Mother Forces 18-year-old Daughter to be Free Babysitter While Grounded, Calls Her Ungrateful When She Refuses: ‘I shouldn’t be trusted with babysitting if I’m grounded’

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    I told her I feel like I'm being treated like a second parent, and I'm tired of always having to drop everything for her. She told me that's what family does and accused me of being ungrateful for everything she's done for me.
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    r/AITAH ⚫ 15 hr. ago Sarahtothemoon AITAH for refusing to babysit my little brother after my mom grounded me?
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    Hi Reddit, I (18F) live with my mom (42F) and my little brother (5M). My dad passed away a few years ago, so it's just the three of us. Since then, my mom has had to work a lot to keep us afloat, and I've always tried to help out when I can―cooking dinner, watching my brother, cleaning, etc. I didn't mind because I know
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    she's doing her best, and I love. my brother.
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    Last weekend, my mom told me I couldn't go to my best friend's birthday party because she needed me to babysit. This wasn't the first time plans got canceled last minute because of babysitting, so I was frustrated and told her I had been looking forward to this for weeks. She said, "Too bad, family comes first."
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    So, I ended up staying home, but I was upset and made it clear I wasn't happy about it. I still watched my brother and did everything I was supposed to, but I was kind of short with her for the next couple of days.
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    Fast forward to this week: I got invited to hang out with friends after school. My mom said no because I was "being disrespectful" last weekend. She grounded me and told me I needed an "attitude adjustment."
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    Now here's where it gets messy. Yesterday, my mom said she needed me to babysit again because her work schedule changed. I told her no. I said, "If I'm grounded, then I shouldn't be trusted with babysitting either." She got really mad and said I was being selfish. She argued that watching my brother isn't a
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    punishment, it's a responsibility, and I can't just pick and choose when to help out.
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    I told her I feel like I'm being treated like a second parent, and I'm tired of always having to drop everything for her. She told me that's what family does and accused me of being ungrateful for everything she's done for me.
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    Now she's barely talking to me, and I feel like the worst sister/daughter ever. My friends say I'm not wrong for standing up for myself, but my mom thinks I'm a brat. I get that she's under a lot of pressure, but I feel like I deserve to have some independence.
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    So, AITAH for refusing to babysit after getting grounded?
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    Sensitive-Ad-5... • 15h ago • Top 1% Commenter "I understand that I should help. What I don't agree with, is you forcing me to change well known plans last minute and punishing me for being upset about it. That's not fair, and you know it yourself "
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    Time to move out anyway
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    harrisonSanDie... • 14h ago • NTA If she wants you to coparent, then she can't ground you.
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    PoppyGrace0207 • 15h ago • NTA. My husband di d 7 months ago, and I rarely ask my oldest (close to your age) to babysit the youngest. I purposely rearranged my school schedule so that I'm available to my kids before and after school, and only have class when they do.
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    I know how stressful it is to suddenly be a solo parent, but your younger brother is NOT your responsibility. And your mom has had a few years to figure this all out. You deserve to go enjoy life and friends without being parentified. It's nice that you do help out, but your mom needs to make other arrangements.
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    System_Resident • 14h ago • NTA I'm glad you called her out of her treating you like a second parent. You did. nothing wrong and she needs to own up that she's treating you that way. If anyone needs to grow up, it's her. Family doesn't force a kid to look after a kid and force them in a parent role
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    Glam_Cupcakess • 15h ago • not the a**hole. if you're grounded for an "attitude," then logically, your attitude can't be trusted with childcare either. mom's playing uno reverse but forgot the rules.
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    Bobsmith38594 • 14h ago • NTA. Your mother needs to figure out child care because as a legal adult, you are likely to leave and start college, join the military, etc., and thus won't be available for watching HER kid. Your mother is trying to train you to be her default
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    child care option and guaranteed this will expand in terms of responsibilities she plans to saddle you with to full on parentification. INFO: OP, do you have any relatives?
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