Woman Refuses to Cancel Vacation After Brother Insists She Use the Funds to Help Him With Dental Bill, Favoritism Revealed When Mother Chooses His Side

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Oct 13, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. Some people have all the audacity in the world to demand whatever they want from others. When you're related and family members, it can be even more so. People lack a certain social etiquette when they're with their family, for better or for worse. 

In this Reddit thread, the original poster (OP) is a woman who's been planning a European vacation for over a year. She and her boyfriend have saved up, and now they're going on the vacation of their dreams. She thinks everything is going according to plan, that is until her brother calls her with an absurd request. Not only is it absurd to ask for this amount of money, but it's for a dental procedure he could have avoided if he took better care of himself. But you'll have to read the full story below for all the juicy details. 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH ⚫ 9 hr. ago True-Strawberry-9409 AITA for refusing to cancel my vacation after my brother demanded I pay for his "emergency" surgery instead?
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 02
    So, here's the situation. I (30F) have been planning a two-week vacation to Europe with my partner for the past year. We've both saved up a lot of money for this trip, and it's a big deal for us because we've never been on a major vacation together before. The flights, hotels, everything has already been paid for.
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 03
    Last week, my brother (35M) called me in a panic saying he needs emergency surgery for a dental issue. It's not life- threatening, but his tooth infection is bad, and it needs to be dealt with soon. He doesn't have insurance (long story involving bad financial decisions), and the procedure is going to cost about $10K.
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 04
    He asked me to loan him the money, but there's no way I have an extra $10K lying around after paying for this vacation. When I told him that, he got mad and said I should cancel my trip to help him, since "family comes first." He even suggested I ask for refunds on the flights and hotels, as though that would magically solve the problem.
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 05
    I told him I felt bad for his situation, but I wasn't going to cancel a trip we'd been planning for a year over his poor financial choices, especially when this isn't a life-or-death situation. He lost it, called me selfish, accused me of abandoning him in his time of need, and got our mom involved. Now, my mom is pressuring me
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 06
    to cancel and help him out, saying it's "just a vacation" and I can always reschedule.
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 07
    But I don't think it's fair that I should be expected to sacrifice something I've worked hard for because my brother can't handle his own responsibilities. AITA? Is he lying about the cost to drain me off my money or something?
    via u/True-Strawberry-9409
  • 08
    noplaceinmind • 9h ago • And how much is mom contributing, since she's butting in?
    via u/noplaceinmind
  • 09
    imothro 9h ago • "My deposits are all non- refundable. So sorry bro, I can't help you this time. Hope it works out for you." Then maybe consider distancing yourself from all of these abusive people. NTA
    via u/imothro
  • 10
    susanbarron33 • 9h ago • I used to be a dental assistant. There is no "emergency" that is $10K. A tooth extraction with bone graft and implant don't cost anywhere near that much.
    via u/susanbarron33
  • 11
    mutualbuttsque... •9h ago • NTA and even in the US I have a hard time believing this will be 10k. Removing a tooth is not 10k. Removing a tooth and getting an implant is not 10k. Sounds like your mom can help him.
    via u/mutualbuttsque
  • 12
    Financial_Bear_5... 9h ago • NTA. Mum can lend him the money if she is so concerned. Go, enjoy your hard earned vacation.
    via u/Financial_Bear_5
  • 13
    NanaLeonie 9h ago • INFO: Where does he live that a root canal is $10k?
    via u/NanaLeonie
  • 14
    SpectrumShado... • 7h ago • Two hours ago you responded to "Why are you alone" with "Because I love it." Did you break up with your partner in the past 7 hours or was this obvious fake actually fake?
    via u/SpectrumShado
  • 15
    CrinosQuokka • 8h ago • CareCredit is what I ended up using to make up the difference between my insurance and my total bill. The dental staff recommended it, and I was able to apply and get it. approved on the same day.
    via u/CrinosQuokka
  • 16
    PomegranateRe... • 8h ago • NTA- but I will put a PSA here. Tooth infections can quickly go south and become life-threatening. I've had two friends end up in ICU because tooth infections went into other parts of the body. One had to have his chest opened up to deal
    via u/PomegranateRe
  • 17
    went into other parts of the body. One had to have his chest opened up to deal with the infection that got into his lungs. The other spent months with a shunt in his neck to drain the infection away from his brain.
    via u/PomegranateRe
  • 18
    Dude needs to get the infection dealt with, but you aren't responsible for paying for it.
    via u/PomegranateRe
  • 19
    Harvard_Diplo... 9h ago • Another "family comes first" story. Al really like these. Must have a good karma return ratio.
    via u/Harvard_Diplo
  • 20
    • xlilyoce 9h ago • you worked hard for that trip. can't just cancel over someone else's choices. maybe suggest he joins a dentist payment plan or something. vacations matter too
    via u/xlilyoce

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