‘Am I supposed to care about your wife?’: Woman Accepts Mother-in-law’s Invitation to Christmas Vacation, Despite Ex’s Current Wife’s Discomfort, Causing Holiday Uproar When She Puts Her Foot Down

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Nov 21, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. Christmas is a ubiquitous favorite for so many people across the globe. From the beautifully lurid lights, to the warm meals and family time, most people will cite it as their favorite holiday. Some people spend Christmas with their parents, some with their partner's parents, and some with their nuclear family. But what about situations in which you're divorced and there are children involved?

This brings us to the Reddit thread. In this story, the original poster (OP) is a woman who's divorced, but has children with her ex. Her ex has now remarried, and the current wife is pregnant. OP's MIL has invited her and the children to a Christmas vacation. Her excitement fades when she receives an unwanted call from her ex. But you'll have to read the full story below for all the juicy details. Happy holidays! 

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  • 01
    r/AITAH • 18 hr. ago glitterycupcakes02 AITA for accepting an invitation to join my ex husband's family for a family Christmas vacation, not caring about his current wife's feelings?
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 02
    My ex(33m) and I(32f) been divorced for almost four years. We share two kids together, a 7 and a 11-year-old. He and his now wife married last year in the middle of April. She has a 12-year-old from a previous relationship and is currently pregnant with my ex's child.
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 03
    Friday was my 11-year-old's birthday but we her birthday party was hosted on Saturday at a bowling alley with me, my ex, his wife, his step-daughter, my 7- year-old, a few friends of my 11- year-old's and some relatives from me and my ex husband's side all attending. I was chatting with my sister and mom while having my
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 04
    youngest next to me when my former MIL approached us. She asked us all basic questions like how we been doing and how's life in all. She then brought up a planned week family vacation in Florida for Christmas and asked if I would like to join. My youngest immediately jumped up begging me to accept the invite. This
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 05
    would be the first time they ever planned spending Christmas out of town but I said yes. My youngest was happy and ran off to tell my oldest.
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 06
    Yesterday afternoon I get a call from my ex saying that he was informed about his mother inviting me on the Christmas vacation. He sounded exhausted over the phone but I told him I did accept the invitation. He then went on to say that his wife wasn't happy about it and that she didn't see the need of me going on this
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 07
    trip since him and I are no longer married. I asked him if that was suppose to mean something to me. He responded with she finds it disrespectful that I was even invited in the first place. I asked him "is there part where I'm suppose to care about how she feels because I honestly don't". He
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 08
    asked me if I really needed to go on this trip and told me that he doesn't want any problems or anything messing up this trip. I told him that there won't be any problems as long as he and his wife don't start any problems. I even suggested that if she has a problem with me going on this
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 09
    trip then maybe she could just stay home and that my kids are the only reason why I'm going. Not wanting to continue this conversation I made up an excuse as to why I had to hang up and ended the call. AITA?
    via u/glitterycupcakes02
  • 10
    dirkdiggler2011 .15h ago. You are probably being weaponized as the MIL does. not like the new wife.
    via u/dirkdiggler2011
  • 11
    Longjumping-La... • 17h ago • Top 1% Commenter I have a friend who is the 2nd wife in this story. First wife had 4 kids with the husband then divorced, my friend had 3 with him.
    via u/Longjumping-La
  • 12
    For many years, Christmas was spent down south and all of them went and stayed at the same resort including ex-MIL. My friend thought why should ex-wife miss out on Christmas with her kids? She was cool with it.
    via u/Longjumping-La
  • 13
    They don't go down south anymore but all of them. spend Thanksgiving together. I admire the adulting they all do, particularly my friend. NTA.
    via u/Longjumping-La
  • 14
    txparrothead58 • 17h ago • As a grandfather of 5 grandkids, once your ex MIL extended the invitation in front of the 7 year old, the di was cast. It seems like you and your kids have a good relationship with with the paternal grandparents, so enjoy.
    via u/txparrothead58
  • 15
    Greyeyedqueen7 • 15h ago • Top 5% Commenter As a mom and stepmom, I'd say it is time to tread lightly. XMIL started a whole lot of drama in front of the kids for a reason, and that reason likely isn't actually you. You're getting drawn into
    via u/Greyeyedqueen7
  • 16
    something that could be really bad. There's "all of us blend and get along great," and then there's "second wife is always second and needs to know her place." This reads like the latter to me, and that's not something you want to get caught up in.
    via u/Greyeyedqueen7
  • 17
    When my XMIL decided, after the years of hating me because I'd married her son and then celebrating the divorce, that she hated the next wife more than she hated me and tried to invite me on family trips, I didn't even bother answering. I just forwarded it all to the ex and
    via u/Greyeyedqueen7
  • 18
    told him to handle it. One of the few things he did, actually. Do you have to worry about the next wife's feelings? No, but being rude could backfire on your kids and you in weird or bad ways. It never hurts to take the high road.
    via u/Greyeyedqueen7
  • 19
    timofey-pnin • 13h ago • It's one thing if you want everyone to blend and get along. But it feels very telling that your reaction is "and I'm supposed to care why?"
    via u/timofey-pnin
  • 20
    LB7154 16h ago • Unpopular opinion but if this was written the other way and said "my new husbands mother keeps inviting his ex to things to let me know I'm a replacement "I feel like people would be siding with the new wife. I think they would be saying how the ex
    via u/LB7154
  • 21
    can have holidays with the kids separately and there is no need to invite her. While I agree it is better for everyone to get along sharing vacations with an ex even when you have kids is t necessary.
    via u/LB7154

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christmas family drama drama family feud relationships lol divorce love family reddit thread Reddit funny holidays dating vacation
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