Woman uninvites entitled “best friend” from concert after she skipped her birthday party to hang out with a guy: ‘If my birthday wasn't a big deal then neither is the concert’

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    "She messaged me and said 'have you grown up yet or am I still not invited', I didn't respond."
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    AITA for uninviting my friend to a concert because she skipped my birthday.
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    I (f18) recently had a birthday party, I invited all of my friends with several months notice and even changed the date to better suit some of them. Usually I don't make a big deal of my birthday but as 18 is a pretty big milestone I put a lot of effort in. The
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    party had a theme and I spent days preparing food, drinks, music and even spent hundreds of dollars on a slushy machine because a friend requested it. On the day of the party my friend M (f18) called me and said she would probably be an hour late, mind you she told me this about 3 hours before it started.
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    I told her I understood and I looked forward to seeing her. Around the time she was meant to arrive, she sent me a message, 'lost track of time, will be there in a few hours', obviously this was annoying but I understood that things happen so I said 'see you then'.
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    When the party was coming to an end she messaged me saying, 'hey i'll leave here in 10, and will be at yours in about an hour', I told her people were leaving already and we were packing everything up and to not bother coming. She said okay and didn't message me again that night, after
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    everyone left, I went back inside where my mother asked me if M had shown up, I said no and that it made me feel like I wasn't important to her, my mother agreed with me completely. The next day I messaged M and asked what had kept her from coming, turns out she went to another party, so that she could hang out with a guy she liked. I told her 'okay' and that was that.
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    This leads me to the concert, as a present from my mother, I received 2 tickets to a concert I desperately wanted to go to, not wanting to choose between two of my friends, I paid 160 dollars for an extra ticket so we could all go together. A few days after my party I called M and said that
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    her missing my 18th birthday really hurt my feelings, she told me it was basically my fault as I told her not to come, I said I only told her not to because she would have gotten there an hour after it ended.
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    She said it 'wasn't a big deal and I needed to forgive and forget', I told her that it was a big deal to me and I wasn't going to just forgive and forget. She then said 'whatever, i'll drive you to the concert to make up for it what date is it?'. I told her that if my birthday wasn't a big deal then neither was the
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    concert, and that she was no longer invited. She got mad and said that the ticket was rightfully hers as I invited her, I said the tickets were technically all mine and I didn't want her to be there. She hung up the phone and didn't talk to me for a few days.
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    Yesterday she messaged me and said 'have you grown up yet or am I still not invited', I didn't respond. AITA?
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    Connect_Read6782 Tell her you lost track of dates and that you will get with her in a few days. Go to the concert without her. That isn't a true friend.
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    sunnyrainbowdance NTA. Your feelings are valid and your friend's dismissive behavior regarding your birthday party shows a lack of respect for your efforts and your friendship. You went out of your way to make
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    your party enjoyable for everyone including accommodating her requests. Her repeatedly delaying her arrival only to admit she prioritized another party over yours was hurtful.
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    MiaDayshine NTA at all here. You went all out for your 18th with slushy machines and the works, and switching up your plans just to get ghosted for another party? Ouch. Birthdays are a big deal, especially the big 1-8! It's totally fair to expect a friend to prioritize that over a random hangout, especially after making plans months in advance.
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    If she thought ditching your birthday for a guy was a non- issue and expects to just brush it off and still snag a concert ticket, that's pretty bold. You're justified in wanting to spend that concert vibe with someone who values your time as much as you value theirs. Concerts are for jamming out with true friends, not playing musical chairs with who gets a ticket. Keep your head up, and enjoy the concert with friends who show up for you!
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    jo_dnt_kno "Have you grown up yet, or am I still not invited?" That comment would have earned her an un-invite from the rest of my life. NTA.
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    procivseth "I have grown up and that is why you are still not invited." NTA
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    Clairekittenkit NTA. If she had time to plan for another party, she had time to prioritize yours. Birthdays are special, and you deserved to feel important on your big day. Good on you for standing your ground about the concert tickets!
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    Candid Awareness22... Nah, let the guy she likes buy her a ticket and take her.
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    And the gaslighting and trying to act as of she did nothing wrong and make OP feel guilty is the cherry ontop. I'd be no contact at this point.
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    Take one of the people to the concert who actually showed up to your party.

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