Woman puts husband's colleague and self-proclaimed ‘work-wife’ in her place when he hosts his office Christmas party in their home: ‘[She] is crazy’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Dec 26, 2024 4:00 PM EST

You've probably heard the dreaded term, "work-wife" before. It doesn't matter if you're secure in your relationship or not—a fellow lady should never be eyeing your arm candy, especially when your husband is very candid about his life at home with his loving wife. When the self-proclaimed work-wife steps into your home and tries to taunt you with snide remarks and suspicious behavior, what do you do?

You'll probably do something like what the woman in this story did. Her husband was hosting his office in their home because their office Christmas party was canceled. Throughout the night, one female coworker in particular seemed to be on edge and especially awkward. In conversation, this coworker starts going on a tangent about how she's her husband's wonderful work-wife, and that the actual wife shouldn't feel insecure. The wife shuts her down before she can continue, and commenters hypothesize that the alleged work-wife was so angry because she failed to understand that the men in the office have wives at home. Scroll to read.

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  • 01
    "[She] explained that a workwife is a woman who works closely with a guy, knows him very well and helps him out at work, therefore acting as his wife. She also told me I don't need to feel insecure or jealous because there is nothing wrong with it."
    via Unsplash (Dane Deaner)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Aitah for setting a woman straight when she claimed to be my husband's workwife in my house?
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    I am posting this on a second account because I don't want to have it on my main. I (30F) am married to my husband Nick (35M) and we have a happy marriage.
    via ActualDragonfruit890
  • 04
    We have been together for 7 years and we are currently trying for a baby. The company where my husband works informed the employees that they will not have a Christmas
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    party this year due to them trying to cut out costs. Some of the guys from his department decided to have something small between them. My husband asked
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    if they can have their gathering at our place and I said sure. I was also excited to see 2 of his colleagues because they worked with me in the past and I wanted to catch up
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    with them. So we hosted last weekend. My husband invited the 2 colleagues I mentioned earlier who came with their wives, another guy who is also a good friend of ours and 1
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    woman (Lily) who also works with them. We had a great time and it was very nice for me to be able to see my former colleagues. They were telling me stories from their office
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    and we really had fun remembering our time working together. Lily however was very awkward but I assumed she was just stressed meeting new people. However she started saying strange things. At
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    first she mentioned how disapointing it must be for my husband that I don't work in the same field as him because we most likely can never share anything professionally.
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    Then she said how lucky I am to be able to have my career while being so young. For info, I have a high management position and I work in a mostly male dominated field. The
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    thing is that she was seemingly nice and sweet when saying these things but I can easily detect when people are trying to be passive aggressive or imply things.
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    Later on Nick was sorting an order out in the kitchen with our friend and I was in the living room with the rest. We were having a drink and the guys were mocking my husband's
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    habits of not paying attention during meetings. Lily then said that it's good that Nick has his "workwife" there to make life easy for him. I was confused and asked what
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    a workwife was. Lily laughed and asked me how is it possible to not know what a workwife was. The 2 other wives backed me up and mentioned they never heard this term either so
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    Lily explained that a workwife is a woman who works closely with a guy, knows him very well and helps him out at work, therefore acting as his wife. She also told me I don't need to feel insecure
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    or jealous because there is nothing wrong with it. In that moment I was ped but kept my cool and responded to her smiling that I have no reason to feel insecure since I am
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    the legal wife and actually the only legally and morally recognized partner of my husband. I added that it seems she does not know my husband that well because if she did she would have
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    known that we are not the jealous type since his best friend is a girl and I also have male friends. I think her comments rubbed everyone present the wrong way because when my husband came
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    from the kicken, one of the guys loudly asked him something along the lines 'Dude, have you ever heard of wokwives?' and my husband (in his own characteristic way) made a face and said 'No, Tis
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    that?'. After everyone left I told my husband what happened and he said Lily is crazy because they are not close and she is in no way anything else to him other than a work
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    colleague. I truly believe my husband and I surely know he does not encourage Lily in this. But today Nick told me that Lily has been complaining around the office that I was rode to
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    her while she was a guest in my house and that I humiliated her in front of her colleagues. The guy who is my former colleague and who was present when this happened defended me in
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    their office and told her that maybe she should not try to stir sh in other people's homes and that even his own wife was bothered by what she said. It is sweet that my former colleague
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    defended me and I appreciate it but this caused Lily to tell their colleagues that me and the wives are jealous of her and ganged up against her. My husband and the guys have been telling people that her claims are not true but I feel bad.
    via ActualDragonfruit890
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    So what I am asking is was I really that ride to her? I know my faults and I know I have a temper and I am impulsive so now I think that all this office drama could have been avoided if I did not answer back.
    via ActualDragonfruit890
  • 27
    Top_Anybody_1... . 5h ago NTA. You addressed Lily's inappropriate comments in a calm and reasonable manner. The concept of "workwife" might be harmless in some contexts, but Lily's presentation was clearly meant to provoke.
    via Top_Anybody_1806
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    Your reaction was justified given the setting and her implications. It's unfortunate that this has led to office drama, but the issue lies with how Lily handled the situation, not with your response. You were right to clarify the boundaries and correct any misconceptions in your own home.
    via Top_Anybody_1806
  • 29
    x_theNextHokage • 7h ago NTA, work wife is a pretty common term so I'm surprised none of you had heard it, but she was probably upset that all the guys she's been farming attention from at work have wives at home that they care about more than her.
    via x_theNextHokage

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feud workplace-stories work stories work coworkers wife husbands reddit story husband work wife subreddit reddit thread Reddit conflict
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