Woman Cancels Her Wedding After Her Fiancé Secretly Accepts a Job in Another City: 'He was expecting you to fall in line like a good little wifey'

Author image for Jesse Kessenheimer
Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Oct 26, 2024 3:00 PM EDT

Marrying someone is a huge and wonderful commitment. You're essentially planning your future with this person whom you love and it seems like in the early days of your engagement, the honeymooning phase paints everything pink. The world is your oyster until your husband-to-be goes off making huge life decisions without you. 

This woman in our next tale was engaged to the man of her dreams, planning their futures together, and getting excited about their wedding day, until he dropped a bombshell on her. He accepted a job offer in another city without ever talking to her. In secret, he'd made a gigantic life-changing move without ever talking to her about it, which is not a very husbandly thing to do. 

Keep scrolling to read how she rightfully reacted, canceling her wedding to reconsider a marriage with someone who didn't consider her a partner in life, but rather a sidecar on his one-man journey on the open road. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10419928064
    via TITOVA ILONA

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for cancelling my wedding because my fiancé made a major life decision without telling me?
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 03
    I hope you can give me some advice. I (28F) have been with my fiancé(32M) for six years, and we always talked about moving to a new city someday, but it was something we'd decide together when the time was right. Last week, out of
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 04
    nowhere, I found out through a mutual friend that he had accepted a job in another state. Not only that, but he had already signed a lease for an apartment-without ever mentioning it to me. I was completely blindsided.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 05
    When I confronted him, he brushed it off like it wasn't a big deal and said, "I figured you'd be fine with it after the wedding." I couldn't believe he thought it was okay to make such a huge decision without even talking to me. He said he
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 06
    didn't want to "stress me out" before the wedding, which just made me feel even more ignored. It was like my opinion didn't matter at all. This wasn't just about a new job; it felt like a complete betrayal of trust. I had always
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 07
    believed we were a team, making big decisions together, but now I was questioning everything. After a lot of thought, I decided to put the wedding on hold. I needed time to figure out if I could marry
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 08
    someone who would make life- changing decisions without consulting me first. If he could do this now, what would happen in the future? When I told my family and friends, their reactions were mixed. My mom thinks I'm
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 09
    should just go ahead with the wedding, but my best friend agrees that this is a huge red flag. My fiancé, on the other hand, is furious, saying I'm making a big deal out of "one little thing." But to me, it's not little-it's a sign of how we
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 10
    might handle important things in the future. So, AITA for canceling the wedding because he made such a huge decision without me? Or should I forgive him and move forward? I'm torn between feeling justified in my reaction and wondering if I'm being unreasonable.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 11
    Good Ice 240 NTA What about your job? Your family? Friends? Your Life? Sounds like he was just expecting you to fall in line like a good little wifey once you were married.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 12
    sweet-honeyyyy. OP Exactly! It feels like he didn't consider how this would impact my entire life. Marriage should be a partnership where both people's lives and choices are respected, not just one person making all the decisions.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 13
    catinnameonly. Your feels are exactly this. "I am the man of the house once we are married. My desires, needs, accomplishments will be met first. Your opinion is just decoration and doesn't hold value."
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 14
    This is exactly what he took away from you. Your mom is focusing on the wedding and not what comes after. This would have all been moot had he just shared the fact he was planning on applying for this job. When he got the job you had some say in where you will be living. He took your power away sis. This is a huge red flag.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 15
    Melykinzzz98 Exactly. NTA. Making a major life decision like moving without discussing it with you, especially right before the wedding, is a big red flag. It's not just "one
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 16
    little thing", it shows a lack of communication and disregard for your partnership. Putting the wedding on hold to figure things out is needed given the circumstances.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 17
    Atlantic Nikita Nta. That's not a red flag, that the whole comunist party flag. He does not respect you enough to talk to you about something so big, you are probably overlooking other very red flags. If i was you i would break up on the spot. He doesn't see you as a person.
    via sweet-honeyyyy
  • 18
    Odd-End-1405 NTA. You were just provided a huge favor, in you were shown exactly what "your place" will be once he has that ring on your finger. He is not and does not see you as an equal, a partner. A partner discusses life changing events. You will be "his wife", a possession that is expected to fall into line and allow him to lead. Dodged a massive bullet here.
    via sweet-honeyyyy

Tags

females marriage woman empowered empowerment Female Empowerment relatable interesting wife womens memes husband wedding womens female engagement Reddit ladies women lady
Scroll Down For The Next Article