Father Chooses Step-daughter Over Bio Son When They Plan Same Day Weddings, Son Goes No Contact Upon Finding Out, Leading to Family Dispute

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Dec 7, 2024 12:00 PM EST

Welcome back ladies and gentlemen of the internet. No one likes to feel like one of their parents are playing favorites, especially when it's with a step-sibling. There's no excuse for making your child feel so bad by abandoning him or her, and omitting yourself from their life. It's an empty hole in their heart that will never fully heal, and everyone who wants kids one day should understand the burdens of parenting first and foremost. 

This brings us to the Reddit thread. In this story, the original poster (OP) is a man who's not so close with his bio dad. His dad wasn't there for him growing up, but in his adulthood he's made an effort to be more ingrained in his son's life. His son accepts, but to his dismay notices how involved his father is with his step-daughter. Push comes to shove, and the OP sees how committed his father really is to her. 

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  • 01
    there for her and he doesn't want to miss my wedding so please move the date. To me it was just a step too far and I told him to get the out of my life and attend his stepdaughter's wedding. I understood he raised the girls so they were first for him but for all the fighting he did for me, to put this girl before me was too much
    via Canva
  • 02
    r/AITAH ⚫ 9 hr. ago Local-Net-3177 AITA for telling my dad to get the f out of my life and go attend his precious stepdaughter's wedding?
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 03
    My "dad" wasn't there for me growing up. He and my mom were 22 (mom) and 25 (him) when they had me. He didn't even pay child support for the first seven years of my life. He was ordered to but he always found a way to dodge support until eventually he stopped and paid it monthly and
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 04
    had to pay back the arrears. When I was 4 he met his wife and became a father to her daughter who is 16 months younger than me.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 05
    When I was 16 he had a change of heart and reached out to establish a relationship with me and fought to show me he really wanted this. I hesitantly agreed. He was trying really hard and even paid mom a huge lump sum of the owed child support from before.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 06
    What sorta won me around was how he handled his stepdaughter. She wanted me to live with them and wanted a brother because my dad and his wife had three daughters together and his stepdaughter, but they consider each other father and daughter because her father isn't in her life.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 07
    She was really pushy with me about moving in with them and insisting my mom kept me from dad/the family. This was not true but she wanted to paint my mom as the bad guy. Dad told her she was wrong, he sat her down with me there and told her he was a bad dad to me and made those choices and that I didn't need to
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 08
    move in. He kept his ground even when she pouted and acted like a baby about it.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 09
    I never wanted to be her brother and I don't like her. We have a lot of bad blod because she knows I don't want to be her brother and feels like I was wrong not to move in with them, while I find her entitled, selfish and bratty. But dad didn't punish me for it or make it seem like I was wrong for not wanting to leave mom after
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 10
    she raised me solo my whole life up to that point. He even paid for my college and was there when I needed him.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 11
    My relationship with him improved but his stepdaughter and his daughters came before me. That was something I always felt. The last year has been different for me and him. He has wanted me to be more involved in his family and get closer to his stepdaughter. He told me I've had
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 12
    10 years to embrace everyone and become a full member of the family instead of treating his stepdaughter like she's the enemy. I told him it wasn't going to happen. There was drama a few months ago because rumors have circulated that his stepdaughter's boyfriend cheats on her a lot.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 13
    There's no proof to my knowledge but the rumors show no sign of stopping and more of them come out as the months pass.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 14
    I got engaged last year and a month ago my fiancée and I set the date a month ago. My dad and his stepdaughter did a zoom call with me about it where she wanted me to give the date up because she's engaged now and wants to get married on that date.
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 15
    I said no. She whined and I ignored her. She went along and booked the date and then called dad via zoom and he called me and she said she needed dad to give her away. She said I had to find another date. I told her to off and left the call. Dad called me and said he needs to be
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 16
    there for her and he doesn't want to miss my wedding so please move the date. To me it was just a step too far and I told him to get the f out of my life and attend his stepdaughter's wedding. I understood he raised the girls so they were first for him but for all the fighting he did for me, to put this girl before me was too much
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 17
    and for something I booked first. Besides, he made it clear who's wedding he'd attend. My dad has tried to reach out despite what I said and his wife sent a long email the other night saying I should have compassion and understanding for him. AITA?
    via u/ Local-Net-3177
  • 18
    shammy_dammy • 8h ago. Top 1% Commenter NTA. Nope. And time to block her and her mother. Compassion and understanding for him? You weren't the one who put him in this situation.
    via u/shammy_dammy
  • 19
    Life-Wealth-3399 • 8h ago • NTA and I am willing to bet that the stepsisters wedding doesn't take place. And Dad will try to come to yours. DO NOT LET HIM!!! Block him and the lot of them and have a beautiful wedding and a long and happy marriage.
    via u/Life-Wealth-3399
  • 20
    Go-Mellistic 8h ago • NTA. You set your date first. She set hers on the same day to force your father into choosing her. He did. There is nothing for you to do here, except recognize how awful they all are and choose not to keep this drama in your
    via u/Go-Mellistic
  • 21
    life. I would go NC with the lot.
    via u/Go-Mellistic
  • 22
    Yepthatdidntdoit ⚫8h ago. Simply point out this is the same crop the step daughter pulled trying to get you to move in. It is about control over you and him. If he gives in then she has won.
    via u/Yepthatdidntdoit
  • 23
    legallychallenge... • 8h ago Your stepsister did what? That's... she can f right off and he can go along with her. He's enabling that behavior like he probably always has by giving in and attending her wedding instead of yours (it sounds
    via u/legallychallenge
  • 24
    like he would have done that even if you hadn't told him to f off). I mean let's be honest, the father of the bride is more important in a traditional wedding than the father of a groom. But, he should have told her what she did was unacceptable and he would not be able to
    via u/legallychallenge
  • 25
    give her away on the same day as his son's wedding. It would be entirely different if it was like an "oops, how did. this happen...", but she KNEW exactly what she was doing and she shouldn't be rewarded for it.
    via u/legallychallenge
  • 26
    Cybermagetx • 8h ago Top 1% Commenter Nta. She did this to make your dad pick. And he did. You had the date first. She could of picked 364 other days.
    via u/Cybermagetx
  • 27
    Popular-Anywhe... • 8h ago • compassion isn't for deadbeat dads, he only reached out to his only son after 3 daughters,if you carry his last name change it to your fiancee last name to twist the knife in his heart.
    via u/Popular-Anywhe
  • 28
    Outside Frosting... 8h ago • Time to keep him permanently out of your life
    via u/Outside Frosting

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