if she did that to you for gambling, I don't think you'd be too happy. Both cases is childish behaviour.
    via GoodnightMoose
  • 22
    chiefsurvivor72 • 13h ago Of money is so tight- why'd you just get a tattoo? It sounds like both of you are fiscally irresponsible.
    via chiefsurvivor72
  • 23
    ૨ Reasonable-Tax658 • 13h ago Dont put your savings in a joint bank account save your own money and let her save hers. Joint bank account would probably work better for like mortgage/rent, car payments, groceries etc. probably should learn from this because legally she can spend the money how ever she wants
    via Reasonable-Tax658
  • 24
    • Igny123 13h ago You do realize that as soon as you're between jobs, she's going to lock you out of the joint account. Right? Will you be okay with that? I'm guessing not so much.
    via Igny123

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