Woman Calls Sister a Bad Mother For Making Her Children Pay Rent, Sister Retaliates By Accusing Woman of Coddling Her Children

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    r/AITAH ⚫ 15 hr. ago EqualAd2434 Aita for telling my sister she's the reason her kids don't want to come around
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    I 48 F have 4 kids. I have a daughter Kaylee who's about to graduate highschool, two sons in college and my oldest son Jerry who has been living with me since he graduated college a year ago.
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    My sister Sarah 50F has three kids, a daughter in highschool a son in college and a son who's getting his masters.
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    My sister told her kids that as soon as they graduate highschool they have to pay rent in college in they want to keep their rooms. I told her she shouldn't do that because it would drive them away. She told me that this is the way she wants to parent and I should respect that.
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    Yesterday Me, Sarah and my youngest sister, Jen went shopping to catch up and hang out. While at the store I grabbed four baskets to make Halloween baskets for my kids. I gave them each a mug, a blanket and candy and a gift card. Sarah asked why I was getting that. I told her I seen on social media people make
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    these baskets and I wanted to make some for my kids. Jen also got the things to make some for her kids. Sarah said that was completely unnecessary and we should stop babying our kids. I just told her I like doing nice things for my kids. You could tell that kind of made her mad, but we continued to shop.
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    Later Sarah came over for dinner. Jerry is a really good cook so not only does he do most of the cooking he also pays for all the groceries. While we were sitting in the living room my sister said when is he going to move out. I told her whenever he's ready. She said he should at least be paying bills. I said no, my goal as a
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    mother is to ensure my child succeeds in life. He's been saving up money to buy a house and I refuse to accept rent because that means it would take him longer to reach his goal. I explained that I don't even want him to pay for groceries but I physically can't stop him from doing that.
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    She scoffed but just ignored it. But what set me off is when both Jerry and Kaylee was passing through the living room I told them hurry up and write their Christmas list because I know some early sales are about to start.
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    Sarah said that I'm ridiculous and I'm not being a good parent because I refuse to unleash my children. She said they are too grown for Christmas list. She said I'm raising lousy and lazy kids.
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    Jerry told her to cool out, but I hurried and chimed in. I told her I'm a way better parent than her. I told her my kids are far from lazy. I had a son graduate salutatorian, my daughter is in the top ten percent of her class. My oldest son has a fantastic job. I told her to ask herself why does her children barely come to see you?
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    It's because they hate you. I asked her what good mom expects their kids to pay rent and go to school. I told her she was the definition of a parent, and she shouldn't have had kids if she was going to treat them like once they turned 18.
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    She just hurried and left the house. Later that night Sarah in the group chat includes all my siblings and my mom. Sarah said her side, I shared my side. Jen told Sarah she was in the wrong and that I have nothing to apologize for. My Mom told Sarah that it was unfair to comment on someone's
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    comment on someone's parenting styles, when she hates when the same is done to her. Sarah just left the group chat. I just feel really bad about what I said and think I should apologize for being to harsh. Aita?
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    takatine 15h ago • She told me this is the way she wants to parent and I should respect that. So....everybody should only respect her way of parenting....but she doesn't have to respect anybody else's?
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    Yeah, you have nothing to feel guilty about. Sarah needed that reality check. ΝΤΑ
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    hemiones 15h ago • NTA. She was constantly giving you unsolicited advice and opinions on your parenting style. It seems like you handled it with grace until she confronted your kids.
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    I don't think you have anything to apologize for. All you did was stick up for yourself.
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    Ok_Ring_3261 Ok Ring 3261 • 14h ago Apologize for what? Being truthful? Did she even like her kids? This "payback" mentality from people astounds me.... Your children didn't just show up with their hand out, you made a conscious decision to have them. If you did not want to
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    have them and love them forever without strings....you should not have had them. i don't want our daughter to leave ever - she's 28 has a great career and wants to buy a home - she can live here for as long as she wants and we would let her live with us forever if
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    she would because we - actually like her........

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